How to contain emotions and not cry. How to learn to hold back tears in any life situation

Unfortunately, there are many reasons for tears, especially in women. There are times when crying is not even a sin at all, but on the contrary, it is an emotional release. But it happens when tears, especially in front of others, cause aggression or can simply harm the cause. How to learn to hold back tears in such situations and learn not to cry when you really want to?

How to hold back tears when you want to cry

Tears, as a rule, appear when the body experiences a strong emotional shock caused by external stimuli. In this case, the first thing to do is to switch your attention.

For example, the threat of danger that induces action, distracts a person from self-pity and mobilizes forces for protection. What needs to be done to quickly cause such a reaction?

To hold back tears, pinch yourself discreetly, bite your lip or tongue. Pain will instantly return you, as they say, to the ground and you won’t want to cry. Just do not overdo it, so as not to harm your health and not to frighten those around you with blood flowing down your chin.

Another way to learn not to cry in a difficult situation is to breathe evenly, deeply through your nose. As soon as tears roll in, take a deep breath through your nose and slowly exhale through your mouth. Such breathing exercises are used by yogis, psychologists and anyone who wants to achieve calm and harmony or learn to restrain anger and tears.

The method of switching attention is also very effective. At the moment when you want to cry, think about something completely extraneous or start looking at the objects around you to the smallest detail. To hold back tears, you can also count to ten or twenty, remember the words of a song or poem, and finally, you can read a prayer.

How to learn to hold back tears if there are people who are capable of sympathy and you are sure that they will feel sorry for you? Very simple, try not to get distracted by them. Because just looking at the expression on the face of such a person will not leave a single chance to hold back tears.

And despite the various situations, do not forget that tears are an important element in a person's life, which is both psychological and physiological. Tears are able to remove toxic substances from the body and relieve emotional stress.

Moreover, if you are an impressionable and prone to melancholy person, you should not hold back crying. At least, having adequately coped with the situation, retire and pay off everything that has accumulated.

How to hold back tears when you really want to cry

Every morning, standing in front of the mirror and looking into your eyes, repeat that you are strong, smart, that you are really the best, that you are not afraid of anything and no one, you will be able to overcome absolutely all life's obstacles.

You will be able to endure any suffering, no one will break your will and will not force you to bow before anyone else. Thus, you will inspire aspiration and confidence in yourself, become more firm, and no tears and sobs will overpower you, you will be able to look at yourself from a different perspective and draw certain conclusions.

However, every medal has a downside. As already mentioned, crying is a surge of emotions, and emotions need to be given free rein from time to time, in other words, “let off steam”.

In case of urgent need, when you cannot understand what to do, if you want to cry, it is better to retire, cry alone or turn to a loved one who will listen to you and treat you with understanding. Speak out, share your impressions, ask for advice. If you cry out all the tears, it will become much easier.

Why does a person's eyes water

Possible damage or speck

If your eyes water uncontrollably and this is not associated with any emotional experiences, you should carefully examine the mucous membrane. Perhaps there is damage or a mote on it, which does not cause a feeling of the presence of something foreign, but the eyes are watery. Try rinsing your eyes with cool water, if the tearing does not go away, consult an ophthalmologist.

Inflammation

Tearing is sometimes the cause of inflammation in the eyes. Bacterial, viral, fungal and other infections are accompanied by lacrimation. In this case, you should immediately contact an ophthalmologist who will prescribe eye drops containing antibiotics. It is not recommended to use such drops on your own.

Allergy

How to stop tears if they are caused by an allergic reaction. Here you should, as in the previous paragraph, either consult a doctor (if this is the first time), or take an anti-allergic medicine on time.

Tears from onions

To learn not to cry when cutting onions, you must first moisten the knife and onion with cool water. The substance that causes tears dissolves in water and does not get into the air, preventing tearing.

Tearfulness with tired eyes

Increased tearfulness with eye fatigue is removed by compresses from tea leaves. Soak cotton swabs in tea leaves and apply to your eyes for fifteen to twenty minutes before going to bed. This procedure also helps with a slight inflammatory process.

emotional tears

It is difficult to stop tears caused by emotional experiences. If something serious has happened and tears tearing out are practically choking, you should not hold them back, cry and let the negativity out. If we are talking about resentment, insult or other conflict, in order to hold back tears, try to abruptly switch your thoughts and remember something good. These manipulations will distract you from what is happening and you will be able to contain the impulse of emotions.

