What to say to a small child when a mother dies. What can children ask? Questions often arise

Parents, trying to protect the child from the feeling of loss, and often, and simply not knowing how to say it, hide the death of a loved one from the baby. How to explain to a child - why beloved grandfather does not come anymore? Why it is important not to hide the truth about the death of a loved one from a child, and how to competently tell him about it, explains Vera Nikolaevna Mogileva, candidate of psychological sciences, child and family psychotherapist, in her article.

Why are we scared

Our attitude to death depends on the culture in which we live and what kind of attitude to death our parents once broadcast to us. Often, this topic seems terrible to adults. But for a child, it may look very different.

For example, in many cultures (India, Latin America), death is perceived as a joyful event, because. man passed his life path in this world, fulfilled his destiny, solved certain evolutionary tasks and left for another world. Even the death of a child is not perceived as a tragedy - he was born pure and therefore quickly left this world.

Many ancient religions reflect the idea of the evolutionary development of the soul through rebirth and return to Earth (Hinduism, Judaism, Buddhism, etc.). This gives rise to a different attitude towards death than in atheistic or late Christian societies.

Earlier (before the revolution) in Russia it was customary to prepare for death. Both spiritual and domestic preparation was carried out. It was customary to die at home, after completing all the affairs, saying goodbye to relatives and reaching a state of forgiveness and peace, accepting the fact of one's dying as a given. Children were also invited to the dying. They talked with him, listened to parting words and understood that death is as much a part of life as birth. At the same time, there was no such panic fear of this phenomenon.

In later forms of religions, rituals arose that evoked fear of death (mourners, black clothes, etc.). The theme of death took on an increasingly terrifying meaning. In the 60s of the 20th century, the practice of placing a dying person in a hospital arose, which deprived him of the support and support of his loved ones, moreover, doctors stopped informing the dying person about his fatal diagnosis. As a result, a person lived in the illusory hope that he would not die and he never managed to come to the state of accepting the fact of his death. The illusion of the absence of death grew in society. This illusion was transmitted to children from an early age.

Why is it important to tell your child the truth?

Even if you do not consider death as an aspect of any of the religions, then in any case, physical death is a reality. All people die sooner or later. This is an indisputable fact. Therefore, to hide this phenomenon from the child, creating the illusion that death does not exist, is to inflict serious psychological trauma on him in the future. He understands that if the topic is taboo and makes adults so worried and upset, then death is something terrible. Gradually, he begins to live under the unconscious fear of death.

Adults hide from children the fact of the death of a loved one, often out of their own selfishness - they are not ready to face the feelings of loss and grief in the baby, help him survive this and support him, because. at this time they are overcome by their own feelings.

It is noteworthy that this topic is very important for children, and it has its own age stages of development. So, at the age of 4, children begin a sensitive period in which they begin to realize the finiteness of life. At first, this understanding is connected with the awareness of the finiteness of the life of loved ones, and only then - the finiteness of one's life. If, at this age, the fact of the death of a loved one is hidden from the child or illiterately convey this information to him, then this, indeed, can become a trauma for the child for life. The fact that death is natural will be ousted from consciousness forever, and the fear of death will take its place.

Accepting this phenomenon as a given leads to the fact that the quality of life is changing. Responsibility for one's actions appears, and life is filled with a different content.

How to act correctly in this case?

First of all , an adult needs to understand and realize his own fear of death. The anguish and sense of loss of those who remain in this world are largely due to the fact that they cannot imagine their life without the deceased. Often the reason for this is by no means love, but fear for oneself, a sense of guilt before the deceased, etc. If there was not a painful dependence between close people, but a healthy attachment, they will be able to “let go” of each other. And the living will keep warm and positive from the existing relationship.

Secondly , this warmth and positive can be transmitted to the child, for example, telling him: “Grandfather died. When people die, they don't come back. But he will always be with you and will always support you.” There is no mysticism or religious background in these words. Even if you are not a believer, you can always turn to the image of the deceased in your heart, ask him about something, get an answer and support. You can teach this to your child too.
The kid does not need to hear and know all the details and facts (for example, about the course of an illness, or a car accident) - he is still very small, he cannot understand everything.

specific words

Children from whom the fact of the illness of a loved one was not hidden will perceive the information easier and the situation will be much clearer to them.
It is important to immediately explain all aspects of death to the child that may cause fear or guilt in him.

