Everyone has black bars in life. We all once faced problems, our dreams did not come true, the colors faded, and life became simply unbearable. Despair overwhelmed everyone, and many could not withstand her onslaught and bent under her yoke. How to survive this difficult stage in life, how to deal with despair, is there a way to bring colors back to life? Let's think together how to deal with despair.

The main reasons that can drive a person to despair are pessimism, inability to resist problems, lack of willpower and self-pity. It is these factors that can often bring us to despair, to complete moral devastation, to a critical point. These causes are like symptoms of a disease. And if we learn to cope with them, then we will get rid of despair, as from an unpleasant disease. But how to do it, how to overcome these "symptoms"? It's very simple, ask yourself the question, do you like being in this state, or do you want better and more, want to enjoy life again and get rid of despair forever. I think the answer is obvious. Then pull yourself together and begin to act, begin to get rid of the causes of despair.

Let's start with one of the main causes of despair - pessimism. It is our inability to look at life joyfully, with a smile on our face, that often drives us to despair. And you must admit, when we are in a good mood, when we think positively, then we don’t even think about despair, sadness, sadness. And really, why, because everything is fine. Optimism and high spirits are the best cure for despair, do not forget this, and smile even when you are unbearably sad.

The inability to resist problems and difficulties also often makes us despair. Unfortunately, we often do not understand that problems will always accompany people. Not only, as it seems to us, us, but all people. Life is like that, nothing comes easy. We will not succeed in defeating all problems, but we can change our attitude towards them. Start treating problems with wisdom, let them become not an obstacle for you, but a lesson, a lesson in life. It is this attitude that helps not only to fight despair, but also to gain life experience, because it is not in vain that they say, “people learn from mistakes”.

Often the cause of despair can be a lack of willpower. It is this reason that often drives us to despair, because in order to regain a good mood again, it is sometimes enough to take one step. True, it is precisely this step that lacks the spirit and willpower. We are afraid of what will follow this step, we are afraid of the unknown, we are afraid that everything will be much worse. But what's worse than despair? Don't be afraid to take the first step towards change, sometimes it can change more than we think.

Self-pity, excessive selfishness, selfishness also often drive people to despair. Such people think, “how is it, we are so good, but they don’t like us so much ?!”. And they are not loved because they cannot love in return. Well, if not love, then at least respect other people. As you know, people treat us the way we treat them, and if we do not respect others, we will never achieve respect ourselves. Change your attitude towards yourself, learn to see, and most importantly correct your shortcomings, and respect the dignity of other people. This will certainly help you get rid of despair and, moreover, find yourself true friends, and they are worth a lot.

From all of the above, one general conclusion can be drawn: despair arises from a wrong attitude towards life and towards oneself. If you learn to treat life correctly, with wisdom, with willpower, with respect for yourself and for what surrounds you, you will quickly realize that life is not so bad. And understanding this will help get rid of despair for a long time. Good luck!

Luc de Clapier Vauvenargues

Many of us in our lives have experienced a state of complete despair, in which a person can alternately experience feelings such as rage, anger, horror, fear, panic, uncertainty, insecurity and hopelessness. At the same time, some people in a state of despair are more prone to violent panic, others to depression and apathy. Despair is an affective state characterized by a negative emotional background. It occurs when a person feels that he is at an impasse and does not know what to do. He cannot solve some important problem, he is not able to satisfy his need, he is not able to realize his desire. And if a person refuses to continue the struggle, he falls into a desperate state. Quite often, despair leads people to depression, from which they cannot get out for a long time without outside help. In this article, we will talk with you about how to deal with despair and regain self-confidence.

