Why you need to know your core values in life. Daily temptations in everyone's life
It happens that in matters of self-determination, people listen to anyone but themselves - to friends, parents, teachers or leaders. They blindly follow the expectations that society makes. And sometimes this abstract idea of compliance with the requirements becomes a personal tragedy of a person. For example, a female manager can work in her company for about five years, receive a good salary, and be respected by her colleagues. At the same time, her husband and parents will approve her career. But every morning, when she comes to the workplace, she will feel disgusted with her work. And soon this disgust will grow into hostility towards other employees and, in general, towards the walls of the employing company.
If a person is wondering how to find his place in life, then at least he realizes that he does not occupy this place at the moment. Such a situation is not uncommon. But the task of getting out of it can be a real challenge. If a person is in the wrong place, even a long vacation is unlikely to help. Therefore, in order to change something in your own life, sometimes you have to neglect the opinions of others, and - oh, horror! - their comfort.
It's good if our imaginary office heroine has a clear understanding of where she wants to go. For example, she enjoys knitting, for which she has time a couple of times a year - after the celebration of the New Year and on the third weekend of the May holidays. Then she can at least start saving money and develop a plan for opening a future online knitwear store. Or, having quit her job, she can start knitting things to order, holding master classes.
But what if a person is not only out of place, but also does not know what his life's work is? Let's look at a few ways to help you find your calling.
Determine the source of pleasure
The first thing to do in this search is to identify the occupations that give pleasure. At these moments, according to the definition of psychologist Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi, the author of the concept of "flow", time flies very quickly, a person feels full from his activity. To find a vocation, one must not simply choose for oneself one or another profession in which one can play a certain social role. The search for a vocation and realization in the profession are not two identical processes. To find his destiny, a person needs to understand what he would like from his life, and not what kind of social mask he needs to put on.
look outside
But keep in mind that the source of inspiration is always outside. They say that you need to look for a calling in your own inner world. However, sitting in the lotus position and meditating for days on end, he is not to be found. The simplest thing to do is to turn to the outside world, try as many different activities as possible. And after that, determine which of them is the most exciting.
- On this topic:
Reveal multiple areas
Many people think that their calling should be in one particular thing. In fact, sometimes this happens - a person wakes up in the morning and realizes that more than anything in the world he wants to paint pictures, play the harp or paint Christmas decorations. But this is not always the case. People can do one thing, then, having had enough, or even having experienced emotional burnout, they go to a completely different area. This often happens, for example, with educators and psychologists. What seemed like a life's work took too much energy to continue doing it any further. In addition, it is not always possible to put an equal sign between a life purpose and a source of income.
How to find yourself in life, and understand what to do? To do this, it may be necessary to highlight several areas of activity.
Each person should be able to provide for himself. And this work does not always coincide with the vocation. A subtle point should be taken into account here: in this case, an income-generating job should allow you to do what you love while it is at the stage of a hobby.
Passion for the cause and the demands of the world
It is necessary to be able to correlate your skills and hobbies with the requirements of the modern labor market. This is one of the most profitable strategies. For example, a passion for dancing can be turned into a source of income by getting a job as an instructor in the nearest club, or even opening your own school.
Sometimes it happens that a person considers himself a creative person, whose talent turned out to be unclaimed in a cruel world. Then he needs to once again reconsider the ways in which he implements it. For example, some artists fundamentally refuse to receive special education, or work in the design field, stating that for them, drawing is something more than satisfying the needs of customers.
However, in this case, the question of finding a vocation takes on a different character - after all, you can become a truly highly paid and sought-after professional only if you have talents and abilities in a certain area. Refusing to earn money through the use of their talents, a person narrows down his choice much. After all, one way or another, he will have to earn a living with the help of routine work, in which he has no interest.
It is possible to consider further the example of the "free artist". Such a person could really get a design education and get good money working in a company. This would not prevent him from continuing to engage in "high art" in his spare time.
So, finding your place in life is a complex task, especially for an adult. Changing the field of activity is a responsible step. It is even more difficult to understand in which direction to move. However, having managed to find your true place under the sun, you can turn gray monotonous everyday life into a bright, eventful life.
