What is called when the other person felt. supernatural human abilities

Who among us has not adopted the feelings of a loved one during a heart-to-heart conversation. The ability to adapt to the mood and emotional state of the interlocutor is an important feature of the socialization of the individual. This feeling is called empathy.

Definition

Empathy is a conscious empathy with the emotional state of a person while maintaining an understanding of the external origin of the source of feeling. In simple terms, the phenomenon under consideration can be explained as the ability to understand and feel other people's emotions, to enter into the position of another.

The term is of Greek origin. The meaning of the word empathy can be translated from it as "in suffering, feelings, passions." The term was introduced into modern scientific circulation by the experimental psychologist E.B. Titchener at the end of the 19th century.

Sigmund Freud at the beginning of the 20th century characterized empathy as a process of assessing the patient's mental state, projecting this state onto oneself, an attempt to understand these emotions and feelings through comparison with one's own feelings. Its main feature is the absence of involvement in any emotion, as happens with compassion.

Main types and levels

Types of empathy in psychology:

Emotional. This type is based on mechanical projection and imitation of the interlocutor's motor and affective reactions. Mechanical projection is a psychological defense mechanism in which internal feelings are perceived as coming from outside. It manifests itself in the form of attributing one's feelings and emotions to the interlocutor with the conviction that this feeling comes from external influences, and not from within. Motor reactions are understood as small motor operations that accompany action, communication. An affective reaction is a violent emotional action, a sharp change in state.
Cognitive. This controlled empathy is based on processes of an intellectual nature: comparison, analogy, opposition.
Predicative. Empathy, which consists in the ability to predict the affective reactions of the interlocutor.

There are several special forms of empathic behavior:

empathy - identification of the emotional feelings of the interlocutor;
sympathy (compassion) is a form of expressing a state in response to the experiences of another person.

Psychological levels of empathy:

High (third). Increased empathy is manifested in the fact that a person deeply empathizes with the state of others. Often such inclusion is on the verge of losing control. It occurs quite rarely.
Medium (second). The level at which a person has the ability to control empathy, but puts his own feelings in the first place. Average empathy is typical for most modern people. Other people's feelings and emotions do not matter for their lives. The main thing is the process of action, and not the emotional overtones of these actions.
Low (first). The level is characterized by indifference, indifference to the state of other people. Such people usually have problems with socialization, they are unsociable, lead a reclusive lifestyle, they have no friends and relatives.

Separately, it is worth mentioning a group of people who use controlled empathy for professional purposes (doctors, teachers, actors, writers, employees of special government services, etc.). Such people tend to develop controlled empathy in order to achieve professional goals.

Empathy, sympathy and reflection

For a deeper understanding of the phenomenon of controlled empathy, it is necessary to define the processes closely related to it.

Compassion is an integral element of empathy, manifested in the expression of one's attitude to the suffering of another person.

Identification is a conscious psychological and emotional behavior, which manifests itself in the complete identification of oneself with the state of another person, a group of people. It is often a psychological defense mechanism in adverse conditions.

Reflection is awareness of oneself, one's consciousness. It manifests itself in values, motives, interests, worldview, behavioral patterns, thinking, emotional response. All these personal structures are formed due to the awareness of actions, their rethinking and structuring.

In simple words, reflection is not just a person's knowledge of something, but knowledge about this knowledge. Such a definition of the phenomenon was given by the famous philosopher and theologian P.T. de Chardin. In the context of the problem under consideration, reflection differs from empathy in that a person completely dissolves in the problem, the feelings of the interlocutor, leaving no room for one's own Self. Empathy maintains a clear distinction between controlled empathy and one's own feelings.

Manifestations in life

The phenomenon under consideration plays a significant role in the life of every person. It manifests itself in various fields of activity.

Medical assessment

In medicine, empathy is understood as the meaning of the psychological term "empathic listening". The latter term means understanding the emotional state of the interlocutor and demonstrating this understanding. It often manifests itself when a patient is interviewed by a doctor. The doctor, using the empathic mechanism, understands the patient's condition, and the latter sees it in the doctor's behavior and emotions.

In medicine, empathy helps to obtain the most objective information about the feelings and thoughts of the patient. Feeling understanding, people open up, express feelings more vividly, talk about the state in detail and sincerely.

The ability to empathize to varying degrees is inherent in all healthy people..

Psychological assessment

What is empathy in psychology: the normal emotional state of a person in appropriate situations. There are several methods for determining its level. Procedures have been created to capture individual manifestations of this ability.