If death occurred as a result of an illness, explain that not all illnesses lead to death, so that later, when sick, the child is not afraid to die.

“My grandmother was very ill, and the doctors could not cure her. Let's remember, you were sick last month and recovered. And I was sick recently, remember? And got better too. Yes, there are diseases for which there is no cure yet, but you can grow up, become a doctor and find a cure for the most dangerous disease.

If the death occurred as a result of an accident, the fact of death should be explained without blaming anyone for it. So that the child does not have a fear of losing the remaining loved ones, you need to tell him that the rest want to live long and do not want to leave him alone.

“Yes, my mother died, but I want to live a very long time, I want to be with you all the time, I will take care of you until you grow up. Don't be afraid, you are not alone."

Adult must block the child's feelings of guilt.

“It's not your fault that your mother died. No matter how you acted, it would still happen. So let's talk about how we can live on."

Here it is appropriate to let the child understand that now is a very important moment to reassess the relationship with the remaining loved ones.

“You loved dad very much and I can’t replace him, but I will try my best to give you the same support as he did.” “You always trusted your secrets only to your mother. I can't replace her in this. But I really want you to know that you can tell me about any of your difficulties and I will help you. You are not alone, we are together."

It is important to remember that grandfather was a close person not only for you, but also for your child. Hiding the fact of his departure from the baby, you take on the right to decide how their relationship will develop further, and the relationship continues to develop even after the death of a loved one (for example, many can understand and forgive a loved one only after his departure).

Author: Candidate of Psychological Sciences, Associate Professor of the Department of Correctional Psychology and Pedagogy, Children psychologist-consultant, family psychotherapist, Montessori teacher AMI Diploma (Association Montessori International) 2.5-6+, Children's Supervisor Montessori Center"Alice" Mogilev V.N.

Should I hide from the child that someone close to me died, or should I tell him the truth? Why do children often fail to understand the value of life? How to explain to a child what death is? These questions are answered by a psychologist and a mother of many children.

It is possible and necessary to talk with a child about the loss

The theme, like the theme of birth, is of great interest to children. The age of appearance of the fear of death is 4-5 years, when the child realizes that there is death. He begins to fear that his parents will die and that he will die himself.

The fear of death may not manifest itself directly, but in hidden forms - in not letting go of the mother or in the difficulty of falling asleep, for example. The death of a pet or someone close can move to the fear of death.

It is very important, if someone close to you has died, not to hide the death, otherwise it will further increase children's fears. There is no need to say that the person is still in the hospital or has gone somewhere far away, because these answers are not true, they distort what happened, they cause a lot of fears. The fears that the child has are worse than what they actually have. It is always very difficult to tell a child the truth for non-church people, it seems to them that they are destroying something. But what a child can think of is worse. You need to tell the truth.

The child can be taken to church for a funeral service, but it is not necessary to take it to the funeral process. And if the funeral is civil, then you should think ten times, because such a funeral is a very difficult procedure, much more hopeless compared to the Orthodox rite. And it is very important, if someone close to you has died, to determine what the child can do for this person: light a candle, write a note, feed the birds, give alms...

The question of visiting the cemetery is a question that each family decides for itself. Many children - preschoolers, younger schoolchildren - have big fears after that. Vivid imagination, children's folklore, fairy tales related to the cemetery - by the sum of the factors, visiting a cemetery can be quite traumatic.

It all depends on the beliefs of the family. For believers, it is clear where the person has gone. But it seems to me that seriously unbelievers there are no people, and just the theme of death confronts a person with the fact that impossible not to believe. Everything protests against the fact that everything So will come to an end and there will be nothing after death. And the children, having a pure soul, do not agree that everything will end like this - with a flower, a cat, a butterfly. The preschooler is a believer.

It is necessary to determine the culture of mourning, the culture of mourning in the family, that is, to remember the deceased, or it is better not to talk about him at all. It is good when there is a ceremony of remembrance, framed portraits, albums with photographs, days of memory, when people gather, they say good words about a person. Then the person does not disappear anywhere, he remains here, in this family community, he is simply not around.

You can and should talk to your child about the loss. If the family is a believer, the child, of course, has a trauma, especially if it is a very close person, but there is no breakdown. The child believes that we will all meet in the next world, he can wait. We'll all meet, that's what's important.

But in the families of believers, a child may have a too dense, rich idea of \u200b\u200bheavenly life, and he may become unhappy with this life, he may want to immediately go to heaven to his grandmother or, God forbid, to his mother.