(1906-1999) - Soviet and Russian philologist, culturologist, art critic, academician of the Russian Academy of Sciences (AN USSR until 1991). Chairman of the Board of the Russian (Soviet until 1991) Cultural Fund (1986-1993). Author of fundamental works on the history of Russian literature (mainly Old Russian) and Russian culture. Here is a fragment from the book: Likhachev D.S. Letters about kindness. - St. Petersburg: Nauka, Logos, 2006.
What is the sense of life
You can define the purpose of your existence in different ways, but there must be a purpose - otherwise it will not be life, but vegetation. You have to have principles in life. It’s good to even state them in a diary, but in order for the diary to be “real”, you can’t show it to anyone - write only for yourself. Every person should have one rule in life, in his goal of life, in his principles of life, in his behavior: one must live life with dignity, so that one is not ashamed to remember. Dignity requires kindness, generosity, the ability not to be a narrow egoist, to be truthful, a good friend, to find joy in helping others.
For the sake of the dignity of life, one must be able to refuse small pleasures and considerable ones too ... To be able to apologize, admit a mistake to others is better than play up and lie. When deceiving, a person first of all deceives himself, because he thinks that he has successfully lied, but people understood and, out of delicacy, kept silent. Lies are always visible. People have a special feeling that they are lying to them or telling the truth. But there is no evidence, and more often - I don’t want to get involved ...
Nature created man for many millions of years, until it created it, and this creative, constructive activity of nature must, I think, be respected, we must live life with dignity and live in such a way that nature, working on our creation, is not offended. Nature is creative, it created us, therefore we must support this creative trend, creativity in our life and in no case support everything destructive that exists in life. How to understand this, how to apply it to your life, each person should answer this individually, in relation to his abilities, his interests, etc. But you need to live by creating, to maintain creativity in life. Life is varied, and consequently, creation is also varied, and our striving for creativity in life should also be varied according to our abilities and inclinations. How do you think?
In life, there is some level of happiness from which we count, as we count height from sea level. Starting point. So, the task of each person, both in large and small ways, is to increase this level of happiness, to increase it in life. And his personal happiness also does not remain outside of these worries. But mainly - those around you, those who are closer to you, whose level of happiness can be increased simply, easily, without worries. And besides, it means raising the level of happiness of your country and all of humanity in the end. The methods are different, but something is available for everyone. If the solution of state issues is not available, which always increases the level of happiness, if they are wisely resolved, then this level of happiness can be increased within your working environment, within your school, in the circle of your friends and comrades. Everyone has such an opportunity.
Life is, first of all, creativity, but this does not mean that every person, in order to live, must be born an artist, ballerina or scientist. Creativity can also be created. You can simply create a good atmosphere around you, as they say now, an aura of goodness around you. For example, a person can bring into society an atmosphere of suspicion, some kind of painful silence, or he can immediately bring joy, light. This is what creativity is. Creativity is continuous. So life is eternal creation. A person is born and leaves a memory behind. What kind of memory will he leave behind? This needs to be taken care of not only from a certain age, but, I think, from the very beginning, since a person can leave at any moment and at any moment. And it is very important what kind of memory he leaves about himself.
Last update:6/02/17
Every person has such days when he is overcome by doubts whether he lives this way, whether he does what he does. He asks himself questions: why do I live, why do not everything turn out the way I want. Such vague anxieties and feelings that you are going somewhere wrong, that you are doing something wrong, do not give you the opportunity to enjoy life.
To sort through these doubts, ask yourself a few questions: What is important to you in life? What do you value most in people? What do you value in yourself? What must be present in your life for you to feel happy? What principles do you think should not be abandoned? What kind life values Do you think main?
If you want to understand yourself, you will first need to understand your system. life values. Make a list of everything without which you feel your life is meaningless. Write what life values already in your life, and what should be.
Most core values in life each person:
1. Health: the stronger your health, the happier you are. Health is the most important thing to appreciate in life, and what needs to be constantly taken care of.