When characterizing the psychological aspects of empathy, it is noted that the understanding of the external origin of the state is preserved, that is, an empathic person is clearly aware that his partner's feelings are reflected on him. If this does not happen, the state is referred to as identification with the interlocutor.

An empathetic person clearly distinguishes between his inner, personal feelings and sensations that arise in response to the emotions of the interlocutor. Such perception allows you to actively use empathy for a greater disclosure of the experience, the patient's internal state.

Pedagogical assessment

Empathy is a key aspect of socialization, so pedagogy pays great attention to its development. The key problem of the modern educational process is the lack of established, trusting, respectful relationships between teachers and students. And the responsibility lies with an adult - a teacher. Teachers do not know how to take the position of their students in order to understand the problems. Lack of understanding affects all levels: intellectual, emotional and social.

School is not only a tool for transferring basic knowledge to young people, but also an institution for the formation of a personality that must adapt to a full life in society. Without empathy, this cannot be achieved, so the teacher should, by example, develop conscious empathy in children.

Scientific assessment

From the point of view of physiology, empathy is perceived as the ability to reflect the action and state of other beings through the activation of special mirror neurons. It is known that areas of the amygdala and the cerebral cortex are responsible for the feeling of empathy. People with damage to these areas are incapable of controlled empathy, do not capture the emotions and feelings of other people in the process of communication.

Empathy and art

The importance of empathy in art is difficult to overestimate. Empathy is important everywhere: in music, painting, writing, theater and cinematography. For those who create and create, controlled empathy allows you to create masterpieces. The composer captures the moods of the surrounding world, people and creates an appropriate piece of music. The writer plunges into the world of the heroes of his works in order to convey the mood in the story. Theater and film actors understand the inner state of their character.

Equally important is empathy for the viewer. Empathy allows you to isolate the mood of the music from a set of sounds. An empathic person feels the feelings of the characters in stories, plays and films. Such people are able to empathize, but they understand the staging of the ongoing action.

Characteristic

Empathy is inherent in all healthy people, so it is neutral. But the depth of manifestation of states of controlled empathy can be positive or negative. Everything depends on the situation.

The manifestation of empathy is carried out due to various signals:

deeds;
speech;
facial expressions;
gestures.

pros

Empathy is necessary for full socialization. The feeling of controlled empathy is formed in childhood, when the child sees the involvement of an adult, parent or other relative in his state. This behavior is being adopted. Empathic states make it easier to find a common language, feel involved in the life of the family, community, people around, country, nation.

The possession of empathy brings significant benefits in the profession. The ability to adapt to the state of the interlocutor is important in negotiations, professional sales, networking and contacts.

Minuses

A high level of empathy often has a negative impact on the bearer of this feeling. Thus, it was noted that acute empathy increases the likelihood of developing depressive processes, stress, mental disorders and phobias.

A low level of empathy significantly complicates life in the social sphere. People who have an underestimated level of it, more often than others, face problems in communication, building close relationships.

Definition of an empath

Who is an empath: he has a developed ability for conscious empathy, usually referred to as an empath. Often in conversations you can hear the word empant. This pronunciation is wrong, the correct concept sounds different.

Main features

Empathic abilities are closely related to the level of human development. The higher the spiritual and intellectual level, the higher the ability to express controlled compassion.

Characteristics of an empath:

intuitive understanding of the feelings and sensations of another;
the ability to sincerely empathize;
the ability to easily take the place of another;
the ability to abstract, to look at the situation from the outside;
the ability to understand and accept someone else's point of view without evidence, argumentation and disputes.

Personal testing

In psychology, there are several special questionnaires for determining empathy. One of the most elaborated is the test compiled by clinical psychologist S. Baron-Cohen.

There is another simple and popular way to help assess the level of empathy - the scale of emotional response. The technique was developed by a psychologist from the USA A. Megrabyan:

it consists of twenty-five questions;
each item of the test involves the choice of 1 of 4 answers;
each of the four options is assigned a certain number of points;
based on the amount, a person's ability to control empathy is determined.

Another test was developed by the domestic teacher V.V. Boyko. It allows you to assess the level of personal empathy. Boyko's test, in contrast to the emotional response scale, is simpler, but it is superficial, i.e., the accuracy and reliability of its results are lower. The technique contains thirty-six questions that must be answered "yes" or "no". The Boyko test is aimed at determining predispositions to emotional empathy.

Empathy Management

Empathy is an important sensory aspect of everyday life. Its development and ability to control allows you to qualitatively change life for the better, the ability to understand another person is the main step towards building healthy, positive relationships. Controlling the state of another person makes it possible to catch conflict situations and avoid them.

How to develop empathy? To do this, there are various systems, methods and exercises.