In order to cope with such conditions as despair, and even better, to prevent them from occurring at all, a person needs to be aware of his capabilities. Usually I have seen such a sequence of emotional states in desperate people: panic, anger, anger, then again panic, fear, horror, and finally hopelessness, despondency and apathy. This shows how people first try to fight, and then just give up and fade away. Therefore, a person needs to know what feelings he experiences most often when he finds himself in an impasse and how they affect him. Everyone can get angry, everyone can panic - this is a normal reaction, it is difficult to avoid it. The only question is how to learn to control this reaction so as not to let it plunge you into an even less controlled emotional state. For example, in those situations when a person is overcome by anger, he needs to return himself to a calm state, catching himself thinking that anger controls him and you need to get rid of it. That is, you need to stop identifying yourself with anger. And when a person experiences fear, he needs to start analyzing it. Fear needs to be studied - the more you learn about it, the faster it will begin to lose its power. When a person comes to a state of hopelessness, he should think about the opportunities that he has acquired due to the circumstances. In other words, it is possible to experience certain events in which people usually fall into despair in a different way - not in the way that our thoughts and feelings force us to do it. It is important not to allow the initial reaction and primary emotions to set off a chain of new emotions and negative thoughts that will start to snowball, plunging the person into an ever deeper state of despair. After all, the most important thing that a person needs in order not to fall into this painful state is to continue to fight, or, in cases where this is impossible, to accept a new reality, come to terms with it and begin to look for their joys and their happiness in it.

Let's now think about why it is so difficult for people to cope with despair, which forces them to succumb to emotions and, in fact, drive themselves into a dead end. The answer, in my opinion, is that they are simply not trained to behave correctly in certain situations. Hence the difficulty in controlling those emotional states that arise in these situations. We are used to living with hope and expectation for the best and do not like to consider negative options for the development of certain events, which means we do not mentally prepare ourselves for them. You can understand people - negative scenarios frighten and take a lot of energy to think about. However, hiding from a possible problem means disarming yourself in front of it. This is not worth doing. Fear needs to be able to face it. Difficulties need to be able to look in the eyes. Therefore, a person needs to accustom himself to see the bad, what a person usually fears and avoids even in his thoughts. This is not such a difficult job, you can do it yourself, or you can also with the help of a specialist who will gradually lead you to the acceptance of those thoughts that you usually avoid, immerse you in certain states and tell you how, being in one or another state, you should behave. In other words, friends, you need to be ready for something that can plunge you into despair in order to control yourself in this state and not fall into it at all. Psychological readiness for everything that can happen in life is of great importance for self-control. And people usually avoid everything that scares them, even in their thoughts, and therefore cannot cope with themselves when something in their life goes wrong.

Try to work with your psyche, train it. If you are not in a state of despair, but admit the possibility that you may encounter it, then think about what can have a strong negative impact on your life, for which you are absolutely not ready now? Be sure to consider the option of a situation that, with all your desire, cannot be corrected and try to mentally come to terms with it. Relive in your imagination possible losses, blows of fate, difficulties, serious problems, and so on. Immerse yourself in absolute negativity. If you find it difficult to imagine situations in which you will feel very bad, then try to remember something bad that you have already experienced in the past or read about those difficult situations that other people found themselves in and put yourself in their place. The better you imagine such situations, the more realistic they will seem to you. Our brain does not distinguish reality from imagination, so you can properly train your psyche, preparing it for imaginary difficulties and blows of fate, so that later in reality, when faced with them, you do not fall into despair.

Also, friends, it is very important not to depend on anyone in this life, so that it does not happen that someone does not live up to your expectations. Unfortunately, this is the problem of many people - who fall into despair mainly because of other people. For example, someone's betrayal can become a real disaster for a person, and not knowing what to do, what to do, how to live on, he will fall into despair. The problem here is not so much in the betrayal itself, but in the shock that a betrayed person experiences. After all, when we get too close to people, when we begin to depend on them, primarily spiritually and psychologically, we begin to feel like a part of these people. We merge with them and cannot even imagine life without them. And when they betray us, something in us dies, something that connected us with these people, with a specific person. Our whole fairy-tale world is collapsing, and we find ourselves at the very bottom of a damp, dark and dirty well, where we fall into despair, break down and put an end to our lives. But it shouldn't be like that. Dependencies must be avoided. I advise you to consider all the people around you as potential traitors and think over the course of your actions in case these people betray you. Think about how you will live without them, how you will take care of yourself. I know that this is not easy and I understand how hard it is to even think about it, but it needs to be done. We must be able to do without other people. After all, people can not only betray us, they can still die, leaving us not of their own free will. And we must be ready for this. Everyone should be prepared to be alone.