2. Love: there should be love in every person's life. It's great if you have a loved one. But perhaps it is the love of your parents for you or your love for your parents, love for children, love for your neighbor, and finally, it is love for yourself.
3. Family: what could be more important than a happy family life?
4. Friendship: do not forget how important it is for you to understand how important the support of friends is, how much they mean to you.
5. Success: for you it can be a job, a career, respect and recognition, material well-being. Answer the questions: What does success mean to you? What does it mean to you to be successful?
As you can imagine, this is not all. life values, and for you they may not be main. You can write on your list: a stable financial situation, confidence in the future. Another person will write: personal development, spiritual values, self-realization. The third will write: youth, beauty, travel. And it will set priorities in a completely different way.
Write down everything that you value in life, if possible, trying not to miss anything. Explore the list and choose from it main For you life values. Write them down as they decrease in importance. Those life values, which took the first 7-9 lines of the list, and there are your core values in life. Now think about whether you pay most of your attention to these values, whether you spend your time and energy on them. If you realize that you are busy with completely different things, it will become clear to you why doubts come to you. It will become clear to you why you do not feel absolutely happy - you are serving not your own, but other people's values, or those values that are far from the first places on your list.
Try to change your life! that's why they are called the main ones, because they mean much more to us than others, they are our beacons in life, and allow us to make sure that we are moving in the right direction!
The main values in the life of every personWhat is the sense of life? How to live a full and happy life? What is truly valuable in life? Am I living right? These are the main questions that we are all trying to find the answer to ... In this article, I (the author of the article) offer you a new opportunity to reconsider your life priorities and find answers to these "eternal" questions for yourself.
When I became seriously interested in this topic and began to search, I found that the best answers to these questions are given to us by people who in their lives have come face to face with their death.
I studied bestselling books about people who found out they were going to die very soon and changed their priorities in life; collected various studies on the topic “what one regrets before death”; added a bit of oriental philosophy and as a result this list of five true values \u200b\u200bwas obtained in the life of every person.
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If not for my illness, I would never have thought about how wonderful life is.
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originality
Everything in life has its purpose. Every living being on the planet has its own mission. And each of us has a role to play. Realizing our unique talents and abilities, we gain happiness and wealth. The path to our uniqueness and mission lies through our desires and dreams since childhood,
Individuality is the highest value in the world.
Osho.
One woman (Bronnie Wee) worked for many years in a hospice, where her task was to alleviate the mental state of dying patients. From her observations, she revealed that the most common regret people have before death is the regret that they did not have the courage to live the life that was right for them, and not the life that others expected from them. Her patients regretted that they never realized many of their dreams. And only at the end of the journey did they realize that this was only a consequence of their choice, which they had made.
Make a list of your talents and abilities, as well as a list of favorite things in which they are expressed. This is how you find your unique talents. Use them to serve others. To do this, ask yourself as often as possible: “How can I be useful (to the world, to the people I come into contact with)? How can I serve?
Quit the job you hate! Do not be afraid of poverty, failures and mistakes! Trust yourself and don't worry about the opinions of others. Always believe that God will take care of you. It’s better to take a risk once than to regret later that you lived a gray and mediocre life, “killing yourself” at an unloved job to the detriment of yourself and your loved ones.
Always remember that you are unique and your mission is to give the best of your uniqueness to the world. Only then will you find true happiness. That's what God intended.
Discover your divinity, find your unique talent, and you can create any wealth you want.
Deepak Chopra
Self-discovery and spiritual growth
Stop being an animal!.. Of course, we need to satisfy physiological needs, but only in order to develop spiritually. People are mainly chasing material well-being and are concerned, first of all, with things, and not with the soul. Then, as the primary meaning and purpose of human life is to realize that he is a spiritual being and, in fact, he does not need anything material.
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We are not human beings having spiritual experiences from time to time. We are spiritual beings having a human experience from time to time.