Empathy exercises:

Concentration is not on your own conclusions, but on the meaning of the phrases and words of the interlocutor in the dialogue. The ability to listen and hear will allow you to better understand people when communicating.
Concentration of attention on people around, colleagues, acquaintances, relatives. How do they live, what are their interests, problems, successes.
Conversations with strangers in transport, on the street. Communicating with people outside your circle will help you better understand the lives of others.
Playing the situation of the interlocutor on oneself, building a line of behavior, working out emotional manifestations.
Analysis of their feelings and experiences in various situations, their memorization. The development of emotional memory will allow you to quickly project the situation onto another and better understand him.

Empathy does not always play a positive role in life. Many people tend to reduce their empathy for others. To do this, you need to focus on yourself, constantly occupy yourself with hobbies, new hobbies. Constant concentration will not leave time for the manifestation of specific states. When developing empathy, remember that a high level of empathy has negative consequences.

Do you perceive other people very closely, as if they were your own? Perhaps you have awakened empathy! Find out how to test it!

What is empathy and how does it arise?

Empathy (empathy)¹ - the ability to subtly feel the emotions of another as your own. People who can do this are called empaths. An empath is someone who feels the emotions and feelings of others. Sometimes empathy is accompanied by ability.

People naturally acquire this ability in two ways:

1. They are born empaths.

2. This gift awakens on its own during maturation and socialization.

Empathy is a great gift if you know how to use it properly. Not all empaths are able to control the ability consciously - in most cases this happens unconsciously.

Many people sometimes "catch" the sensations of other people. In most cases, the gift of empathy is not recognized: such manifestations are explained by the logical mind as ordinary psychology or spontaneous NLP².

Signs of having superpowers

If this happened in your life and you suddenly felt emotions unusual for yourself, it is quite possible that it was a feeling received from another person - empathy manifests itself!

Until you learn to manage and control it, you will absorb other people's emotions and experience them as your own.

There are several signs that a person is an empath:

1. Empaths feel the suffering in the world on a massive scale and want to do something to help the world.

2. They find it difficult to look at someone else's pain because it feels like their own.

3. People with this ability have a hard time watching disturbing news: they feel all the suffering and then can’t for a very long time recover.

For example, it is enough to watch a news report about a disaster or some kind of catastrophe anywhere in the world, and such a person can feel pain (psychological, and sometimes physical) from this event.

4. Empaths have a hard time finding themselves and being fully aware of their own feelings.

For example, during a conversation with another person, people with the gift of empathyfeel his emotions and feelings. Often, they know the answers to their life questions, but at the same time they do not find the answer to their own.

5. Often empathy can make a person shy because he knows very well how the other feels and what he wants.

6. If a person does not know how to control his ability, he may lose critical perception. Such people always say “yes” to all requests and demands, without thinking about whether they need it, whether they really want it.

An empath becomes so immersed in the other person's experience, knowing what they need, that they can't say no. And only then he realizes that he did not think about himself and his desires.

7. People with empathy help others at their own expense.

8. Empaths love from a distance, just as if they were close by.

9. They feel a deep affinity with nature, animals and plants.

Such people are able to feel not only people, but also animals, for example, meeting a dog or a cat along the street.

10. An empath feels responsible for how other people feel and tries to help them feel better.

11. Such people are very sensitive: relationships and friendships can be taken too close to the heart.

12. Because of empathy and the inability to manage it, they often become an outlet for other people to dump their emotions on them.

13. While reading a book or watching a movie, an empath experiences events very emotionally, almost completely identifies with the characters.

14. Due to the constant workload, people with this gift forget what it is to have fun and enjoy life.

15. Empaths tend to be deeply spiritual people: the gift of empathyallows you to feel the unity of all being.

If many of the above signs are close to you, it means that the ability to empathize lives in you!

Answer the following questions:

Can you control this gift?
Are you able to share your own and others' experiences?
Are you able to manage your gift, "turning on" it only when you need it?

If you answered yes, then you yourself have learned to control your gift of empathy; otherwise, you need to learn how to manage empathy: in the notes to this article there is a link to useful material on developing control over empathy.

Notes and feature articles for a deeper understanding of the material

¹ Empathy - conscious empathy with the current emotional state of another person without losing a sense of the external origin of this experience (Wikipedia).

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It is very important for a person to become happy, to live surrounded by loving and understanding people. In order to feel the harmony and happiness of life, you need to be able to sympathize, understand other people. The amazing feeling that this opportunity gives is called empathy.

