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How to resolve the conflict: effective ways and practical recommendations. About conflict resolution

Conflicts are integral part of human life.

The ability to behave competently in adverse circumstances is the key to peace and self-confidence.

For this reason, it is useful for any person to study examples of what conflict situations can be and how to resolve them.

The concept and psychology of conflictology

- what it is? In short, this is clash of interests, opinions and views.

As a result of the conflict, a crisis situation arises in which each participant in the conflict seeks to impose his point of view on the other side.

An unstoppable conflict can lead to open confrontation, in which the subject of the dispute is relegated to the background and the ambitions of the parties come to the fore.

As a rule, as a result of the conflict, there are no losers and winners, since all participants expend their energy and, as a result, do not receive positive emotions.

special danger represent internal conflicts, when a person is tormented by conflicting thoughts and desires that tear him apart. Protracted states of internal conflicts often end in depression and neuroses.

A modern person needs to be able to recognize the emerging conflict in time, take competent steps to prevent the growth of the conflict and eliminate it at the stage of inception.

If, nevertheless, the conflict cannot be immediately extinguished, it is necessary to be able to build a correct and handle conflict well with minimal losses.

How does it arise?

As a result of numerous studies, it was determined that most conflicts arise without the corresponding intentions of their participants.

Often people involuntarily react to the conflictogens of other people, or they themselves are a source of conflictogens, as a result of which a stressful situation arises.

conflictogens- words, actions, deeds leading to conflict. They arise when participants have any psychological problems, or are used purposefully to achieve their goals.

Most conflictogens manifest themselves for the following reasons:

  • thirst for superiority. The desire to prove their worth;
  • aggressiveness. Initially aggressive behavior towards other people, caused by a negative emotional state;
  • selfishness. Striving to achieve your goals at any cost.

How do conflicts arise? True causes and solutions:

Popular methods of resolving the situation

The most effective strategies that are most often used in practice for conflict management are:


About ways to resolve conflicts in this video:

Resolution Methods

From a scientific point of view, there are specific methods for resolving conflict:

Structural

Most often used in the professional field. These include:

constructive

How to resist aggression and successfully resolve the conflict? Similar ways of resolving conflicts are more used in communication.

In order to successfully resolve the situation using constructive methods, it is necessary to form an adequate perception of the situation among the participants, arrange them for open interaction, create an atmosphere of goodwill and trust, jointly determine the root of the problem.

Design styles include:

Integral

Allows each side to feel like a winner. A similar effect is achieved when the parties agree to abandon their original positions, reconsider the situation and find a solution that satisfies everyone.

The method can only be applied if the parties to the dispute demonstrate flexibility of thinking and the ability to adapt to new circumstances.

Compromise

The most peaceful, mature way resolution of the situation.

The parties decide on mutual concessions in order to eliminate the negative factors that caused the dispute.

Such behavior of people makes it possible not only to peacefully resolve emerging contradictions without prejudice to anyone but also to build long-term communication relationships.

Way out of the conflict

How to get out of conflict situations? To get out of a difficult situation you need to take the following steps:

  1. Stop using words or doing actions that provoke a negative response from your opponent.
  2. Do not respond to such behavior on the part of the interlocutor.
  3. Demonstrate affection towards another person. You can do this with the help of gestures, facial expressions, words. Smiling, patting on the shoulder, shaking hands, using polite phrases - all this helps to smooth out disputes.

    The interlocutor immediately acquires a positive attitude and the situation is soon resolved.

Examples of conflict situations

In society

It's best to resolve using constructive methods.

For example, the neighbors of an apartment building may come into conflict over the distribution of parking spaces in the yard.

Some neighbors will insist on the organization of clear markings, according to which each car is assigned a specific parking space. Other tenants will advocate for the possibility of a free arrangement of cars.

In this situation the most effective methods of resolving a dispute would be to build a dialogue, joint resolution of the situation through compromise.

It is enough for the residents to organize a meeting and make a decision at it that part of the area in the courtyard is allocated for individual parking, while the other part remains for the supporters of arbitrary parking.