Deepak Chopra
Realize God within you. Man is a transitional being from the animal to the spiritual. And each of us has the resources to make this transition. Practice the state of "Being" more often, when you have no thoughts and you do not need anything, when you simply feel life and enjoy its fullness. The state of “here and now” is already a spiritual experience.
There are people among us, not many, but there are those who understand that it is necessary to start saving money for old age even at a time when it is far away, so that a certain amount has time to accumulate ... So why not take care of what is more important than money, oh soul?
Eugene O'Kelly, Chasing the Elusive Light
And there is no need to improve yourself, you are already perfect because you are spiritual beings. Engage in self-discovery.
To know oneself as well as possible in order to be as big as possible for the world is the most important task of man.
Robin Sharma
Even when you reach your goals, true success is not about the achievement, but about the changes in consciousness that occur as an inevitable consequence of your progress toward those goals. It's not about achieving goals, but about what happens to you in the process of achieving it.
openness
How often, in the face of death, people regret that they never had the courage to express love to their near and dear ones! They regret that they often suppressed their emotions and feelings because they were afraid of the reaction of others. They regret not allowing themselves to be happier. Only at the end of the journey did they realize that to be happy or not is a matter of choice.
Every moment we choose a reaction to this or that situation, and each time we interpret events in our own way. Be carefull! Watch your choice every moment.
What goes around comes around.
folk wisdom
What needs to be done to become more open?
Give free rein to your emotions and feelings. Ride the coolest attraction and scream at your pleasure; share your feelings with other people; become an optimist - rejoice, laugh, have fun, no matter what.
Accept yourself and life as it is. Allow yourself to be who you are and let things happen. Your task is to dream, move and watch what miracles life brings you. And if something does not turn out the way you wanted, then it will be even better. Just relax and enjoy.
I die and rejoice. And I'm going to have fun every day I have.
Randy Pausch "The Last Lecture"
Love
Sadly, many people only in the face of death realize how little love was in their lives, how little they rejoiced and enjoyed the simple joys of life. The world has given us so many miracles! But we are too busy. We cannot take our eyes off our plans and current concerns to look at these gifts and enjoy them.
Love is food for the soul. Love is to the soul what food is to the body. Without food, the body is weak; without love, the soul is weak.
Osho
The best way to raise the wave of love in your body is gratitude. Start thanking God for everything that he gives you every moment: for this food and a roof over your head; for this fellowship; beyond that clear sky; for everything you see and get. And when you catch yourself getting irritated, immediately ask yourself, “Why should I be grateful now?” The answer will come from the heart, and, believe me, it will inspire you.
Love is the energy from which the world is woven. Become a missionary of love! Give people compliments; charge everything you touch with love; give more than you get...and move through life from the heart, not from the head. It will guide you on the right path.
A path without a heart is never joyful. You have to work hard just to get there. On the contrary, the path that has a heart is always easy; it doesn't take much effort to fall in love with him.
Carlos Castaneda
Relations
When life passes and in everyday worries we often lose sight of our relatives and friends, at the end of the journey we will feel devastation, deep sadness and longing ...
Spend as much time as you can with those you love and appreciate. They are the most valuable thing you have. Always be open to communication and new acquaintances, it enriches. As often as possible, give people your attention and admiration for them - all this will return to you. With joy and disinterestedly help, give, and just as joyfully accept gifts from others.
Bliss is also contagious, like any disease. If you help others to be happy, by and large you are helping yourself to be happy.
Osho
Maxim Dudkin
(Word on the 19th week of Pentecost)
For many revelations, let me not exalt myself, give me a dirty trick of the flesh, aggel satan, let me do dirty tricks, let me not exalt myself ().
This is what St. apostle Paul. In addition to all the troubles and misfortunes, temptations and sorrows that he endured in preaching the Gospel of Christ, the Lord allowed him to undergo some more constant, everlasting temptation in his own body, so that this temptation constantly reminded him of human weakness, prompted him to humility and self-humiliation, not allowed him to be exalted by the extraordinary gifts with which the grace of God filled him, and by the great deeds that he accomplished by the power of the grace of God. What this temptation consisted of we do not know; but that it was not easy, is evident from the fact that the apostle thrice prayed to the Lord to depart from him; and that it is necessary and useful for the apostle, the Lord Himself showed, saying to his prayer: My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness ().