Explaining what empathy is, the definition of this gift can be given, armed with knowledge of the Greek language. In Greek, "empathy" means "compassion, empathy." In simple terms, an empathic person subtly perceives the feelings and emotions of others, he knows how to deeply sympathize with people. At the same time, the empath does not lose control over his own feelings.

Empathy - the ability to feel others

Empathy is a unique ability, it is not given to every person. For the first time this term was introduced into scientific use by the famous psychotherapist Edward Titchner. Scientists have developed a scale for determining the level of empathy in people, the principles of its classification. His developments are also used in modern psychology.

According to psychologists, now the urgent problem of modern society is a strong lack of the ability to empathize. Leading psychologist Douglas Labier even coined the definition of EDE (Empathy Deficiency Syndrome).

This magical ability has many classifications and types. Empathy can exist in a pure (classical) form, or it can include various additional aspects.

Emotions of others as if they were your own

Empathy is the ability of a person to subtly perceive other people's troubles. She never found a rational explanation. Empathic perception does not depend on the intellectual level, education of a person. Most scientists are inclined to believe that empathy is an ability transmitted at the gene level.

What is empathy

This skill is an important addition to the professional activities of many specialists:

psychoanalysts get a complete picture of the mental and emotional state of the patient;
for psychologists, empathy is an important lever for understanding the interlocutor and accurately identifying problematic states;
for criminalists, such a gift helps to collect bit by bit the slightest nuances about the thoughts and feelings of the victim/criminal;
doctors can assess how ready the patient is for medical manipulations and how effectively the patient responds to treatment;

Empathy is considered not only important, but also a necessary quality for people. This is especially true for those whose work activity is directly related to communication: teachers, educators, managers, agents, leaders, sellers, cosmetologists, stylists.

How empathy is born

It is possible to notice that a person subtly perceives the feelings of others already in early childhood. Little Empaths:

They react too actively to any manifestation of parental emotions. To quarrels, the increased timbre of the voice answers with crying.
Somatic problems also appear: the baby's face turns red, the heart begins to beat more often, and there is increased sweating.

Scientists note that empathic babies are more likely to appear in families where parents show great attention to the feelings of other people. Innate empathy can fade over time or become stronger and clearer. A warm, trusting atmosphere in the family, competent upbringing based on caring for others helps to strengthen the ability to feel.

What does the ability to empathize depend on?

Empathy in psychology is a complex science based on the primary sincere disposition towards the interlocutor, the desire to understand and listen to him. The empathic gift is also influenced by a number of other personal qualities (character, level of education, intelligence):

Such qualities as pedantry, severity, dryness interfere with the full manifestation of empathic abilities.
If a person has egocentrism (focusing attention on his own person), empathy is unfamiliar to him.
An insufficiently high level of intelligence prevents the empath from adequately assessing the situation. Such a person will incorrectly justify the feelings of the interlocutor.

More often, individuals with a high threshold of intellectual and spiritual development are prone to manifestations of true, deep empathy. Such people are able to closely contact with the emotions of others, passing them through themselves. They are intuitively aware of the thoughts that torment their interlocutors, and adequately assess the emotional states of their opponents.

In addition to the ability to empathize and subtly feel the emotions of others, empaths can also vividly perceive exciting situations from books, films, and theatrical productions.

Is it good to be an empath?

Having learned what empathy is, many people seek to develop such abilities in themselves. But do not rush into the pool with your head. Empathy is an important skill, but it needs to be used wisely. Many possessors of the gift are tormented by it. After all, it is extremely important for empaths to have a strong will and a strong, mature character. Otherwise, coping with the influx of other people's emotions becomes an impossible task.

After all, in addition to invaluable advantages:

the ability to help family and friends;
resolution of any conflict situations;
impossibility to be deceived and to be deceived;
excellent prospects for professionalism.

Empathy also has negative sides, the other side of the coin. The disadvantages of this ability include:

frequent feeling of emptiness;
the risk of developing mental disorders;
rapid emotional "burnout";
lack of reciprocity, which adds unnecessary experiences;
a heightened perception of moral pain that empaths cannot resist.

Features of the manifestation of empathic inclinations are individual. They depend on the level and type of gift to which a certain person is inclined.

Types of empathic abilities

Among specialists there is a developed classification that defines the categories, forms and degrees of empathic abilities. The gradation was developed by Carl Ransome Rogers (American educator and psychologist).

The main categories of empathy

Categories of empathy

According to psychological classification, the empathic gift is divided into three types:

emotional. An emotionally empathic person is a person who perceives other people's experiences very closely. They literally pass them through themselves, taking the pain of the interlocutor as their own. At any moment they respond to the misfortune of outsiders and always come to the rescue.