Here it is necessary, if a very close person has died, and the family is very religious, to make the description of the afterlife not so captivating. If you tell every day how good it is in paradise, how good it is for your grandmother or someone close to you, and how beautiful it is there, how nothing hurts there, the child can say: I don’t want to be here, I want to go there.

Playing with the computer when they kill

As a specialist and as a person I am a big opponent shooting games. The child thinks that although this is murder, I have four lives! As a result, the child may do something careless in real life. Really careless, believing that he seemed to have several lives left.

Even a grown child thinks so?

Yes, it's a coordinate shift. These spectacles make death something unreal, something that is not worth paying attention to. Think twenty times killed. And if you “wet” the Nazis for two hours, you will not be sensitive to this.

We must try, as long as possible, to prevent children from playing computer games where they kill. And if your out of control teenager is in the field shooting games, it is necessary to say all possible words so that he understands what threatens such a hobby.

I believe that games in which there are murders shift many of the internal coordinates of the child in the wrong direction, devalue these terrible events, and distort the boundaries of possibilities. Games with death, games with cruelty in computers and consoles make possible the growth of juvenile delinquency. If on the screen you "wet" strangers, why don't you beat some Caucasian? Where is the limit? The child does not feel the line between reality and unreality.

From virtual death to real

- Children: I'll do it out of spite, let them look?

It is very scary - child suicide. The child does not understand that he will die seriously, but thinks that he will watch from above, how, for example, everyone will cry. And it doesn't have a sense of finality because it's shifted by media stuff. It is never suicide from depression, it is from the desire to take revenge, to teach a lesson, to draw attention to yourself.

The moment of irreversibility of death is not present in the mind of the child. And because, among other things, that the parents did not say the right words on this topic in time. After all, most childhood suicides stem from a sense of reversibility: I a little I will die. But if the family has contact with children, at least some, not to say optimal, then this is unlikely to happen to the child.

- As a rule, children first voice it?

Yes. Voiced directly or indirectly. If a child finds himself in some kind of teenage community, where the ideology of death, the idealization of death, you need to be very careful, discuss some things in advance. It is especially necessary to be careful if such a tragic experience already exists in the family.

Interviewed by Amelina Tamara

Many fathers who have lost their loved ones do not know how to do it right. The child does not know that his mother has died, but still need to say? How to do this without harming the baby's psyche, or with minimal losses for her?

Here is an example from life. Increasingly, young women are dying of cancer. The mother of seven-year-old Artem is no exception. The boy lived with his grandmother in the country when his mother died. It happened just a week ago. The funeral was held without the boy, deciding that it would be better that way. Although the diagnosis was made a long time ago, Artem's mother at the family council still insisted on the need to buy an apartment by taking out a mortgage. For this reason, she worked almost to the last - she had to pay her bills. But when she got much worse, she was forced to go to the hospital. Artemka visited her in the hospital room with her dad.
Relatives did not leave the feeling that the boy guesses about the death of his mother, he does not even part with her photo, although he had never shown such a desire before. And after the news that his mother had died, the baby literally fell into a state of temporary depression: he cried for a long time and searched for the cause of her death. He then claimed that “we all brought mom because we didn’t obey her,” then he suddenly said that healthy people eat a lot of fruits, but mom didn’t have enough of them. After the funeral, it was decided to tell the baby about the loss, but how?

In each case, you need to rely on the well-being of the baby, on the state of his psyche, on specific circumstances. But still, there are some universal tips that will help alleviate the psychological consequences of this message for the baby.

A reminder for family members who need to support a child after the death of a loved one.