Between employees

It is better to solve structural methods.

For example, employees of the same team may come into conflict in connection with inability to work together in the same direction.

Each defines for himself a range of responsibilities, which is not approved by his colleague. The result is the emergence of a conflict situation and the inefficiency of joint work.

The manager of the employees involved in the dispute must apply the methods of clarifying the requirements, setting goals and assigning remuneration.

Each employee will be explained the principle of his work, a clear range of job responsibilities. In front of colleagues common goals will be set, reaching which they will receive the promised reward (bonus, promotion, etc.).

How to properly resolve conflicts? Find out from the video:

Completion Forms

What is the form of the end of the conflict? A conflict of interest can be completed as follows:

  1. Permission. The prerequisites may be the desire of the parties to end the dispute and not return to it in the future. For the final resolution of the conflict may require the involvement of third parties. This is especially true in the area of ​​professional relationships.
  2. attenuation. The dispute may cease to be relevant for one of the parties, or for all participants in the process. In the first case, the other side does not find a response to its own words and actions and is forced to end the conflict. In the second case, the parties simultaneously decide that they do not want to continue the dispute due to fatigue, the end of arguments, loss of interest in the subject of the dispute, etc.

    This type of end to the conflict is not always the case, since when a new stimulus arises, the dispute can resume with renewed vigor.

  3. Settlement. The parties come to a compromise, reach mutual agreements. As a result, the dispute is resolved through constructive dialogue and effective interpersonal interaction.
  4. elimination. The basis of the conflict is eliminated, transformed, modified, etc. In other words, the subject of the dispute ceases to be relevant at the current time and the fact of a conflict of interest automatically disappears.
  5. Growing into a new dispute. Unexplained contradictions on one issue can become a source of new conflicts generated by the primary dispute. Especially often, a similar effect is observed when a remark made by one of the spouses on any issue develops into a mutual exchange of reproaches.

Completion is not always a solution

Does the end of a conflict always mean its resolution? It is important not to confuse the concept of the end of a conflict situation with its resolution.

End of the conflict- this is the moment of the end of the actions of the parties at the current time, the termination of the dispute for various reasons (attenuation, development into a new dispute, etc.)

Completing a dispute now does not guarantee that it will will not reappear after some time. This is due to the fact that the source of the conflict is not dividing anywhere, and the parties have not reached any result.

Conflict resolution involves the conscious application of methods and techniques aimed at correcting the negative situation that has arisen.

The resolved conflict allows the parties to reconcile and no longer return to the subject of the dispute.

Thus, conflict can arise in any area of ​​human life. as a result of the conflict of his interests with the interests of other people.

There are many ways to get out of conflict. It is important to be able to put them into practice before the situation has moved to a serious level.

How to communicate with other people if you have different points of view on some issues with them, in this video:

Each of us is well aware of such a thing as conflict. They denote aggravated, contradictory situations in which each of the parties takes a position opposite to the interests of the opponent. Of course, conflict does not arise out of nowhere. The stages of conflict, however, are of separate interest in the field of psychology. In general, this topic in itself is very extensive. So it is worth considering it in a little more detail, paying attention to each important nuance.

Causes

Whatever the conflict, the main prerequisite for its occurrence is a clash of opposing interests, goals or opinions. However, there are objective factors that determine the causes of contradictions. But they are so diverse that it is impossible to group them according to any classification.

Natural causes of conflict are the most common. People are social, they live in society. They tend to defend their point of view. After all, this is how they protect what is dear to them - personal values. But only one manages to keep the situation under control, while others do not. As a result, irascibility, aggression begin to appear, and everything develops into an acute, contradictory situation.

Other prerequisites

Socio-psychological causes of conflicts are numerous. Often they lie in the individual incompatibility of opponents. People with incompatible temperaments and characters will conflict. As well as those individuals who have divergent ideas about life ideals, values ​​and goals.