Emotional empathy is the most common, and it is on it that friendly and understanding relationships are built.

cognitive. The gift of this level is based on the ability to analyze the information received. Cognitive empaths first conduct a comparative characterization, analyzing their own thoughts and the thoughts of opponents.

Such people not only subtly perceive and feel the emotions of the interlocutors, but also connect their own intellect in order to thoroughly analyze the events. Their important task is to realize and fully understand. This kind of empathy is observed in scientific disputes and discussions.

Predicative. "Predicate" means "some statement about a certain subject." This level of empathic ability is based on the ability to predict the behavior and feelings of opponents on an intuitive level. Such manifestations are more vividly observed in any conflict situations and quarrels. A predicative empath is able to put himself in the place of the interlocutor and understand his experiences “from the inside”, not contemplating, but penetrating deep into.

All categories of empathic abilities are observed in every person, to one degree or another. The level of their development depends on the nature of the personality, temperamental characteristics and the development of brain activity.

Forms of Empathic Ability

In empaths, psychologists also distinguish between two separate types of empathic state:

Sympathy. An ability that is formed on the appearance of a personal sensual attitude to an event that happens to an opponent.
Empathy. Empathic empathy is based on the emergence of persistent emotions in the empath, the same that the interlocutor experiences.

How different forms of empathy manifest themselves can be understood by observing the reaction of the empath. For example, if during a conversation an opponent begins to worry to tears, provoking response tears in an empath, this is the ability to empathize.

With sympathy, the empathic person begins to show his own sound emotions similar to those experienced by the interlocutor.

Levels of empathy development

Among psychologists, there are certain tests that help to identify the degree of development of empathic abilities. There are four of these levels:

High (affective). This level is characterized by an increased ability to fully penetrate and feel the feelings of others. The empath "gets used" to the opponent's problems to such an extent that he ceases to distinguish between his own misfortunes and those of others.

If an empath does not have a strong enough, tough character, affective empathy can provoke problems for him mentally and personally.

Such personalities often suffer from overdeveloped impressionability, vulnerability. They have a superfine mental organization. If empaths are able to cope with the streams of other people's troubles, they achieve high skill in the professional field.

The main rule of empathy

elevated. Empaths of this level of development perceive someone else's pain and emotions without much harm to themselves. They show a sincere interest in the problems of the interlocutor, but keep a certain delicate distance. Such personalities are communicative, social, they easily find a common language with any person.

Normal. The most common level of empathic ability. It is manifested by a good, innate gift for understanding the problems of strangers. Such a person is not indifferent to other people's troubles and is responsive to help. Increased participation in troubles and problems on the part of an empath falls on close and dear people, rather than outsiders.

Short. There are people who have a complete lack of empathy. These individuals are also called "anti-empaths". They do not differ in flexible thinking and are not able to look at the problem from the outside. Nothing will force them to accept the opponent's position if it differs from their own.

Anti-empaths are completely focused on personal life and problems, they experience some discomfort among outsiders. These are bright egocentric introverts with a narrow circle of communication and pronounced problems in the ability to communicate with others.

How to become an empath

Is it possible to develop innate empathic abilities? According to psychologists, empathy can be trained and improved (subject to the presence of such a gift). Various trainings and specially designed exercises for the development of mindfulness will help with this..

How to develop empathy

Artistic sketches are especially good helpers in training empathic abilities. These include:

training for memorizing faces;
exercise on the ability to look at yourself from the side;
reincarnation in other people, animals, birds, insects.

Associative games, dancing, watching good exciting films, listening to music contribute to the development of empathy. Develop your own emotionality, along with it will come empathy. But before you become an empath, determine for yourself whether you really need this ability and whether you can control it.

Empathy is an important ability to facilitate communication and understanding. Many people strive to live happily with those who understand, appreciate and love them. To feel harmony and pleasure from existence, it is necessary to be able to sympathize and understand others.

Concept in psychology

Empathy is a very rare ability, which is manifested by a subtle understanding of the feelings and emotions of another. It includes additional aspects:

a chance to feel in the place of another;
the desire for empathy and feeling the mood of another.

These traits show the character of the personality to a greater extent than its psychological state. Empathy in psychology has been considered by scientists for more than a decade.

They argue that this ability has not only a subjective understanding of the outside world, but also the ability to feel the negative and positive emotions of the interlocutor.

Character traits

Empathic abilities manifest as sincere attention to another person. An empathic person is interested in the emotional state, problems, worries of the interlocutor.