When people turn to me with a request to help them become more psychologically resilient to various kinds of shocks, then we do exactly this with them - we strengthen their psyche by modeling various negative situations in which these people may find themselves and think over their action plan in these situations. In particular, I teach them to live without those people they cannot imagine life without. So you can save yourself from all those negative feelings that arise during times of despair. You just need to experience them in advance, having learned to live in different realities.

Another very important point that desperate people need to consider is their own imagination. It can play out in such a way that, on the whole, a harmless situation seems like a catastrophe and plunges a person into despair. Imagination often fails people. They can imagine such a thing for themselves that even the harshest reality will seem like paradise, compared to their terrible fantasies. People very quickly succumb to a negative mood and begin to wind themselves up. To prevent this from happening, you need to divert your imagination with other thoughts, you need to occupy it with something else that is not related to the problem that the person is facing. Do you know how often it is useful to occupy your imagination when it tries to make an elephant out of a molehill? - Other problems. This is very useful because it allows you to look at your situation with different eyes. This is a kind of comparison of their problems with others, more difficult, which cause people much more suffering. You feel bad, and other people can feel even worse. It's hard for you, it's even harder for others. You have problems, but people can have dozens of times more of them, and they somehow live with them and even solve them. Think about it - look at life more broadly. The point here is not that other people's problems, other people's difficulties, other people's pain and suffering can bring you joy, although this warms the soul for someone, the contrast between your life and the lives of other people is important here - those people who are even more difficult than you . Your problems, your losses, your difficulties, your pain - should fade against the backdrop of even greater problems, difficulties, losses and pain. This is the meaning of switching attention to other people's problems and other people's difficulties. Let your imagination, succumbing to negative emotions, paint other people's lives in dark colors so that you can more easily perceive your own situation.

Well, the last thing that helps me personally to cope well with conditions close to despair is the understanding that everything that happens in our life, one way or another, leads us to the better. For some, this is faith in the best, but for me it is an understanding of the laws of life. I know that for many people this position is not easy to accept. Some things that happen to us in this life, well, do not indicate that because of them our life will change for the better. But believe me, everything has its own meaning, there is a purpose. Life directs people in a certain direction, so you need to be attentive to all its signs, signals, lessons. A lot of good is often hidden in the bad, but this good is not always visible. But some people notice, so they never lose heart, don't give up, don't despair. It is no coincidence that different people in the same situations behave differently. What one person sees as a problem, another sees as an opportunity. Where one person suffers, another enjoys life. Those situations in which one person gives up, the other continues to fight and wins. Life is wise - it will never give a person a nut that is too tough for him. Therefore, everything that happens to you is the trials that life has prepared for you and that you can overcome. There is no need to be afraid of what does not fit into your life scenario, you should not despair because of this. Let life take its course, do not resist its will. Better look hard for the meaning in the scenario that she offers you. And you will definitely find it. And having found this meaning, you will be delighted with everything that happens to you.

Many people often fall into despair because of a lack of understanding of the situation in which they find themselves, and which caused them this negative experience. They do not understand that life does not always have to develop according to their scenario and it cannot be completely controlled, because we do not know much about it. Therefore, you need to be able to put up with some things without being able to change them. Struggle is a struggle, but sometimes humility is necessary. Let life flow the way it needs to. Do not seek to change everything that you do not like, do not wish for everything that you do not have - save your nerves. After all, none of us knows how everything should really be arranged in this world and in our own life. Our thoughts always run ahead of reality - we want to see the next moment as we imagine it should be and are not ready for surprises. And for some reason, we believe that our expectations are often better than the reality that we do not want to accept. Perhaps the whole point is that we are not accustomed to living in a world of uncertainty and thinking more situationally, not being afraid of the unexpected. Therefore, when our plans are disrupted, when life does not turn out according to our scenario, we can fall into despair, instead of simply coming to terms with reality.