And there are individual reasons. One person, for example, will conflict with another if his behavior seems unacceptable to him. Or if they have a different level of intellectual development, different ideas about the world, its perception. Lack of empathy, by the way, can also be the cause of contradictions.

initial stage

The pre-conflict situation is where it all starts. This is the zero step. But it is from her that the development of the conflict can begin. This is a certain risk of a contradictory situation. Usually it is "nipped in the bud". Opponents understand that if you continue to develop a topic that has caused a strong dispute, then it will end badly. And usually everyone decides to remain in their opinion.

But this is just a single example. Situations similar to the one described may arise in the course of a conversation or discussion. And it also happens that the pre-conflict stage lasts a very long time. It is accompanied by tension in the relations of opponents, which does not find a way out and solution, since it does not go into an open clash. Usually, placing all the dots over the "i" helps. However, sometimes there is even nothing to arrange. Sometimes one person may not even know that he is a potential participant in a conflict with a particular person who simply did not like him. The lack of mutual sympathy is a frequent factor that provokes contradictions.

Incident

If you do not cope with the initial stage, then the conflict will develop into it. The stages of conflict following the "zero" stage are incident and escalation. They are developing rapidly. The incident implies the beginning of a contradiction. Sometimes it can seem like it came out of nowhere. But that doesn't happen. In most cases, this simply turns out to be the “last straw”, which no longer fits in the bowl of the initial stage. And conflict erupts.

The stages of conflict that follow the incident imply the intensity of passions. Opponents argue, put forward arguments, swear, and the tension between them is increasing. This process is called escalation. How long it will last depends on the reason why it all started, and on the participants in the contradiction themselves. Some disputes are resolved in an hour. And some are able to quarrel for years, decades and even generations. Recall at least the famous tragedy by William Shakespeare, which revealed the theme of the conflict between the ancient families of the Montagues and the Capulets, which has been going on for centuries.

climax

It usually ends the conflict. The stages of the conflict listed earlier are often divided into several more stages, but everything ends with the so-called "dead point". The climax does not always mean a truce on both sides. On the contrary, most often it implies the accomplishment of such an event, the destructive power of which is so great that it becomes simply unsafe to continue developing a contradiction.

For example, we can again turn to the tragedy "Romeo and Juliet". Why did the Montecchi and Capuleti families end their feud? Because it was because of her that their children died. They realized the meaninglessness of their conflict, allowing the death of Romeo and Juliet. Only the death of their children brought them to their senses that kindness and love should rule the world, and not anger and enmity. The truce was a repentance and an attempt to ask for forgiveness from the dead for cruelty, pride and misunderstanding.

However, in real life, the parties to the conflict do not always come to the conclusion that the aggravation of relations has stopped. Some only intensify hostile actions, and this destroys not only the opponent, who has already become an adversary, but also themselves.

What does it all lead to?

The consequences of conflicts that could not be resolved in time are very sad. A person, due to his emotional vulnerability, becomes prone to stress. They accumulate, they can even develop into depression. If the opponent manifests himself in a dispute from a new, worse side, then the motivation to resolve the contradictory situation also disappears. A person is disappointed in who was dear to him, which often develops into hatred. The more the situation escalates, the more dynamic the relations between people worsen. There may be a desire to take revenge, to throw out your aggression in a bad deed.

Naturally, everything ends badly. The consequences of conflicts are disappointing. And many find it hard to believe that one can benefit from them. And indeed it is. There is no relationship without interpersonal contradictions. And that's okay. And the skillful resolution of sports can strengthen the connection between people, trust and a sense of justice. That's just for this you need to know how to behave in such situations.

How to get out of the situation?

So, the sequence of stages of the conflict was briefly described above. Now a few words can be said about the most popular ways that people resort to in order to get out of a controversial situation as quickly as possible.

Surprisingly, many decide to simply avoid the opponent and the conflict itself. These people tend to be very emotional and frustrated. Sometimes it’s easier for some to abandon a relationship than to solve an urgent problem.

The submissive method is popular among soft people. They calmly make unilateral concessions for the sake of the opponent, giving up their personal interests and desires. Submission can be justified. But only if it is combined with cunning. The person playing the role of the submissive must know that the problem will indeed be eliminated in this way. Otherwise, he may appear simply as a spineless, weak personality. And this will lead to claims in the future.