The ability to empathize depends to a greater extent on the character, level of intelligence and emotional energy of the individual.
The person believes that she has this gift, but she thinks and perceives the world a little differently. If she pays attention only to herself, then there is no way to penetrate very deeply into the thoughts and feelings of other people.
If the intellect is not sufficiently developed, then the individual will draw conclusions that are incorrectly formed and not fully stipulate them.
Abilities can be badly dispelled if an empathic personality has emotional dryness.

It is worth noting that basically those who have a sense of empathy are considered people with a high level of spiritual and intellectual development.

The concept of empathy is manifested in the following states:

understanding the feelings and states of people on an intuitive level;
experiencing sensations similar to those felt by the interlocutor;
the ability to put on the image of others;
the skill of taking on an outside point of view without barriers;
analysis of the situation by another individual.

In addition to the fact that empathic people live with the experiences of their loved ones and acquaintances, they can show a high level of empathy towards the heroes of films and literary works. Each skill can be expressed in different ways: for someone to a greater extent, and for someone to a lesser extent. The important points of this ability depend on which type of empathy the person is more related to.

Varieties

There has been strong interest in the development of empathy among psychologists, psychotherapists and psychoanalysts. Special therapy in psychology is called "client-centered" and is based on empathy. According to this principle, the specialist works with the patient. He approaches this state as the ability to put on shoes and feel the person's coordinate system from the inside. Psychologists distinguish 3 types of empathy.

emotional type. People who are disposed to this feeling follow the emotions of the interlocutor and feel the pain and difficulties that he experiences. They are ready at any moment to react to his experiences.
cognitive type. The gift is manifested in the ability to compare and evaluate thoughts that haunt the interlocutor. In simple words, an empath not only understands the feelings of his opponent, but also turns on his mental abilities to fully examine what is happening.
predictive type. It makes it possible to guess and feel the mood of a person in certain life situations. The ability is clearly manifested at the time of quarrels and conflicts.

There are 2 separate forms of empathy definition.

Empathy, which is manifested in the feeling of the same emotions as the interlocutor.
Sympathy can be expressed in the appearance of one's own feelings about the situation in which the opponent is staying.

If in communication with a colleague the latter begins to cry, then with empathy, a person with a gift will also have tears in his eyes. With sympathy, a person will begin to support a colleague and show him personal emotions.

The level of empathy

Abilities are divided into levels of empathy, of which there are 4.

The level of empathy is increased. It is expressed by the ability to understand the problems of others.
The individual no longer divides problems into his own and others', so his personal life suffers greatly. Such individuals feel an unjustified sense of guilt, often cry because of vulnerability and impressionability. Many psychologists consider this level of empathy to be affective. People who know how to control feelings and show them only when necessary use the gift in their professional activities. They become good specialists in the field of psychology and other areas that are related to communication.

The level is high - they understand the feelings and emotions of others, do not harm themselves. These individuals treat their friends and relatives with great interest and exercise caution. They get along well with strangers, are passionate about social life. It happens that a person with a high characteristic of empathy wants to get approval and support from strangers, and if he does not receive this, he loses his temper.
The level of empathy is normal. Almost everyone has this degree.
It is manifested by sympathy and indifference towards others. Understanding and support - only for close people.
Low level. Such individuals are called anti-empaths. They do not want to pay attention to other people's problems, and also take a position that is not their own. An individual with a low level of empathy is focused only on his difficulties and problems, feels discomfort in communicating with strangers. Because of this, he has few or no friends.

Manifestation of abilities

It is possible to recognize the ability of empathy in a person even at an early age. Such children take seriously the problems that their parents face. They begin to cry after they hear a raised tone, a quarrel. Their heart beats faster, their face reddens and sweating increases. However, it is impossible to say for sure that this ability arises from birth, since there is no evidence.

Empathic children are born to sensitive parents. They are too close to experience other people's problems. If a child was born with a gift, then he may eventually develop empathic communication or, on the contrary, lose it. Strengthening the gift is facilitated by a warm homely atmosphere, a clear example from parents that you need to help people, worry about them and put yourself in their place.

Advantages and disadvantages

After learning what the word empathy means, some begin to try to master the abilities of the gift and develop it in their children. Often such people do not know how to use it correctly. This minus of the psyche can cause discomfort to a person. To cope with various negative thoughts of outsiders, you need to have a strong character and mind, so if an individual decides to develop empathy, it is worth knowing not only the pros of the gift, but also the cons.

The positives include:

good prospects for career growth;
prompt assistance to relatives and friends;
inadmissibility to be deceived;
a chance to avoid quarrels - to extinguish conflicts.