And yet we, humans, are prone to total negative generalization, which also strengthens and develops the state of despair. Many desperate people I have worked with quite often devalued their whole life, considering it to be unfortunate because of those problems, those failures, those difficulties, those losses, the pain that they faced in the present. But as it turned out later, in reality their life was different, much more interesting, bright, colorful and often quite happy. It's just that people in a state of despair begin to look at everything, including their past and even the future, through the prism of negativity. Their whole life becomes gloomy and meaningless. But in this prism there are always small bright spots through which you can get out, from the captivity of your own thoughts and experiences, in order to enjoy your life and regain your spiritual comfort.

So, friends, no matter what happens in your life, because of which you can fall into despair - look for positive moments in this. They are always there, trust me. And if you don't see them, then invent them - find a positive explanation for everything that happens to you. I am not asking you to be a blind optimist, I am simply suggesting that you take a broader view of life so that you maintain your composure in any situation. And try not to fall into the generalization trap. Separate the wheat from the chaff by analyzing your whole life. Then you will see that you have something to be proud of and something to rejoice at.

Complete despair: how to survive in the storm of life

September 22, 2017 - 2 comments

Complete despair overtakes when the irreparable happens and it seems that nothing can be changed. How to live on when bitter despair and longing torment the hearts of those abandoned by loved ones, how to survive despair for a person who has lost his job or livelihood and is seized with panic. But the most desperate may be the despair of those who are tired of struggling in search of the meaning of life. When despair sets in, the future seems to be in utter darkness.

Let's try for a moment to move away from difficult experiences and together see what caused the strongest despair, because understanding the reason, we also find a foothold. How to find a way out and overcome complete despair - we deal with the system-vector psychology of Yuri Burlan.

If despair is such a universal feeling, then maybe the means to fight despair can be just as universal? It happens.

Yuri Burlan reveals how the human psyche works, and these awareness of oneself and others, about the reasons for our actions and reactions, surprisingly, but quite naturally, give ground underfoot. Increase stress resistance and allow you to survive a difficult period. You realize why you feel bad, and you see your reserves, which in a state of complete despair can be difficult to feel. Let us analyze the problem of complete despair with examples.

The state of despair in a person who has lost love

The over-emotional and sensitive owner of the visual vector can be driven to despair by a break in an emotional connection, the loss of a loved one. And the stronger the connection was, the closer was the one whom the spectator lost, the stronger the despair of the person. Despondency sets in, it seems that you will never be able to love again. It is impossible to be in such a state for a long time, and then despair can be replaced by complete apathy in relation to love, a person can never love anyone in his whole life.

When this kind of despair overtakes, what should the desperate spectator do? Realize your nature, features, your destiny in this world with the help of systemic knowledge about the psyche. And although in moments of complete hopelessness and despair the whole world is not sweet, it is worth making an effort on yourself, getting out of the shell of experiences that, in fact, are focused on yourself, and be able to direct all your emotionality, pressing pain from the inside, to help another. Amazingly, this changes everything.

For a visual vector with an innate desire for compassion, empathy, for love, this is the only sure way to get rid of the feeling of despair at the thought that love is lost forever.

Here is what those who were able to overcome the despair of breaking an emotional connection write about this:

“... I was terribly afraid of him, to a noticeable uncontrollable trembling in my legs, arms, to a slight fainting. And at the same time it was an emotional and sexual addiction that went unnoticed and forever. I really wanted to leave, I left him. And this began ... I started training at the most decisive and difficult moment in my life. He could barely contain his aggression.

Everything that I heard at the training was not at all surprising, everything is so natural and real ... And at some point everything changed, I became the mistress of the situation. From nothing to the strength and desire to live. Unconsciously, already then (only now I realized this), I stopped provoking him at all and, moreover, at critical moments I said what he liked to say so. And in doing so, she protected herself. ..."

Desperate state of a man who lost money

Completely different reasons for despair in a person with a skin vector. Skinners are quite secretive, and it is not often possible to hear their requests for help, but still they can experience complete hopelessness from not knowing what to do next.

For the owner of the skin vector, it is very important to live better than others, to be the first in everything. A very important indicator of such a life is money. And if suddenly the skinner cannot earn enough money in any way, or for some reason loses the earned capital, this can plunge him into despair for a long time. A complete lack of understanding of where to go next makes life on the verge of despair not a life, but an existence.