Remember how in childhood we were told "Cry and everything will pass." This advice is relevant in this case. The baby should cry, or rather cry. Tears relieve tension and relieve psychological suffering. A child is not able to express his grief in the same way as an adult. His sadness has a slightly different character due to the phase of psychological development and the severity of the traumatic experiences that he had to endure. Intensity and cyclicity are the main characteristics of the experiences of a preschooler. In addition, they are characterized by longevity.
It is also not worth hiding your own feelings from the child because of the death of a loved one. Let your child see that he is not alone in his experiences. From an educational point of view, one should not miss the opportunity to once again convince the baby of the worthiness of the life of a departed loved one. If your baby does not learn to experience death, then he will not be able to understand the value of life, because life and death are connected together.
Turning to religion for help in difficult times is a perfectly acceptable option for families in which it is customary to turn to God. Accepting grief with all family members will help your baby to more easily endure the pain of loss.
Neglecting the help of close relatives is not the best choice at the moment. Grandparents - that's where the storehouse of worldly wisdom and kindness. They know how to keep silent and support at the right time. Being close to people and in their environment helps the baby to more easily endure the pain of loss.
Questioning about a deceased relative by a child is not an easy step for him. If you dismiss them for a bunch of everyday activities, the baby will no longer see you as support in difficult times. Think that if the baby is ready to question you, then he trusts you, and each time the trust will decrease. Listen to him and answer all his questions, do not dismiss him until he is ready to talk to you. Know that a preschooler needs to hear your explanation several times in order to accept what happened. Awareness of the need to see off the deceased is even more important than the need to express joy from the birth of a new family member. Only the change of prosperity and decay is worth explaining the cyclical nature of life. Let your little one know about their inseparability.
Inadequate reactions of the child (unreasonable fun, laughter, high spirits) that appeared after the loss was reported should not be ignored. They can be caused by hope and expectation for the return of the mother. Moreover, these expectations can persist for a very long time. Watching the games of the baby, like nothing else, will indicate his present condition. Moreover, the psyche of the child is such that the reflection of the news of the loss on the general state can manifest itself immediately after death or after a fairly long time.
The kid should not be protected from visiting the cemetery. Caring for the mother’s grave and getting to know the graves of long-dead relatives, telling about them are all powerful educational incentives that help to bring up pride in your family and its past. The bright memory of ancestors and love for them will help to instill a sense of duty in relation to cemeteries and the need to care for them. Switching from unnecessary stress and setting yourself up in a constructive way is what your child needs right now. Ritual actions help in this very well. In addition, these actions help to consolidate the child in the opinion that he is part of the family, an important part of it. And that sharing grief among all is like partial redemption. This involvement helps to endure a bereavement, helps to teach empathy for people and teaches the ability to cherish life as the greatest value.
Involving the baby in the preparation and holding of a wake for the deceased loved one. This custom helps to express one's own respect for the deceased. Often, the awareness of the obligation of living relatives to bury the deceased occurs only through the farewell of the deceased on his last journey. Therefore, by connecting the baby to the preparation of wires, you will give him not only feasible work, but also help him calm down a little and distract himself from heavy thoughts. Have your little one help prepare the meal or choose the flowers for the goodbye, help decorate the wreath, etc.

Parents and all relatives should remember that preschoolers can already perceive death as a fact and it is not worth keeping silent about death or focusing on it in their upbringing.

Why do people have to die?

Children ask questions about death at the most inopportune moment, and it is difficult to prepare for them. Even if adults have scrolled through the answers many times in their heads, at the same time they can fall into a stupor and hesitate. Incomprehensible excuses and postponing the conversation “for later” are associated with personal fears of parents, and this is not surprising: few people want to think about death in their free time and talk about this topic.

Children are simpler, they ask a question and want to hear a specific answer to it. Therefore, it would be inappropriate to invent stories about people falling asleep for a long time or leaving somewhere, because this is not true. Decide for yourself what you believe in and share it with your child.

“Yes, all people die sometime. Like all living things on the planet, people have their own lifespan. We are all born small at first, then we grow up, study, grow up, start our own families, give birth to children, and then we no longer grow, but grow old. And when we become completely decrepit old men and it will even be difficult for us to move around, we will die. But inside our body lives the soul. This is how we feel love for our loved ones, and the soul never dies. Only the body dies, because it is worn out and old.” You may have your own version, the main thing is that you can explain this to the child in understandable words.

This may be enough to not return to this topic for a long time. But then the child may ask why some people die young, and not at all old, as you said. This question is more complicated, and you can say that we all live in a world where there are many dangers, you can get sick or get hit by a car, and as much as we would like to live to old age, sometimes trouble happens. But an illness or an accident does not necessarily end in death, this rarely happens.

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If the child is afraid of the death of a loved one

It happens that, having spoken once about the possible death of the mother or father, the child cannot let go of this topic and is seriously worried, returning to it again and again. Particularly suspicious kids with a rich imagination can acutely perceive the issue of even the hypothetical death of a loved one. With such children, it is better not to talk about difficult topics before going to bed, because the child will come up with a scary story for himself, and then he will wake up in tears from a nightmare. If your baby asks a question at bedtime, try distracting him with an answer like, “Yes, all people die, but first they live a long and happy life,” and then change the topic.