What to do if you want to cry, but you can't

We are all very different, and react differently to events taking place in the world around us. Some are almost indifferent to everything, while others immediately burst into tears when any stressful situation arises. Meanwhile, crying in front of friends, colleagues or strangers is always unpleasant. So how to hold back tears in a situation where it is highly undesirable to show them to interlocutors?

To hold back tears, discreetly pinch your inner thigh or other particularly sensitive skin area. Pain is always of paramount importance for the brain, which means that this trick will help you easily isolate yourself from the cause of tears. The main thing is not to overdo it, and not cause an attack of tears provoked by pain.

To hold back tears, take yourself out of the situation: realize that you supposedly forgot about this or that important and urgent matter and hurriedly leave.

Try to hold your breath for a while. By concentrating on it, you can easily stop the attack of tears and take your emotions under tight control.

Bite your lower lip. This trick is somewhat similar to the first proposed method, and is aimed at “deceiving” the body, refocusing its attention on pain. The main thing is not to leave marks on the lip and not bite through it until it bleeds.

Think in advance what thoughts can distract you from the current situation at a critical moment. Alternatively, it can be memories of a particular pleasant, positive event, or attempts to solve pressing, topical everyday problems. To hold back tears, try to solve several problems at the same time or try to mentally recite your favorite poem, sing lines from your favorite song, remember the multiplication table.

If you have the opportunity, then make a few sharp, intense movements.

Concentrate your attention on a particular object that is in the distance, and begin to study it in the most thorough way. The main thing is not to look in the face of a person who can make you cry. If it is difficult to avoid a direct look at him, then try to mentally laugh at him. Recall the offender's ridiculous habits or imagine him dressed in a ridiculous clown costume.

Now you know how to hold back tears in the right situation. However, do not use the above techniques all the time: psychologists say that tears are the best way of psychological relaxation and physiological protection from stress.

How to learn not to cry if you really want to

We are all very different. And we react differently to everything around us. From some it is impossible to knock out tears, while others, just a little - immediately into tears. Both of these have their downsides. Crying for any reason, and even in front of strangers, employees, friends, is quite unpleasant.

On the other hand, it is impossible to experience all the problems “dry”, as this can lead to mental stress and poor health. Let's try to figure out how to learn to hold back tears.

Often crying people sometimes find themselves in awkward situations when tears begin to run like a river, and even at the wrong moment. For example, the boss shouted, the teacher made a strict remark at the lesson, they were rude in transport.

And now a lump rolls up in their throats, their voice trembles treacherously, tears roll into their eyes. But you don’t want to cry and show your weakness in front of strangers! But tears don't care about that, they flow on their own. From this it becomes even more offensive and you want to burst into tears.

You should drink as much water as possible in large sips;
Take 10 deep breaths and breaths;
If possible, make several intense sharp movements;
Switch stress from psychological to physical. Use this method: pinch yourself, bite your tongue, pull your hair. Usually this method allows you to quickly recover;
Start mentally remembering the multiplication table, phone numbers, etc.;
If the tears are caused by someone in particular, put him in your imagination in some funny costume, or imagine him as a gray mouse with huge ears or as a toad with huge slanting eyes.

These are very effective ways to hold back tears in the right situation. But do not try to completely stop crying, as psychologists say that sometimes crying is even good.

Tears are a kind of psychological release and a physiological defense against stress. Therefore, you do not need to hold back tears all the time. You can feel free to cry while watching a sad movie, or a tragic story on the news.

Even if we quietly let out a small tear, this is considered a small, but necessary discharge. But when we cry very hard, we take active deep breaths and exhalations. Thanks to this, we throw off all the negativity at the level of physiology. If this does not happen, we will create psychopathic clamps that lead to radiculitis and osteochondrosis.

In life, situations often arise when emotions overflow and you want to cry. However, not everyone wants to do this in public. For this reason, you need to hold back tears, but not everyone knows how. But there are ways that will help to do this, you just need to get together and remember them in a stressful situation.

