People who have gone crazy from loneliness are examples. Loneliness is the only way to know yourself

On your favorite New Year's holidays, the number of suicides rises - terrible, right? Because those who do not have a family fall out of their usual active communication for a long time (we will not discuss loneliness for good)

A few years ago, when I first found myself on a two-week New Year's vacation alone, I panicked a lot. The phone was silent (usually almost a hundred calls a day were heard at work!), The children went on vacation, and I divorced my husband that year

Of course, I didn’t think about suicide, but, to be honest, I didn’t feel comfortable ... I sat at home alone like an owl. I went for a walk, so couples with gift bags in their hands, cooing and kissing, pissed off even more

I allowed myself to be sad for a day, drink a bottle of wine under the click of the TV remote control, and then opened my notebook and began to call everyone in a row - to congratulate me on the New Year. In one family they say to me: “Why are you at home? We were sure that you were somewhere in the mountains or on the sea. If not, come visit us!" So I did. A day later, I traveled with gifts to a few more friends and my heart brightened. It turned out that the holidays are not enough to chat with everyone you want.

Do not make a cult out of NG. The holiday, of course, is beloved, bright and joyful, but if you are suddenly left alone, do not panic.

We are rarely alone with ourselves, all the time the information background and stereotypes are crushing, and this is not good. Relax, spend a few days the way you want - eat, walk, go skiing, even if the last time you stood on them was at school.

If you have a subscription to the fitness room - go there for the whole day, why not? Would you like to try skiing? Look at the ads in the newspaper, find an instructor and go for it. Many of my lonely acquaintances are going to go to Gorky Park this New Year's Eve. There are ice rinks, cafes and a lot of people. Why is it necessary to sit at the table and be sad? You can take an electric train and drive 50 km from your city - to another, also interesting. Spend the night in a hotel, feel something new in your life. But rushing to a nightclub with the same lonely girlfriend, if in fact you don’t really like this business, is not worth it. Spoil the mood, the soul can become even worse.

On the last NY, one of my girlfriends, yielding to the persuasion of a stubborn aunt from a dating site, went with strangers to a boarding house. She can’t remember that night without a shudder... Women of different ages and builds, wearing cat ears and ponytails provided by the organizers, almost fought over a handful of men - bald, not of the first youth... The friend locked herself in the room and stared at the poorly showing TV all night.

Now she decided to just stay at home - she bought some tasty little things, and in the evening of the first she is going on some kind of tour of Moscow. I have already painted all the New Year holidays - either the Planetarium, or the Pushkin Museum, or just skiing around Sokolniki. On the 5th I will join her - we will take the food to the dog shelter, this year we decided to help the animals. And on Christmas we will take gifts to the nursing home, they are much worse off than all of us, while still young. How are you going to spend the upcoming holidays?

Loneliness is one of the "darkest" states inherent in a person. The person himself is social by nature - he needs communication, support, and the release of emotions. And when you are all alone, then there comes a complete and hopeless depression.

In addition to the fact that depression itself internally burns out a person, the state of loneliness “accelerates” this process several times. And it is not surprising that so many can not cope with such a mental load. The consequences can be different - from the fact that a person becomes a sociopath and to the fact that he has to undergo a long course of rehabilitation in psychiatric hospitals.

What needs to be done in order to prevent the victory of loneliness over your "I", or, in simple terms, how not to go crazy from loneliness?

I offer such a small instruction that will help you get out of this dark state, just remember that working on yourself is always hard and the result will never be noticeable immediately. For this, the main thing is needed - time, patience and inner determination.

Instruction

There is a huge gap between the words "loneliness" and "solitude". Are you sure that your condition is loneliness? Maybe now the time has simply come when your soul demanded solitude? Try to figure it out.

If you have determined that what you feel is the most loneliness, then do the following:

We go out to people. This means that you do not need to lock yourself within the four walls of your apartment and constantly “scroll” compassionate thoughts about yourself unfortunate in your head. We gather and go to a cafe, a theater, a museum. We attend exhibitions, open seminars, public readings. We sign up for yoga, refresher courses or a dance studio. In general, we are moving. Hard? I do not argue. But here you have two decisions - either sail where the wind blows, or make your life do what you need. The choice is yours.
Get a pet. And better than one that requires constant attention - a Vietnamese pig, for example. Or, more simply, a dog. Here you really want it, you don’t want it, but you have to go out for a walk, and communicate with animal lovers and, quite likely, visit cynological clubs.
A hobby is also such a thing that helps not to go crazy with loneliness. Everyone has their own hobby - someone collects matchboxes, someone Teddy bears, and someone really likes to look for treasures. What have you always wanted to do? Now is the time when you are quite capable of making your dream come true.
Reading helps you rethink your life and reassess your priorities. So read on health, it will only get better. The period of loneliness will pass, and the accumulated knowledge and useful information will remain with you. (See article "")
Try your hand at art. Let your paintings be not too beautiful and made in dark colors, you are not going to exhibit them in the Gallery. With each new drawing, the paint on it will become lighter and brighter, which means that life will begin to flourish.
Get into the habit of taking pictures of sunrises. This will have a very positive effect on your inner state.
Get a notebook where you write down your thoughts. At first, of course, there will be only tearful and compassionate quotes, but then deeper thoughts will appear. Who knows, maybe you will become the new Montaigne or Nietzsche, and your aphorisms will add to the collection of the most famous sayings?
Go somewhere on vacation - you can go to your native country, or you can “wave” to distant countries. It is likely that your loneliness is exactly that chance that falls once in a lifetime in order to meet your soul mate or radically change your life.
Make a list of the benefits of your current state. For example:
- A lot of free time that can be used for something worthwhile;
- No restriction in desires and actions;
- Complete freedom from others - you don’t need to adapt to anyone’s opinion.
Limit your time on the Internet. All "friends" in social networks are just a myth with which you "warm your soul" for yourself. It's just an illusion of need and demand. Get rid of her.