Other Methods

There are three more well-known methods by which you can resolve the conflict. The first is competition. And it is practiced not only in cases of contradictions in the business sphere. In interpersonal relationships, competition also takes place.

Let's say the wife wants to take out a mortgage, but the husband doesn't. They live with their mother-in-law. The daughter-in-law tells her about her idea, and she goes over to her side, since the idea of ​​young people buying their own housing is not so bad. And now, in addition to his wife, his mother also “presses” on a man. Although it is logical that initially she, so to speak, represented the interests of her son. In general, the principle of competition is simple. Other people are perceived by the parties to the conflict as tools in the struggle for personal interests.

But more often, compromise and cooperation are still practiced. The first method involves both parties giving up some of their demands in order to satisfy each other. And the second way is to cooperate with opponents to develop a joint solution that would suit both of them. The most efficient, by the way.

Rational approach to the problem

Perhaps the best system for resolving interpersonal contradictions belongs to the American psychologist Thomas Gordon. He studied the main stages of the conflict for a long time and eventually developed several steps for constructively resolving disputes.

First of all, opponents must identify the problem. It is necessary to concretize it, to name it, to give an exact wording. Then you need to talk about mutual feelings, expectations and needs. Participants in the conflict must hear and understand each other. And then - together come up with ways to solve the situation. The more there are, the better. Anyway, at the next stage, each option will have to be considered from a logical point of view and unsuitable ones should be thrown aside. And from the rest, choose one that would suit each side. And turn it into reality.

Surprisingly, many conflicts in relationships are resolved in this way. Expressive arguments will not help. Whether it's mutual respect and a practical approach to the situation.

Each person throughout his life repeatedly encounters various kinds of conflicts. As a rule, conflict is a signal for change and growth, better understanding and communication, whether with oneself or with other people. Although conflict management is not easy, it is important to do everything possible on your part so that the discussion of the controversial issue goes smoothly and you manage to overcome differences. Since conflicts are part of our daily lives, it is important to learn how to resolve them.

Steps

Part 1

Managing interpersonal conflicts

    Define the problem. Analyze the conflict to find out the root of the problem. Some conflicts seem so complex and confusing that it can be very difficult to find the true cause of the situation. However, if you carefully analyze the situation, most likely you can find one or two main problems of this conflict. Thanks to this, you will be able to clearly articulate what the essence of the problem is, and take the right position in the conflict.

    Identify the main personalities who are involved in the conflict. It's also important to make sure you know who the main people involved in the conflict are. Ask yourself who are you angry at and/or frustrated with? Are you taking your feelings out on the person who is responsible for the situation, or on someone else? Determine the person with whom you should resolve the conflict. This is no less important than the essence of the problem itself.

    State your concerns clearly. The other side of the conflict needs to know how you feel, what the problem is, and how it affects you. This will keep your conversation focused on your needs and emotions, and you won't blame the person for their misbehaving.

    Be an active listener. Learning to actively listen is one of the most powerful tools you need for healthy communication. The ability to listen will help you in your daily life, and will also contribute to positive, open and free communication with people. By actively listening to the interlocutor, you show that you understand his point of view. Here are some tips to help you be an active listener:

    Show the other side of the conflict that you understand him and reflect on his words. Often a conflict arises when a person feels that they are not being heard or understood. This means that some conflicts can be managed simply by showing understanding. During the conversation, show the person that you are analyzing his words. Thanks to this, you yourself will better understand the point of view of the interlocutor and show him that you understand and listen to him.

    • For example, if you have a conflict with a colleague and you listened to that person's point of view, summarize and say: "If I understand you correctly, you don't like that you are not involved in the creation of a new project, and you would very much like to become member of the planning committee. Then wait for the person to agree with your words or make the necessary adjustments.
  1. Work together to find a solution to the conflict. Collaborative conflict resolution assumes that each participant will stop blaming the other and take responsibility for the conflict that has arisen. Make a commitment to do everything possible on your part to work with the conflicting party to resolve the problem. There are several tactics that can help both you and the person with whom you are in conflict to come to a common denominator:

    Stay with your opinion. Everyone has their own point of view and we don't always agree with everything others say. Don't try to figure out which one of you is "right". It doesn't matter and is unlikely to help resolve the conflict.