How not to cry when hurt

Some people take great pleasure in humiliating others in order to become more significant. They just like to see others cry because it makes them feel superior. Most often, sensitive people become their victims. In this case, they need to try to respond with rudeness to rudeness. However, in a stressful situation, it is quite difficult to fight back. For this reason, tears appear in the eyes. How not to cry in this situation? The best way here is to hurt yourself. You can, for example, dig your nails into your hand or bite your cheek. Such actions allow you to divert your attention from the problem and the desire to cry will immediately disappear. You can also pull out a few hairs or pull on your ear. What matters here is not so much the action as the moment of distraction.

Also, a good way to avoid crying in public is to mentally imagine your abuser in a comical situation. So, for example, you can put a bucket of slop or garbage on his head. As a result, he will not look harsh, on the contrary, he will want to laugh. In addition, it can be dressed in rags or even undressed. The choice is really wide, the main thing is to practice a little and at a crucial moment, instead of wanting to cry, you want to laugh. If a person constantly brings to tears, then this can be done, because this act will discourage him. Listening to offensive things from a spiteful critic, you can mentally pour water, slop, paint, dirt on him. Thus, it will be possible to distract from his words, and they will not be so offensive.

How not to cry at an important event

Many have a habit of crying at weddings, birthdays, because they are overwhelmed with joyful emotions and in this way a person gives them an outlet. Of course, no one condemns for this, but the makeup of the fair sex after tears leaves much to be desired. In this case, you should remember how much time it took for him, then all the desire to cry will disappear. If, nevertheless, tears appear, then you should leave and look at yourself in the mirror. An unsightly appearance will frighten any girl, so she will immediately stop crying.

In order not to cry at an important event, you should remember about breathing. As soon as emotions begin to overwhelm, you need to take a few deep breaths. It is best to go outside to get some fresh air, a few minutes will be enough. Inhaling it, you need to imagine how calmness enters the body, and with each exhalation, excitement and the desire to cry go away.

For some people, a cigarette helps hold back tears. So, when emotions begin to overwhelm and you want to cry, you need to smoke. One cigarette will be enough. Do not abuse this method, as it will not benefit your health. It is important to know that smoking shifts consciousness from one subject to another, so in this case, psychologists advise drinking a glass of wine or water. The main thing is that the brain switched to another object. You can even go to eat something, even if it is an ordinary candy.

All of the above methods allow you not to cry in public places. However, when a person is alone at home and he wants to shed a tear, you should not restrain your emotions. According to psychologists, crying is good. This is due to the fact that a person needs to give vent to his emotions, you should not save them. Holding back tears can lead to a real nervous breakdown later on. It will be much more difficult to treat it, as it leads to depression, and this condition often evokes thoughts of suicide.

Question to the psychologist:

Hello, my name is Zarui.

I have a problem communicating with my mom. I can communicate well with many, but I can’t discuss the same topic with my mother. In principle, I trust her and am sure that all our conversations will remain with us. But when I want to tell her something or tell her about my problems, or just ask for advice, I immediately start crying and talking with a trembling voice, and as always she gets nervous or angry from this, asks to explain why I'm crying, because it's for her ( and, in principle, to me) is very disturbing and the conversation does not work out as always. She, in turn, really wants and is ready to understand me, give advice, listen to me, but my crying interferes with everything. And if I do not cry during such conversations, then we will have a miracle relationship.

I myself don’t know why I’m crying, I’m not afraid of her, and I’m not afraid of her advice and reaction either, but what I want to say is just about my life’s difficulties or the type that I’m not ashamed of. No shame. Not fear. I don’t know why I’m crying and how to stop tears, even if only during a conversation. Well, a lump in my throat. It bothers me a lot in the first place. I know that tears are a way of showing emotions, but in such cases, there is no need to show emotions at all. Well, let's say I want to tell her that, in my opinion, maybe one of my friends likes me, or I just like someone, or I have problems with my studies, or that I'm afraid not to find a job in my specialty, or I just lost heart, or that I don't understand something do in my thesis. (My brother helps me with my diploma and it happens that he gives me a task that I don’t always succeed in, and since we don’t have much time, it happens that it makes me nervous because I didn’t solve the problem) and about the fact that I can’t solve this problem, it also doesn’t work with my mother discuss. Well, now, according to my mother, the time that I spend on dancing (amateur dancing 2 days a week for 1.5 hours) and in her opinion I should not go to classes this month so that I can also devote this time to my thesis. And the fact that these 3 hours a week will not interfere with me and that this can be called my rest time, I cannot discuss with her. Well, I'm crying. I can't even say the whole sentence without crying. In principle, I can not go to dances (although I really want to), but I can’t say what don’t do.