Life and each person cannot be, brethren, without temptations. There are grave, great temptations that are allowed by the Providence of God for special, unknown to us, intentions and for special purposes; but those who are led by the Lord in special ways to the highest perfection are subjected to these temptations. There are other kinds of temptations - everlasting, constant, not so noticeable, but nonetheless heavy and regrettable, which are all the more dangerous for our faith and hope, for our virtue and purity of conscience and heart, the less attention we pay to fighting with them and defeat them. We mean many different troubles, sorrows, annoyances, without which hardly anyone will spend even one day of his life. How many cases of displeasure and grief in the ordinary, daily life of everyone! In family and society, from enemy and friend, from acquaintance and stranger, with or without intention, for reasons and without reasons, sorrows are born incessantly, they meet you at almost every step. Are you satisfied with your condition? Your family members are unhappy with him and grumble at you. Do you wish well for your neighbor? Your neighbor wants good only for himself alone, and not for you or others. Are you diligent in your work, willing to work, expecting good success in your affairs? Your diligence is not appreciated, your work is not rewarded as it should be, obstacles are placed in your success. Are you calm at home? You are disturbed in society: good desires, intentions and deeds do not protect you from gossip and slander, this ordinary ulcer of society; the selflessness of your friendship does not save you from the self-interest of your friends. Are you restrained to your word? Others are intemperate and drag you into idle talk and slander. Are you afraid of offending someone? Others are not afraid to insult you on any occasion. And who can count all the cases of daily displeasure and grief? Children for parents, parents for children, subordinates for superiors, superiors for subordinates - one for the other in general, intentionally or unintentionally, only almost incessantly prepare new sorrows and annoyances.
It is from these sorrows and annoyances that the cross is composed, which we begin to bear before we know how to understand it, and we only lay down at the grave, when we cease to feel. It would be in vain to pray to the Lord, that He would deliver us from this cross, that this everlasting temptation would depart from us, this truly Aggel Satan, the Lord will also tell us, as He said to the Apostle: prevails to you my grace. That is why the grace of God is given to us so that we endure all the sorrows and sorrows that we encounter with meekness and patience, with complacency and obedience to the will of God, without which no temptation can overtake us, so that in this crucible of temptations our soul is cleansed of those living in it. sinful inclinations and passions, so that in this school of incessant grief and annoyance we may learn true Christian love, which endures and is merciful for a long time, does not get irritated and does not think evil, who loves her enemies, does good to those who hate her and prays for those who attack her(cf. ; ). That is why our Lord left us the image of His most luminous life, which was meek and humble in heart, do not reproach against the reproach, do not stop suffering, but betray the Judge righteously, let him follow His footsteps(), let us be sons of the Most High, who there are blessings on the graceless and evil ().
In order to succeed in this science of patience, meekness and love, it is necessary, my brethren, first of all to make sure that the main source and root of all grief and annoyance is not outside us, not in the people around us, but in ourselves, in our passionate nature, and where no matter how far we are from people, grief will follow us into the deepest solitude. “When I was in solitude,” one of the great ascetics says of himself, “and I had no one to be angry with, I was angry with the ax with which I chopped wood, with the vessel with which I drew water, with the rods from which I weaved koshniki.” Such is our fallen and passionate nature: it does not like to acknowledge its weaknesses and always seeks their guilt outside of itself. The proud one does not tolerate humiliation, and if he is humiliated through his own fault, he is annoyed at others. The vainglorious seeks undeserved honor and, when he does not receive it, is indignant with others. Selfish everywhere and would like to turn everything to his own advantage, and if he does not have time, he is angry with others. A lazy person does not like work, and when he suffers hardships for his laziness, he is also vexed with others. The angry one is irritated for no reason, the suspicious one is afraid of the ghosts created by his own imagination, the envious one is consumed by his own envy, the carnivorous one complains that everything is not to his liking - and each of them is not annoyed with himself, but with others. Meanwhile, if they were free from their passions, they would be free from all grief and annoyance: who will piss you off, says St. apostle: how else will you be good likenesses? ().