When this kind of despair overtakes - what should the unfortunate skinner do? Deep despair in a person with a skin vector occurs in the same way as in a spectator - from the fact that a false thought arises about the impossibility of getting on his feet. It seems that along with money and position in society, some important particle of oneself is lost. However, it is not.

You can fight these obsessive thoughts with the help of full awareness of your properties at Yuri Burlan's training Systemic Vector Psychology. Innate qualities and properties do not disappear anywhere under the influence of external factors. Fear may appear, complete uncertainty about the future and one's actions, but the qualities received at birth by a person remain with him forever.

A man in despair: a way out of a bad state

To summarize, we can give a small list of tips for the owner of any vector in the case when despair overcomes:

• understand the cause that led to despair at a deep, unconscious level (at the level of vectors and innate properties);
• to realize your natural properties - this will allow you to find ways to slowly go outside, to realize yourself;
• act.

The most difficult thing is complete hopelessness experienced by a person with a sound vector, who suffers from a sense of the meaninglessness of life. When despair presses and the sound engineer does not know what to do, destructive methods can be used. For example, drugs. If the viewer can find love, and the skinner can find money in the world around us, then the sound engineer in search of the meaning of life can experience complete despair, because it seems that everything has already been tried, but nothing fills him with a sense of meaningfulness.

At the training System-Vector Psychology by Yuri Burlan, a person with a sound vector finds answers to his questions. Just like many have already done.

Despair is an emotion of varying duration and strength, reflecting the asthenic spectrum of feelings. Despair is a state of awareness of one's own helplessness in satisfying a need. From a strong shift in the psycho-emotional state during despair in a negative direction (up to clinical cases), it is natural to note its occurrence as a result of a strong shock or other influence that changed the usual life (death of loved ones, the collapse of overvalued ideas, etc.).

Such partially controlled or completely uncontrollable negative events confront a person with impotence, make them feel incapable of changing both the situation that has arisen and any life turn. Insignificant ones are able to spur development and, but the destruction of significant ties or events pushes into a feeling of hopelessness of the future, hopelessness, and a person plunges into an existential crisis due to the meaninglessness of existence.

Despair knocks a person away from past landmarks, and if at an early stage a person is able to critically perceive the situation, his state, notice the outgoing energy and is looking for how to get rid of despair, then after a while the strength and multidimensionality of this experience deprive a person of strength.

What is despair

Despair is a state of lack of hope and the ability to see prospects, a difficult emotional state, accompanied by a decline in physical strength. If you understand the origin of the word itself, then it reflects a long wait, accompanied by anxiety, which has great hopes in itself. In ancient times, such an expectation was on the hunt, when a person was in constant tension of strength and attention, sitting in ambush, and the beast still did not appear - the life of the tribe could depend on the outcome of this event, so it was not possible to leave, and the longer the time a person spent in ambush, the more strength he spent, and the less resource he had left to leave the waiting place.

Despair is a derivative of the word hope, which is synonymous with hope, and this aspect has been preserved in this word, but has acquired its distinctive moments for the modern world, where one does not need to lie in wait. However, the word reflects human hopes for a positive outcome of any situation (this may not threaten death for the whole family, but it is subconsciously perceived with approximately the same level of anxiety, triggering the same biochemical mechanisms as in distant ancestors).

It is possible to equate despair with hope only for a very rough comparison, since this concept contains a huge number of aspects, some of which (namely, hope for well-being) a person is able to realize and regulate, and some are located deep in the subconscious sphere, where the archaic processes of the psyche, entrenched like survival.

Despair includes (conscious or not), and the feeling of horror may be dictated by real events and possibilities, and may be exclusively in the sphere of unconscious reactions of the psyche. So, in despair at the death of her husband, she can play the main violin without being a conscious woman, since she lived a dependent life and does not know what to do with the surrounding reality, when in fact her husband was both protection and breadwinner for her (the skill of self-sufficiency has not been developed, which means , the world is threatening).

Despair can contain, most often growing out of the inability to take care of others (so men can fall into despair due to the inability to provide their family with a proper level of existence, because at an archaic level this is perceived as exposing them to a mortal threat and not fulfilling their own role as a leader).