Please help me, how to deliberately not cry in such situations???

The psychologist Tsibizova Ekaterina Romanovna answers the question.

In your case, the internal stress affects. A diploma, sympathies that arise, a desire to find a new job, stop showing your emotions ... You have listed so many problems that it remains for you to recommend that you stop for a while and consider the speed of your life. We sometimes do not even notice the burden that weighs on Us, which we carry behind our backs because we do not have enough time even to comprehend it. And later, for no reason or with someone's help, we start throwing ourselves at relatives and passers-by, crying, defending our point of view, falling into depression, drinking alcohol and ... this can be continued endlessly. Isn't it time for us to stop and say to ourselves: “Calm down! You can do more if you start acting judiciously and systematically. Write down all your thoughts on paper and read them again, carefully considering whether we need them the way they are in our head. Your tears are the accumulated negative emotions that you already have over the edge. Your pace of life and the desire to fill this life with meaning (education, work, family) cause you stress that you do not have time to get rid of. Close your eyes. And relax.. Visualize your tears. Imagine that they are small pieces of ice, precious stones, or anything, if only you could collect them from your face and discard yourself with the thought that your negativity is in them and you are getting rid of it. Imagine that each tear is a negative that your body gets rid of. Imagine a tear “fear of crying when talking with your mother” and wipe it off your face, forget that such fear existed in your head at all. Do this exercise in the morning and evening so that during the day your head is cleared of bad thoughts and emotions that make you feel uncomfortable. Most importantly, do not dwell on this unpleasant situation and move on! And don't stop dancing. In dancing, we express our emotions without fear of being misunderstood. Be happy!

On the site "Beautiful and Successful" today we will talk about how to hold back tears and not cry at the most inopportune moment. Any situation can lead to tears, especially during the period of the female “hormonal storm”. But it is not always appropriate to let them go.

There are women who skillfully manipulate tears, getting indulgences at work or attention in their personal lives.

But what if you don't want anyone to see how upset you are?

Any psychologist will tell you that if you want to cry, then you don’t need to restrain yourself. - This is the body's reaction to stress, emotional discharge, which quickly relieves nervous tension.

Unfortunately, the place, time, and often the pride of the “victim” herself do not always allow this. Just remember how a sobbing sobbing lonely girl looks on the street. It makes passers-by pity and a desire to help. This is at best.

Many people prefer to just stare or even shy away from such a spectacle. Crying in the street is not accepted. It is believed that a person who does not know how to hold back tears from resentment is weak; that there must be a reasonable reason to shed "tears on people."

Holding back tears means staying in shape, with normal makeup, complexion and eye size, coming out of the situation as a winner.

Crying at work means giving rise to gossip. Some recruiters prefer to conduct interviews in a tough style to check if the applicant is able to work in stressful situations or under pressure (we talked about the so-called).

So, information on how to learn to hold back tears in cold blood can come in handy in the modern world.

trick the brain

There are several ways to force the brain to focus on other sensations and “forget” about emotions:

Pinch yourself in a sensitive place, such as the inside of your thigh or arm, bite your lip. So the body will focus on physical sensations, and emotions will recede into the background.
Hold your breath and try to hold out as long as possible, the body will set aside minor matters in order to prepare for a possible emergency.

How to hold back tears when talking - ambulance

In a situation where you have been unfairly offended, and a lump rises to the throat, the site recommends using several techniques to restrain sobs:

Inhale slowly, fully focusing on the process of inhalation and exit.
Switch your attention to something else, there must be many small details. For example, remember the multiplication table or mentally recite your favorite poem, remember the phone number of a colleague or count the leaves on a flower branch.
Drink water - slowly, in small sips, concentrating on the process.
Your task is to reduce the intensity of stress at the moment when tears come to the throat. You can effectively relieve tension with a few sharp movements. Walk around the room, open the window, move the chair.
If possible, try to immediately leave the room where the conflict occurred. During stress, any word of sympathy or pity from a “third” side is not a way to hold back tears from a sudden offense, but a password that opens “heavenly abysses”.
Go to the ladies' room and soak your whiskey, forehead, arms to the elbows, neck with cold water. This will help fight stress.
Keep your eyes open as wide as possible and try not to blink.
Try to look distantly past people's faces, preferably into the distance.
Raise your eyebrows high and hold until the emotions subside.
Raise your eyes up without raising your head.
Relax the jaw muscles, open and close your mouth wide several times.