That is why, my brethren, these small but constant temptations are useful to us, because they bring out our innermost ailments, weaknesses, so that we ourselves can see what is hidden in our hearts. If we did not have these temptations, we could consider ourselves almost angels and would not ourselves suspect how much evil lurks in our hearts. But when sorrows penetrate our soul, when the troubles of life begin, so to speak, to taste our heart from different sides, then the passions that nest in it are revealed one after another, crawling out like snakes from their shelter. Whoever seemed meek to himself is angry and irritable. Whoever considered himself not envious, not conceited, not proud, not greedy, not carnivorous, envy is revealed, vanity is aroused, pride arises, greed is born, carnal pleasure develops. In a word, a whole horde of passions is revealed, which warring against the law of our minds and captivating us with the law of sin(cf.), which plunge us hourly and every minute into innumerable falls into sin - in word and deed, thought and desire.
Do not think, my brethren, that these everyday and, so to speak, ordinary sins of ours are unimportant, for even every idle word, even if men speak, they will render a word about it at the Judgment Seat of Christ(). The very multitude of them is already such a burden that will inevitably drag us into the bottom of hell; for into the kingdom of God nothing goes badly(). Their very commonness and incessant repetition in our lives shows that the very root of moral life—our heart—is impure and corrupt, but only pure in heart, they will see God(). Every sin, no matter how small it may seem, inflicts its wound on the Only Begotten Son of God, crucified for our sins, and makes the sinner guilty of His blood. Truly great is he who is not overcome by these, apparently, small temptations, but he himself overcomes them with meekness, patience, generosity; who overcomes evil with good, repays with love for insults, with good deeds for insults, blessing for grief, prayer for bitterness.
Of course, such a victory over oneself is not easy: for this it is necessary, as the Lord Himself teaches, deny yourself(cf. ; ), i.e. natural, but partial and impure love for oneself, sinful inclinations and aspirations innate to all of us, impure feelings and inclinations akin to our heart, you need to crush and defeat your self-love, completely and completely submit your mind and your will to the all-holy will of the Heavenly Father and the law of Christ ; in a word, it is necessary crucify your flesh with passions and lusts, as the holy apostle () says. Such a feat, coupled with incessant opposition to one's own concepts, inclinations and aspirations, with incessant hardships, sorrows and heart diseases, cannot but lead to despondency and cowardice. For this, we need to turn our gaze unceasingly to the Son of God crucified for our sins, who himself went the whole way of human temptations, Leave an image for us, let us follow His footsteps(), Are you grieved by slander and condemnation? But how many slanders and condemnations did our Lord endure? He, the most holy of holies, was called a poison and a wine-drinker, a friend of tax collectors and sinners; about His most beneficial miracles they said: about Beelzebub, the prince is demonic, cast out demons(). Are you upset and offended by word or deed? Remember, beloved, how many times you yourself offended the Lord with your sins, grieved His love and goodness with your ingratitude and opposition to His will; but He, merciful and many-merciful, still spares you, suffers long for you, lovingly awaits your repentance and is ready to forgive you all your sins: shouldn’t we also forgive our brother every sin of his against us? Are you bullied, harassed and persecuted? And how many persecutions, bitterness and torments did the Only Begotten Son of God endure for your sins? Should we sinners be offended, irritated and angry with our neighbors, no matter how and how they grieve us, when the Lord of glory Himself, crucified on the cross, prayed for His crucifiers?
When, thus, having armed ourselves with the power of the cross of Christ, we overcome all temptations, great and small, with meekness and patience, repay all the troubles, sorrows and annoyances of life with love, unmemorable malice and prayer, then without special great and difficult trials we will pass the path of our life. with Christ, and at last let us enter into the joy of our Lord. Amen.
Two heads and six legs; four walk, and two lie still
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