    Be prepared to give in if appropriate. It is not always possible to resolve the issue in such a way that both parties to the conflict are completely satisfied, especially if one of the parties refuses to negotiate and stands firm on its own. If this situation arises, reflect on how important the essence of the problem is for you, whether you can give in or it is better to continue the dialogue in order to resolve the conflict in another way.

    • Is the problem important to you? Ask yourself about it. Perhaps the solution to this issue affects your ego. If the other side of the conflict is not ready to compromise, and you understand that this issue is more important for this person, then it may be time to reach out and end the conflict.
    • When making concessions, avoid drama. You can say: “Kolya, I heard your point of view when we discussed the difference in the schedule. While I still stand by my opinion, I see that you are unlikely to give in. I am ready to do my best to put an end to the misunderstanding that has arisen. I will support you by following the schedule we have made.” You can have an opinion while supporting the person's point of view.
  2. Take a break. If you see that the situation has reached an impasse, ask the other side of the conflict to give you some time to reflect on the arguments being made. However, do not make the other side of the conflict wait. Specify the day and time when you can continue the conversation. You can also ask this person to think about your point of view.

    • During your break, try to put yourself in the other person's shoes and think about why their solution is so important to them. Putting yourself in the place of another, ask yourself: "How would I negotiate with a person like me?"
    • Be sure to rethink your point of view. Can you give in on something less important and continue to stick to your position on an issue that matters to you?
    • If you have a conflict at work, write a correct summary of your last conversation and send it to the other party in the conflict. Make sure that your letter is objective and does not contain threats. By taking such a step, you will show your opponent that you understand the essence of the conflict. In addition, by doing this you will remind the person of your point of view. You will also show that you are ready to solve the problem that has arisen through diplomacy. Moreover, a summary of the problem in writing places the responsibility on both sides of the conflict.
  3. Maintain privacy. Discuss the situation only with the other side of the conflict. Remember, you need to solve the problem only with the person with whom you have a conflict. If you turn a blind eye to the problem or tell other people about it, you can only count on the escalation of the conflict and the spread of rumors.

    Farewell. If you offended each other, find the strength in yourself for sincere forgiveness, even if it is impossible to forget what happened. This approach will prove your maturity and is the shortest way to resolve the conflict and continue the relationship.

    • If you cannot forgive the other person, you will still need to find ways to continue the relationship if you are forced to live under the same roof or work together.
    • It takes a strong character and compassion to forgive someone. After forgiving the person who hurt you, you can be proud of your ability to forgive and resolve conflicts.
    • If rumors have already spread, ask the other side of the conflict to help you develop a joint plan, following which you can put an end to gossip.
  4. Ask a third party to mediate. If you see that the situation has reached a dead end, ask for help from a person who can help you in this situation. Get help from a psychologist or a close friend.

    • As a rule, a third party assesses the situation more objectively, which is not always the case with the direct participants in the conflict, who are overwhelmed by emotions.

    Part 2

    Management of intrapersonal conflicts
    1. Understand the nature of intrapersonal conflict. Intrapersonal or internal conflicts are contradictions that occur within a person. In an intrapersonal conflict, there are no subjects of conflict interaction in the person of individuals or groups of people.

      Define conflict. Ask yourself what emotions you are experiencing and try to determine the reason for them. Keep a diary that will help you keep track of your actions and feelings. A diary can be a good help when you are faced with an internal conflict. This is your adviser, which helps to uncover the cause of the internal conflict.

Interpersonal conflict is a fairly common phenomenon that occurs every day. We live in a society that dictates to live by its own rules. The values ​​and interests of different people do not always coincide with each other. If this does not happen, but important components of life are infringed, a conflict arises. It requires an immediate solution. After all, until the significant causes of the conflict are eliminated, it will not go away on its own. Otherwise, the tension only grows, and the relationship deteriorates.