Repeat to your baby every time that you will try very hard to stay with him as long as possible, because you have so many things ahead of you! You need to get him to school, redo all the lessons with him, go to all the competitions, meet the graduation, and then you need to help him go to college, take a walk at his wedding, babysit his kids. And although it is difficult for a small child to imagine such a distant future, this will calm him down.

Even though speaking out your fear can help you fight it, talking alone isn't enough. You can invite the child to draw fear, and then destroy it - tear it, burn it, shoot it with a pistol with bullets or with the help of darts. In the end, you can kill fear with laughter - draw all sorts of funny things to this fear and laugh at its absurdity and helplessness. Of course, you can’t ask a child to draw a beloved grandfather dying, but to depict fear in the form of some kind of monster or blot is necessary. It helps a lot in dealing with fears. You can look for such activities in your city and go there with your child.

The main thing that is required from loved ones is to give the child confidence in protection and that they understand him. Do not roll your eyes in horror, do not pull the baby with the phrase “How can you think about it!”, Otherwise, he will definitely go in cycles in his fear. Talk to him calmly, as if there is nothing terrible in it. At the same time, overcome your fears, if any.

Grief happened in the family: what to do?

If a tragedy has occurred in the family and the child needs to be told about the death of the mother, father or other close relative, this should be done by the one with whom the baby has a trusting relationship.

Don't pretend like nothing happened even with good intentions. Children feel emotions without words, and if the baby feels tension, and they don’t tell him anything, it scares him: what if he did something bad?
Don't come up with explanations why all family members look confused or cry out loud. Everything has changed in the house: no one laughs, for some reason they hung towels over the mirrors in the apartment, one of the family members is constantly crying into the phone. Tell the truth. Dad didn't go on a long business trip, or grandma isn't home, not because she went on a trip around the world. If you cannot tell everything as it is now, then deprive the child of memories in order to survive the loss later. Even if he is still small, in years he will still realize what happened, and will be able to mourn.
Make contact with your child catch his eye. Be calm and look into his eyes, hold his hand. Perhaps he will remember this moment many more times, and he should feel trust and support.
Don't take your child by surprise. Choose a convenient moment for a conversation when the baby is full, slept, in a good mood, but do not talk to him in his room. He doesn't need to hear such things in his nursery. Control yourself. Do not fall into hysterics and sobs, surrendering to your grief, think about the child: you are an adult, and in front of you is a defenseless child who is left without a person close to him. The child does not know what kind of life awaits him. Which one of you is harder?
Speak clearly and understandably. There is no need to complicate the conversation with phrases like: “You see, trouble happened, your grandfather left untimely.” Speak clearly: “There was grief in the family. Grandpa is dead." Pause and then repeat: "Your beloved grandfather has died."
You must support and reassure the baby. His reaction is unpredictable: he can ask again, run away, burst into tears, start screaming or get scared. If the child wants to be alone, let him come to him later. Maybe he will not react at all, or he will suddenly invite you to play - this is normal, he is in a state of shock. Even some adults in a shock situation act strangely or as if nothing happened. The body tries to protect itself from stress.
Do not put the child in a "vacuum" protecting him from any information reminiscent of death. On the contrary, talk to him if he asks. It would be superfluous to overload the child's brain with details about heaven and hell, about God's will, otherwise the baby may hate God, who took his loved one. It is enough for him to explain that dad (mother, grandmother, grandfather) has turned into an invisible angel, will now watch him from the clouds, and sometimes can come in a dream.
Give confidence in the future, that everything will continue to happen the same way as before. Follow the regime, attend classes if the child goes somewhere. Keep taking him to kindergarten - he does not need to watch round-the-clock sobs and wails of family members. If the child begins to be afraid of the dark or fall asleep alone, be with him until he falls asleep. If things are really bad, then take him to your place for the night, but only as an exception, otherwise he will get used to sleeping with you.

Does the child need to be at the funeral?

First of all, it depends on the age. A very small child should not be present at a burial or cremation - this is a difficult process even for an adult. After 7 years, you can ask the child himself if he wants to go to the funeral, be sure to ask again a little later. If the answer is yes, then you need to decide which of the close people will take on the responsibility of being with the child all the time, without being distracted by their own emotions.