Thus, the moment of the beginning of despair is the collapse of hopes, but then quite ancient mechanisms are activated that immerse a person in experiences that have no direct connection with the situation, but aggravate its experience to the limit, otherwise it would be a simple disappointment.

It is practically impossible to get rid of despair on your own, since secret, but large-scale processes are hidden not only from those around you, but also from the person experiencing it. So. If you yourself have felt a sense of hopelessness and meaninglessness in yourself, accompanied by any oppressive ones, then seek help and do not listen to the facilitating advice of your superficial acquaintances. It will not go away on its own, if you have already met with the loss of something important (and this is the main theme of despair), then you will have to live this experience, review your own life and make appropriate adjustments to it so that it is filled with meaning and a sense of living happening. Believing that a person experienced a similar event and felt normal after a couple of days can be dangerous, because your value systems are different. And while you are waiting for the pain and timelessness to let go of you, despair will drain your strength day by day and convince you of the immutability of the world and your asthenic self-perception in it.

If everything is all right with you, but you notice a strange prolonged melancholy, excessive suffering, then your task is to refer the person to a psychotherapist, and if he refuses, try to help on his own. Remember that the feeling of grief and sadness are natural, but the excess in duration or strength testifies precisely to despair, which is an overload for the psyche and nervous system. Such excessive mental stress, without appropriate adjustment, can lead to the development of neuropsychiatric and somatic diseases, as well as push a person to, as the only available way out of a state of terrible pain and nonsense. Remember that the ability to notice other ways out of the situation in a person in despair differs from the normal state, since vital areas were affected, perhaps personality-defining constructs were frustrated.

The reasons for the emergence of despair are two ways in a person’s life: excessive focus and giving special importance to any one value or goal (then, if it is lost, the whole world ceases to be important) and in the absence of a sense of the meaning of being as such, the connection of one’s own existence with higher matters and a harmonious combination of various spheres of one's own life (such confusion can, with its emotional instability, lead a person to despair). Therefore, maintaining the interest and significance of various areas of one's life, as well as a deep existential meaning in one's existence, regardless of what is happening, is the prevention of a state of despair.

How to deal with despair

No one can completely prevent despair in their own lives, but you can edit the factors that affect the likelihood of falling into despair from any situation. First of all, such a state is facilitated by the example of the parental family, which a person saw and unconsciously absorbed behavior patterns. Thus, if at the slightest failure you saw how the parent fell into despair, and did not look for ways to resolve the current situation or restructure his own life, then the chances of repeating this scenario in your performance increase. Not because of the reluctance to look for other options, but because of the lack of an example of how it is to look around. Perhaps a parent of the same sex as you was prone to an instant loss of hope and was preparing for the end of the world, while the other one decided a lot for him and showed ways out. Then, when identifying with the first one, falling into it will be a habitual stereotype, and also beneficial, because you can not take responsibility on your own, but wait for salvation. In this situation, there is a hidden resource - this is the behavior of the other parent and his coping strategies, which, like a slight falling into despair, are part of your inner experience, which must be awakened and updated. By the way, this is also true for those who have such behavior in the family was the norm for the majority - to find an example elsewhere, among friends and heroes.

The next feature of the psyche that can drive one into despondency is the tendency to constantly rewind events, a kind of getting stuck not so much for the sake of gaining experience, but for the sake of repeated living. This may concern positive moments, and then the strength and confidence of a person increase, but the same feature, when looping on negative points, can plunge into an abyss of hopelessness and develop. Usually, another vivid impression leads away from the repeated playing of the situation, but it is not rational to rely completely on the will of external factors, because. with a fairly long stay in despair, a person loses the ability to notice external changes in the situation, concentrating on internal suffering, or these changes become insignificant. Finding your own effective technique for switching attention and shifting the focus of thoughts will help reduce the severity of experience with negative emotions, as well as look at the world with a sober look when repeating positive ones.