Here is the instruction I got. Choose from it what appeals to you the most, and start doing it. And you can do everything strictly according to the points. Most likely, you will not even get to the sixth, as you will feel that loneliness has given up its positions and you have not been visited by thoughts about how not to go crazy from loneliness for a long time.

Do not focus on this state, accept it as a fact. Everything in this life is given to us for some reason, and our task is to understand this, draw conclusions and start a new life. I am sure that loneliness is the moment at which the most important decision in life is made, a goal appears, its comprehension and a clear prioritization. Consider your loneliness as preparation for a happy joyful life, and everything will be fine with you! Good luck!

Alone with myself, I do not get lonely:

I am a very interesting conversationalist

wise friend and, in general,

versatile person.

Loneliness. Many, once in such a situation, are ready to climb the walls and whine at the moon. They are terrified of being alone. It seems that the ceiling is crushing and the walls are coming together. Stuffy, scary, terribly unpleasant. How not to go crazy with loneliness? Where to put your irrepressible soul? What to do with a restless body?

Loneliness is the only way to know yourself

How can you look inside yourself, being constantly surrounded by a crowd of people? What do you want? What are you striving for? What are you dreaming about? What are you capable of? What benefit can you bring to your loved ones?

We are sometimes unable to answer all these questions. Because we don't have time to think about it. Here are the higher powers and send us, lost in the crowd, loneliness.

There was such a case in my life. One of my acquaintances, a former colleague, an experienced teacher of the highest category, turned to a psychotherapist for help. With emotional stability, the person was all right, and no one observed mental abnormalities. This visit would not have been known if the woman had not been shocked by her discovery.

The next day, before the start of the working day, she could not calm down. The fact is that the therapist asked if she had a hobby.

Some of the colleagues understood her, and some just shrugged. It's actually scary! We live, we work, we communicate. And we are so absorbed in everyday problems, work duties and the worries of our friends that we forget about ourselves. Most of us do minimal brain work. Moreover, earthly problems. There is no time to think about higher spheres.

No hobbies, no dreams, no goals. Where we are going? What for? Unclear. And loneliness is an opportunity to look into your own soul, into your own heart, to rethink your life. The forced rejection of the informational background is very useful. It's important to understand this. Then the question will not arise: how not to go crazy from loneliness?

Loneliness is an opportunity for self-development

With an interesting person, you will never be lonely. With him there is something to talk about and dream about. There is a lot to do with him. If you feel lonely, you should think about your self-development. You have to be interesting.

Develop from different angles:

Creative. Find a way to express your thoughts, emotions, feelings, experiences. Throw out your suffering and throwing into any creations. The process itself will make you forget about loneliness.
Intellectually. Get your brain busy.
- Do mental exercises.
- Study countries, continents, the behavior of our smaller brothers. You can visit the museum, go to a neighboring city and take a walk in historical places.
- Get involved in foreign languages. "Attend" English lessons via Skype, learn French or German with a self-study.
- Solve chess problems, mathematical equations.

How not to go crazy with loneliness? Take your hands and load your body

A good way to get rid of negative thoughts is to get busy. Do a deep clean of the garage or basement, dig up the vegetable garden, clean the carpets, or fix the furniture.

Go in for sports. Exhausting your body with daily workouts, healthy activity and proper nutrition, as a rule, normalizes the state of affairs in the head. There is no time to suffer from loneliness, if every morning - a run, six times a week - a gym, and in the evening - a vegetable salad and a glass of kefir.

What can not be done?

Get drunk, go to a club with a dubious friend, or indulge in carnal pleasures with a random partner. Such behavior will not relieve loneliness. And an unpleasant aftertaste on the soul will remain.

Instruction

Don't avoid interacting with people, even if you don't feel like seeing anyone. Meet your relatives from time to time or just go to the movies. It is best if your child becomes your friend. It doesn't matter if it's your nephew or the boy next door. After a couple of months of communicating with children, you will notice how your heart melts, that you become a more sociable and cheerful person.