If the child himself wants to be present at the funeral, do not dissuade, but explain in advance that some pictures at the funeral may shock him and seem scary (a grave, lowering a coffin into the ground or into a crematorium oven), but this is a natural process, and now you should not worry about the deceased. He will not be there dark, cold, hot, scary or lonely, because his soul has left the body. An invisible ghost flies somewhere nearby, waiting for us to say goodbye and let him go to heaven.

After the funeral, try to return to the usual rhythm of life as soon as possible, but do not expect the child to quickly accept the absence of a beloved family member. According to psychologists, the pain of loss subsides after 8 weeks. If after this the child cannot return to normal life (he is tormented by nightmares, nocturnal enuresis, the theme of death can be traced in his games and drawings), you should contact a child psychologist.

If a pet has died

Children are strongly attached to pets that grow with them. Therefore, the death of a beloved dog, cat or even a hamster is the loss of a childhood friend. If the furry pet of the family has died, do not hide it from the child or say that he went for a walk and did not return. When an animal runs away, there is always hope that it will return home. The kid will look for him with his eyes, listen to every rustle and wait in vain for a pet.

If you cherish the memory of an animal that was part of the family, in no case can you just get rid of it. Conduct the animal with dignity. You can call a special service, a person will come to you and pick up the body. In some cities, there are organizations that take animals for cremation, and the owners can post a photo and a few kind words about the pet in the electronic cemetery. In this case, leave a note with the child, let him express his feelings - how he will miss him, how he will miss the caress of his pet. Let him understand that mourning the dead, even animals, yearning for them is absolutely normal, these tears should not be shy.

You can bury the animal yourself. Perform the ritual with the child, let him say goodbye to the pet, help to bury the grave with earth. You can put a bouquet of wild flowers on the mound. Funerals provide an opportunity to realize the transition of a being from one state to another. Here, a beloved pet was part of the family and was nearby, and now the house is empty. He remained there, in the earth, and this cannot be changed in any way.

Children's books on an adult theme

Some children don't ask questions about death, but that doesn't mean they don't think about it. A child may not ask about it for various reasons either at 5 or at 7 years old, but he will still find the answer. Modern cartoons, programs, games distort children's understanding of the nature of many things, so it is better for parents to take care of what their child is watching and reading.

Here are books that you can read with your child or give him to read on his own. Some of them may seem strange, frightening, and sometimes even cynical. This is the view of an adult who already knows too much about life and death. Children think differently, so the following literature is suitable for them:

"A Star Called Ajax", W. Stark, S. Virsen. A touching story about a boy who had to endure the death of a friend - his beloved dog. A book that should be read even for those who do not have pets, because it is not about death, but about love. About love after death, about eternal memory and about the fact that love helps to survive everything.
"How Grandpa Became a Ghost", K. F. Okeson, E. Erickson. A warm and sad story about a boy whose beloved grandfather died, but came to him in the form of a ghost. The book is situational, has a therapeutic effect, it is suitable for children who have begun to ask their parents about death.
“And Grandpa in a suit?”, A. Fried, J. Gleich. A slightly dark but very honest funeral book. A little boy is experiencing the death of his grandfather, but his relatives hide the truth from him and say that he will not understand anything yet.
"The kindest in the world", W. Nilson, E. Erickson. A book about death, written in children's language, with the naivete inherent in children. A story about children who jokingly decided to play funeral parlor and bury all the animals they found, and then the realization of the real loss of a pet came to them.
"The Book of Death", P. Stalfelt. A book that causes a lot of controversy among parents, so it's up to you to decide whether it is suitable for your child or not. Illustrations about death and funerals that not everyone will like.

If books about death seem too frank and you don’t want to discuss this topic in pictures, then read stories, fairy tales and stories to your child that make him think and find a response, for example:

"Whatever happens", D. Gliori. This book is suitable for the smallest, it is not about death at all, but about love. About the eternal love of parents for their children, which will not fade away even when they are gone.
"Girl with matches", "Chamomile", G.-Kh. Anderson. Sad stories for children about children.
"Sadako and a Thousand Paper Cranes", E. Corr. The book is about a little Japanese girl who was struck by radiation sickness after the bombing of Hiroshima and Nagasaki. The book is suitable for younger students.

Do not refuse the child to talk about death if he asks, and even more so if the loss of a loved one happened in the family. Do not tell him: “You still won’t understand anything,” - you can’t leave the baby alone with yourself and the unknown. Even if he is silent, does not ask, he still feels the mood of his loved ones and the tense atmosphere in the family.