The negative aspects include:

fast emotional burnout;
a tendency to worry;
the likelihood of developing psychological disorders;
in the sphere of human relations, there is a risk that the situation will develop according to the “one-sided game” plan;
it happens that there is no mutual understanding on the part of others;
increased sensitivity makes it very easy for outsiders to harm the empath, and they themselves cannot resist this.

Ability Development

The ability of a person to empathize fascinates many and they want to develop empathy. Experts say it's possible. They recommend a few play sessions.

Exercises for the development of empathy consist of 4 aspects.

Active listening. You need to learn to listen to your interlocutor. During the conversation, the empath should ask questions that would help to fully understand the topic under discussion. You can start sharing your own impressions of what you heard.
The development of empathy includes an exercise called "Refuge". To start doing it, you need to sit comfortably in a chair, relax, close your eyes. Think about yourself, imagine your personal shelter: its size, shape, etc. Many people choose a house where their parents live, and someone likes a house in the forest, away from everyone. Such thoughts will help relieve emotional stress and remove excess burden.
Saying compliments helps increase empathy. You need to learn to praise people - this fact is important and is present in many trainings. You can start with a couple of compliments a day, soon it will become a habit and a person will look for real reasons to praise someone.
The development of empathy includes an assessment of one's own behavior, often low self-esteem. Many people think that this is just a reflex, and someone is an effective analysis of real actions. To do this, you can start keeping a diary or every day for a few minutes talking to yourself.

It is important to take into account that the older the person, the more difficult the development is, because of the experience experienced, one can bias others.

It is important to know that the ability can be easily killed by simple fear. Almost every person with a gift avoids conflict situations, he protects himself and other people from swearing and disputes. But, if this does not work out, the empath begins to suffer greatly from panic attacks and look for methods to correct his thinking, after which empathy is underestimated or completely disappears.

It is worth learning to manage yourself. Be able to close from negative emotions or filter their perception. It is necessary to clearly program what can be passed through oneself and what cannot. The individual with the gift must find a reliable method for releasing other people's bad emotions.

It is important to be able to replace empathy with non-empathic sympathy.

Show the ability to control emotions and show love, care and kindness in a more restrained form, after which a person will learn to feel the interlocutor, and not hurt him.

Conclusion

The word "empathy" means the ability of a person to experience the moments of life as emotionally as his interlocutor. He feels his opponent's mood, problems and excitement. This ability can appear at birth or develop throughout life. The main thing that an empath needs to do is learn to control thoughts and feelings, and then he will be able to use his gift positively and achieve a lot in life.

How to empathize with people and at the same time not destroy yourself? Is it really possible to learn compassion? Tatyana Karyagina - Candidate of Psychological Sciences, Senior Researcher at the Laboratory of Counseling Psychology and Psychotherapy of the Psychological Institute of the Russian Academy of Education, tells everything about empathy - about its light and dark sides.

Tatyana Karyagina

Tatyana Karyagina,Candidate of Psychological Sciences, Senior Researcher at the Laboratory of Counseling Psychology and Psychotherapy of the Psychological Institute of the Russian Academy of Education, member of the Association of Understanding Psychotherapy.

What is empathy

The word "empathy" is a little over a hundred years old - an American psychologist, one of the leaders in psychology of that time, Edward Titchener specially designed it by analogy with "sympathy" in order to translate the German word Einfühlung into English (literally "feeling" in Russian). So what is empathy? Empathy is our response to the condition and feelings of another person. This response includes both an understanding of what is happening to him, and our reciprocal feelings, thoughts and actions. Empathy is most easily triggered when we observe another person experiencing strong emotions. But this is by no means the only mechanism of its occurrence. For example, when we empathize with the heroes of a book or a documentary, we also show empathy - this is our getting used to, albeit in the fictional world of a literary hero. We can also empathize not only with a person who is already experiencing a strong feeling, but also with someone who shares his thoughts or problems with us - in such situations we try to understand the speaker's position, his motives and difficulties.

Most often, we are talking about empathy specifically in relation to a person experiencing negative emotions and states - this feeling to a large extent explains our desire to help him. Nevertheless, the ability to share with a loved one his joy, inspiration and happiness is also very important. This is necessary to establish true intimacy. To be truly close, to be together.

Empathy is an attempt to put yourself in the place of another person, an attempt to understand what it is like to be in his state and in his subjective world.

On social media, the word “empath” comes up periodically as a designation for a person experiencing empathy, but I don’t like this label. The fact is that "empath", as well as "telepath" or "psychopath", hints at the peculiarity, exclusivity of a person, and empathy, on the contrary, is a universal human ability that everyone has. But like any ability, it is developed in different people in different ways: some have more, some have less; someone better gets used to the state of another person, and someone almost “automatically” sympathizes and cares about the feelings of others, without trying to delve into the details.