Get a puppy of your favorite breed. He will rejoice at your every visit home, spend evenings with you. You will have someone to take care of, and he will have someone to play with. With the right upbringing, he will remain devoted to you for life. In addition, the dog will need to be taken out regularly, and this is a way to once again take a walk in the park and make new acquaintances. Among dog lovers there are people of different ages and interests, in addition, there are clubs where cynologists are, as well as dog shows and competitions.

Go headlong into work, and spend the earned money and bonuses on gifts for yourself and your family. If you have a strained relationship with loved ones, volunteer. Finally get yourself what you always wanted. The less time you have for idleness, the less often thoughts of loneliness will come to you. Expand your knowledge - sign up for courses. It doesn't matter if it's investment courses or belly dance training, the main thing is that you like what you do.

If your health and financial situation allows you, go on a trip. At the same time, it is not necessary to fly to exotic islands or climb snow-capped mountains. But in your power to finally admire the Eiffel Tower, Lake Baikal or ride along the Golden Ring of Russia. The more distances you cover, the more interesting your life will become. And since you can’t do without acquaintances on a trip, it will turn out to be even more enjoyable.

“Either I'm crazy, or the whole world has gone”, - this is how the great physicist Albert Einstein, who created the theory of relativity, argued. Indeed, the very concept of "madness" is very relative: what for one will seem ingenious, another will consider insane and abnormal. It is believed that most of the great discoveries were made by people with certain mental disabilities.

Instruction

The creator who paints the picture of your life is you. It is you who determine its quality. And only you can decide which way you will go: the way of an inventor who breaks stereotypes, or a simple happy person living a calm, measured life. Assess your strengths.

In difficult times, music and art have always helped mankind. During the war, people gathered together and sang, and this helped them to remain human. Try to sing too, listen to your favorite music. It is desirable that it be kind and life-affirming, and not heavy and destructive.

Regular sleep is essential for mental health. You need to sleep as much as your body needs. Usually a person needs 6-8 hours to recover. Brain activity during sleep is minimal, while working capacity is restored. Not only sleep is important, but also a stable daily regimen in general.

March 8 ... I'm sitting at home. One. 26 years. No kids. Two marriages over the years. The first husband turned out to be bisexual, who wanted to explore the "world of sex" without me or with me, but what if there were a lot of us. I couldn't live with it.

The second was like a "transitional staircase". In comparison with the first, I immediately fell in love. A year has passed and my newly-made husband tried to re-register MY house, MY car and MY land to his mother without my knowledge. For a long time he did not torment me, he told the truth that he needed money (to live more calmly, without any necessary goal), but he really loves me and that he does not want to disperse. We parted for a month, during which time he managed to make the child our mutual friend, who is much more profitable than me and my family. I didn’t interfere with them ... I never considered myself beautiful, but here everyone unanimously says the opposite, that there is something inexplicable in me that attracts men so much. I myself can see how they "circle". But there is no happiness at all.

A year ago, I started dating an old friend, I thought that he definitely would not betray. They began to live together. We lived for half a year and he told me that he loves me, but he wants to marry only after 35 (he is 25) and it will be so even if I get pregnant. And even if this happens, it is not a fact that we will not think about the future fate of the fetus. He talked with dad and dad did not want a serious relationship for his son yet. Dad is a rich Jew. So it was simply said, over the use of mashed potatoes and chops with tomatoes.

Now, like 2 months I have MCH or not MCH, I myself do not know who treats me well, attentive when necessary, caring but does not let me close. He says that it would not hurt later when everything is over. He said that tomorrow we were going to his friends in Velegozh Park, that it would be cool there and I should like it, sauna, swimming pool, romance ...

I don't even want to analyze it (in the sense of MCH). I don't have the strength. I've never felt so bad before. I understand that no one dies with me, that everyone is alive and well. But my emotional state scares me. I don't want to eat, I don't want to sleep, I don't want to wake up. I have nothing to cling to. I always believed that I would have EVERYTHING. Now there is no strength even to believe, it seems that you are only “feeding” yourself with illusions. Yes, there are friends, of course, but there is no one to walk with. ALL friends are behind her husband. Who is not, with those I do not want. Drinking and clubs. I don’t even want to think why the MCH didn’t stop by, didn’t give flowers to me. He says everything will be tomorrow. No, he's not doing anything. At home all day. He just said before that he was afraid to get close, so that it would not hurt me later. I said that NOW he is not doing pleasantly and you need to think about it.

I don't know, I have no alternative. And strength too. You don't want to live ahead of everything. What's wrong with me? I am ready for any criticism in my address. How can I consistently attract all sorts of "weird" men? I don't have planks, I'm an ordinary Muscovite, longing for comfort, family and children. I am stuck in this state. I want family! I want to give my care to someone. On March 8, many wrote to me that I deserve this incomprehensible female happiness. And when will it be? How not to go crazy from loneliness and no need for anyone?