Interpersonal conflict involves at least two participants in the process. Interpersonal conflict is formed under the influence of such reasons as incontinence, aggressiveness, unwillingness to yield to one's opponent. The conflict is especially complicated by the fact that each person seeks to defend his interests in a dispute and does not care about his partner at all. Few people in a critical situation are able to think about others. Often people who are in conflict cause each other severe mental pain and do not even notice it. Behavior often becomes uncontrollable and inadequate in relation to the very reason that led to the conflict. Conflict resolution always requires a person to change their behavior and take responsibility for what is happening.

There are more than enough reasons for the development of interpersonal conflict. The reasons can be both weighty arguments and completely trifling cases. The conflict between people sometimes flares up so quickly that they do not have time to understand anything. The way people think and behave is changing. What significant reasons most often provoke the development of interpersonal conflict? Let's try to figure it out!

clash of characters

This is a very significant reason why people come into conflict with each other. Each person has their own unique set of personality traits. This characteristic makes it unique and unrepeatable. Interpersonal conflict brings people into conflict. Many do not want to hear their opponent, but only try to prove their case to him. The clash of characters provides that each seeks to express his personal point of view and does not really care about hearing the arguments of the enemy. The conflict will escalate until the parties change their behavior.

Inconsistency of views

Another significant reason for the development of the conflict is the difference in the interests of the participants. Therefore, it is difficult for people to understand each other because their attention is directed in completely different directions. The discrepancy between views on such important things as family, work, attitude to finances, traditions and holidays gives rise to frank misunderstanding. The formation of the conflict occurs at the moment when the behavior of the opponent begins to dissatisfy to a large extent. Interpersonal conflict contributes to the removal of people from each other, the appearance of coldness, some reticence. In order for the conflict to be resolved peacefully, you will have to make a lot of effort and, first of all, change your behavior.

addictive behavior

The reason for the development of interpersonal conflict can be addictive behavior. Any dependence assumes that the person begins to behave inappropriately, relieves himself of all responsibility for what is happening. Conflict will inevitably arise if no timely action is taken to eliminate unfavorable behavior. This situation is complicated by the fact that the dependent party often does not realize the existence of the cause of the problem and prolongs the conflict itself. Dependent behavior can be expressed not only in the adoption of toxic, toxic substances (alcohol, drugs), but also in painful attachment to another person. The need to constantly see the object of one's adoration can provoke the development of interpersonal conflict, its resolution will require great mental strength.

Relationship dissatisfaction

A fairly common reason for the formation of conflict between people is dissatisfaction in relationships. The inability to give in, to find a middle ground can lead to an aggravation of interpersonal conflict. It is not dangerous in itself, especially if the parties somehow strive to resolve it. A conflict of such a plan should lead people to begin to reconsider their relationship, to look for something significant and valuable in them.

Types of interpersonal conflicts

Interpersonal conflict can manifest itself in different ways in the interaction of opponents. Among the main types, it is customary to single out hidden and open conflicts, which rightly reflect the degree of a person's attitude towards them. The resolution of the conflict largely depends on the form in which it is expressed.

open conflict

This type of psychology is often called conscious. That is, a person, entering into conflict with someone from his environment, is fully aware of what is happening to him. Open conflict is characterized by violent showdowns. The feelings shown are not masked, but directed directly at the opponent, the words are spoken in person. Even if a person has an excessively soft and compliant disposition, he, one way or another, shows his position.

Hidden Conflict

This one is quite common. It assumes that the participants in the process do not realize the gravity of the situation. A hidden conflict may not appear at all for a long time, until one of the opponents decides to take action. The unwillingness to admit the existence of a conflict is dictated by the following reason: we were taught from childhood that negative feelings can have bad consequences, and therefore it is better to hush them up. Such a position does not allow a person to express himself, to fully express dissatisfaction. As a result, the conflict drags on by itself and can continue for a relatively long time.