In some situations, involuntary sympathy is quite enough, while in others, on the contrary, you need to undertake a whole empathic "research" - to use imagination, your own knowledge and memories for this.

Now, for example, they write a lot about the fact that people with psychopathy are deprived of empathy. But it is not so. According to the latest neuropsychological studies, indeed, the work of the brain regions responsible for the ability to involuntary empathy is disrupted in such diseases, but if patients are given instructions on conscious empathy, they will turn out to be quite capable of it - however, due to other, intact mechanisms. But apparently, due to congenital problems with involuntary empathy, from childhood, in principle, they do not develop a tendency to it.

Can Empathy Be Learned?

Like any human ability, empathy has an innate biological basis. Now quite a lot of data has been collected about how animals “worry” about their relatives and how they help them - empathy in this case has a positive effect on the survival of the species. According to recent studies, in the course of evolution, a neurophysiological mechanism of empathy has developed - when we observe a certain state in another person, the same neural networks are activated in our nervous system that are excited when we ourselves experience a similar state. Scientists talk about the mirror principle of the brain. The earliest empathic reaction is the crying of an infant in response to the crying of another infant. Moreover, scientists have proven that it is different from crying caused by third-party noise or recording your own crying. This is the most direct, immediate result of the action of mirror networks - the infant in a certain way feels the distress of another child, "expressed" by crying, and expresses empathy in the only way available to him.

So the development of empathy is the "mastery" of our natural ability. Biological empathy is primarily aimed at “our own”, those who are similar to us, but in the course of life we learn to empathize with those who are different from us and who are basically unpleasant to us. The immediate reaction is often referred to as "emotional contagion", which is difficult to resist in some situations (for example, it is difficult for fans to cope with emotions both when their favorite team wins and loses). But human culture has developed norms and rules that help regulate empathy, and we learn to do this as we develop and learn.

Empathy can certainly be developed. For a small child, it is first of all important to learn to recognize the feelings of others. That is why it is necessary to talk about feelings, and people's behavior - both in life and in books, movies - to explain. However, it is even more important to give the child the opportunity to experience and express feelings such as sadness, grief and anger. In no case should they be suppressed, let alone banned. After all, how then can a person learn to understand someone else's trouble and sympathize with him? It is important to help the child understand and safely express his feelings and at the same time teach him to take into account the conditions and needs of other people (active listening skills, described, for example, in Yulia Borisovna Gippenreiter’s book “Communicate with a child. How?”) .

Research shows that empathy is intimately linked—almost intertwined—with how a person handles their feelings. The better we understand ourselves, the better we understand others and the more compassionate we are. And vice versa.

Another way to develop empathy is related to what psychologists call the development of decentration - the ability to take a different position or a different point of view. Now special children's programs are being actively developed, which include exercises such as “tell the story from the perspective of another character” or “imagine what the old teapot would tell”. Such tasks are aimed not just at developing the imagination, but specifically at the ability to take the place of another and see the world through his eyes.

How not to "burn out" from compassion

The "empathic" problems of adults can most often be expressed by two questions:

How to express your sympathy in difficult, critical situations for other people?
How to counter what is called compassion burnout?

In fact, both of these issues are related to the regulation of empathy. We inevitably try to “filter” information, and our inability to empathize with everyone and the desire to avoid situations that we feel might become unbearable for us is completely natural. Here it is important to stay in touch with your feelings, realize their meaning, understand your motives and at the same time not lose sight of the other or others. I will cite as an example a volunteer who, after some time of work in the department for terminally ill children, realized that he was “burning out”. Realizing this, he did not leave completely, but temporarily switched to organizing administrative and financial assistance to the hospital, so that later he would return to direct work with children.

In situations of catastrophes and mass tragedies, as well as in situations where our loved ones experience grief, we have many strong feelings of our own. Fear of death, anxiety about one's own health, panic. It is no coincidence that in every culture rituals of farewell to the dead and expressions of condolence have been developed in detail, allowing a person to cope with pain and calm inner chaos by shifting the focus to others. Now new, time-appropriate rituals are emerging - for example, changing the profile photo on social networks, laying flowers and lighting candles at the embassy of the country in which the tragedy occurred. By expressing feelings in a civilized way, we already manage them.. A similar approach - "together, but separately" - in relation to loved ones can sometimes seem inappropriate, even betrayal, but in this way we can be truly needed, and our help - truly effective. Step aside a little, switch, but at the same time be aware of why and for what you are doing this - this can be a way out of a difficult situation.