How to learn to hold back tears

If the cause of tears is a person who offended you, for example, an evil boss, then everything must be done so that your resentment towards him is firmly replaced by another, no less strong emotion, preferably the opposite.

Imagine how his wife saws him for the Christmas tree that was not taken out in May, how he was teased at school, or how he is afraid of spiders. Resentment will immediately decrease, and you will become more cheerful.

Since it is difficult to hold back tears during an emotional conversation, it is better to do “work on the mistakes” when emotions subside. Think about whether this situation will excite you in six months or a year? Not? So there was no point in crying about her.

“Turn on” this question in your head every time you begin to choke sobs. Remember which word or expression caused you negative emotions and emotions? Why did you react like that? Perhaps you didn't like the raised tone? What would your more stress-resistant friend or girlfriend in the sedative commercial do in this situation?

If you get upset and cry too often, then most likely you are not getting enough sleep. Inadequate sleep is a 100% guarantee that at the decisive moment you will not be able to hold back your tears and burst into tears.

It will not be superfluous to also slightly strengthen the nervous system, for example, drink a course of vitamins or supplements with Omega-3 acids.

If you, literally from every little thing, then you should probably consult a specialist about the functioning of the thyroid gland. Crying is a way of self-regulation of the body, which will save your spine and pancreas. Therefore, having mastered the technique of how to hold back tears, do not forget to cry well when you are alone so that restrained emotions do not harm you.

Tears are a natural reaction to trouble, grief or stress, but most people prefer not to show them to others. It is not easy to hold back when resentment or anger rolls over. In this article, we have collected psychological techniques that will help you not cry when you really want to. After reading our material, you will learn to control yourself!

How not to cry when you really want - exercise

Psychologists advise to concentrate on breathing in moments of emotional excitement. You may have noticed that when you feel like crying out of resentment, your breathing gets confused and accelerated, and in moments of severe stress or fear, you even stop getting enough air for a while. To calm yourself, you need to calm your breathing. Do you feel like you're about to burst into tears? Raise your chin and take a few deep breaths in through your nose, exhaling through your mouth. Thus, you can get rid of the so-called lump in the throat. Try to count your breathing movements, imagine how the air fills your lungs. An unpleasant lump in the throat will help to remove a couple of sips of water or cool tea. If there is no liquid nearby: swallow several times. And don't forget about breathing.

If tears are already in your eyes, blink them away. You should not wipe your eyes indicatively, what good else will you rub your cosmetics! Look down, then lift your eyes up, look right and left. Repeat this exercise several times until the tears are gone. Some psychologists advise to close your eyes for a few seconds.

You can also distract yourself from unpleasant thoughts by performing certain physical actions. You can, for example, bite your lip or clench your fist. But, remember that you should not feel pain, only a slight discomfort that can draw your attention to yourself. If there is a person nearby whom you trust, or someone who is aware of your psychological state, his palm can become your support.

Yawning, by the way, also helps to calm down! In addition, you definitely won’t be able to cry and yawn at the same time! Physical exercise is very effective and will benefit your nervous system!

How not to cry at the wrong moment - psychological exercises

In order not to cry at the wrong moment, think of something that will take all your attention. How about solving a math problem in your head or repeating the multiplication table? Not only will you concentrate on it, but also make the left hemisphere of the brain, which is responsible for computational operations, work. Emotions - controls the right; by stimulating the work of both hemispheres of the brain, you can effectively block the emotional flow. If math isn't your forte, remember the words to your favorite song, or even sing it to yourself. The melody should be cheerful, and the lyrics should be positive.

The second psychological technique is more complicated, but more effective. You need to remember something funny. Of course, focusing on something positive when tears come to your eyes is not an easy task. Psychologists advise in advance to come up with and memorize a list of jokes from films or funny situations from your life that you will remember in moments of emotional experiences. Try to smile!

Motivate yourself not to cry! For example, "if I cry, the boss will think I'm weak" or "strangers will see that I can't control myself." Tell yourself that you are strong and right now it is important to prove it!