Behavior in interpersonal conflict

The resolution of the conflict depends on how the participants in the action show wisdom. I must say that interpersonal conflict should not be left to chance. First of all, you should understand its causes and, of course, change your own behavior.

domination

This is a type of behavior in which people never want to give in to each other. Everyone stubbornly continues to defend his position even when the situation is comical. Such an action cannot in any way lead to an adequate solution of the complex problem that caused the development of the conflict. Dominance as a method assumes that the person considers his person to be right, and the other person must obey.

Finding a compromise

The method of compromise makes people turn towards each other. With such behavior, even the most sworn enemies can meet at the same table to discuss significant details and reach a peace agreement. The search for a compromise implies that people begin to look for a constructive solution to the problem.

concession

Concession causes a person to give up their own opinions and ambitions. Usually people resort to this method when they feel extremely insecure in a conflict. If a person considers himself unworthy of something, he will always choose just such a position. Of course, it cannot be considered productive for personal growth. The ability to yield is very useful in family relationships. After all, if each of the spouses constantly insists on his own, harmony will not work. Giving in will help mitigate the destructive effect of the conflict, but not really solve it.

Resolution of interpersonal conflicts

Interpersonal conflict necessarily requires close attention. If you let it take its course, then the situation will only get worse over time. How should significant conflicts be resolved? What steps do the opponents need to take to reach an agreement?

Acceptance of the situation

This is the first thing to do if you really want to improve the situation. Do not take a desperate argument to the extreme, by itself it cannot be resolved. Resolution will happen only if you begin to comprehend what is happening. Stop complaining about fate and consider yourself a victim. Analyze the situation, try to understand what your actions led to the formation of the conflict.

Emotional restraint

When it comes to resolving a controversial situation, it is important to be sensitive to your partner. Emotional restraint will help you avoid escalating the conflict. There is nothing worse than ruining relationships with loved ones who surround you every day. Find the strength in yourself to step back from your own ambitions for a while and just watch what happens.

Thus, interpersonal conflict is a phenomenon that a reasonable person can control. It is worth remembering that not only mood, but also the prospect of relationships with other people depends on your behavior.

Instruction

A conflict is a clash of interests. In order to understand why and how it arose, it is necessary to try to restore the events that preceded it, to replay the situation in the head again. Before trying to convince others that you are right, you need to think about what solution will suit all parties. What are they willing to reckon with, and what will be categorically rejected. Based on your interests, clearly identifying them, you can already begin to resolve differences with other participants in the conflict. After all, as a rule, they arise when people have opposite points of view on any issue, although they are forced to act collectively.

Conflicts rarely arise out of the blue. As a rule, this is preceded by some history of personal relationships or business cooperation. Conflicts, at the same time, are sometimes called quarrels that spontaneously arise between practically unfamiliar people, whose interests can intersect quite unexpectedly.

Unfortunately, there are also people with a "conflict" character. They are much more likely to lose their temper, showing impatience for someone else's point of view, and can often provoke their interlocutors. Having splashed out emotions, people of a similar warehouse usually feel quite satisfied. It is important to take into account the characteristics of the nature of the participants in the conflict. For example, a stormy manifestation of emotions and a showdown are characteristic. At the same time, such people are distinguished by outgoing. After waiting for some time, it is already possible to discuss options for solving problems with them in a calm atmosphere.

The situation is different when the parties to the conflict are at different levels of the hierarchical ladder. For example, if the boss has more than once made a scandal in the past, it would seem out of the blue, henceforth it is worth considering what can be done to exclude the possibility of a repetition of such cases. If there are no objective reasons for the conflict, and you can’t change your attitude to the behavior of the leadership, alas, you should think about searching. It is not worth exposing your nervous system to additional stresses in the conditions of an already difficult modern life, full of stress, because of the bosses who are too prone to conflicts.

Paradoxically, according to some experts, conflicts can be useful. If you try to carefully analyze the emergence of the conflict, you can learn a lot of very useful information. With the help of this information, it will be easier to establish a working environment or mutual understanding in the family. To do this, you just need to understand what were the goals of the participants, what events served as a catalyst for the conflict, what was the clash of interests of the parties. Having answered at least these basic questions, in the future you can competently build your behavior and relationships with people around you in order to avoid the repetition of conflict situations.