In a situation of a negative event, it is important to feel your inner supports in order to maintain the state at the proper level. With, insecurity, the habit of practicing, a person only digs deeper into a pit of depressive disorder and a sense of impasse. Thus, not only does the world become imperfect and terrible due to the destruction of an important part or aspirations, but also the lack of faith in oneself quickly kills the remaining drops of hope for improvement. So it’s worth it to start normalizing and filling internal resources in advance, and not when the crisis has torn your life apart, it’s better to start when the life situation is still stable - for prevention and development of resilience.

It helps to strengthen meaningful connections, i.e. communication with those people who are able to really understand and accept you, where there is no need to keep a face. Speaking openly about your condition and problems with a sense of security is a rather therapeutic practice, as a result of which it decreases, it becomes possible to get feedback on your own emotions or events, from which, if a new way of existence is not born, then a support resource will appear that reduces despair. If there are no such people in the environment, then you can go to a psychologist for individual or group therapy. There is no possibility for therapy either - write a diary describing all your thoughts, feelings and events - periodically re-read what you have written, this will allow you to trace the dynamics, prompt a new vision, in extreme cases, it will simply help you throw out emotions.

But in the classroom it is worth looking for something new and exciting, avoid looking at an empty wall and scrolling through what happened. Remember what fascinated you in childhood and try to realize your inclinations now - it is in children's desires and memories that there is a lot of energy and potential, in addition, they are devoid of external imposition and expectations of the environment, so the chance that you will begin to do what your soul longed for confidently increases.

Take care of your own body, because depression changes the chemical processes in the brain, stops the nervous system, and, accordingly, the rest - focus on maintaining a healthy lifestyle, reduce the use of psychoactive substances, and increase the doses of B vitamins (they feed the nervous system), strictly follow your biorhythms, give your body physical activity, even if you don’t feel like moving (during sports, hormones of joy and pleasure are produced that help reduce depressive background).

How not to fall into despair from lack of money

Lack of money quickly plunges a person into a state of despair, even if he is not an avid materialist and understands that happiness cannot be bought. The laws of the modern world are such that it is the availability of money that guarantees survival and quality of life. This is not only the ability to afford an appropriate level of rest, but also the ability to really survive, as well as maintain the health of your body and mind (medicines are not laid out for free on the street, doctor's appointments and diagnostics cost money). In addition to this, adults usually have a few more expensive people, the provision of which is an important point (children and elderly parents who are not able to support themselves). Lack of money is not just unfulfilled hopes of receiving a certain amount, it is a very real death, not only of one's own, but also of loved ones, family, the dearest people. Despair is felt especially sharply when some crisis moment is added to the lack of money, which affects important spiritual areas, but could be resolved with the availability of finances.

You can talk a lot about how to survive such a paralyzing condition, but you should start acting immediately before it becomes chronic. Most people do not begin to realize their potential and use all these abilities until a critical situation occurs, although this is considered a crime against the universe, not only in religious concepts. If you spend the whole day receiving the minimum wage, while ideas of chic projects are constantly born in your head or you are a talented craftsman, but call it a hobby, then it is the critical situation of lack of money that can speak of changes. It's not that a low monetary reward indicates work not in the sphere of one's abilities or interests.

Lack of money is an excellent filter for truth. This applies to your friends, some of which will disappear along with money and your hobbies, because what brings real inner pleasure, you will not quit, but on the contrary, will look for ways to get the usual (cinema or horseback riding). By doing this, you can reformat your own life, leaving only the significant and necessary in it, both in terms of classes and connections. You have more time to manage to get out of an empty hole, but only taking into account the information received. It makes no sense to deal with lack of money in the old ways, remaining the same - re-evaluate the importance of the various goals and activities that take up your time, and change the structure.

The absence of the necessary comfortable amount of money makes you save and trains your character. Learning to save so as not to fall into despair is worth learning - this is a discipline when you write down income and expenses, this is a conscious purchase of goods and awareness of your own needs. Life begins to play with other colors, if you don’t just walk past a shop window with a red bag, pursing your lips and looking away, but allow yourself to go in, touch, try on and plunge into your own feelings. Most purchases do not satisfy urgent needs, but the desire to match some kind of image, so with the same bag you can understand that you don’t need a bag, but you want the attention of men and you tried to drown out this need. Acquaintance with oneself and knowledge through needs - the asceticism of lack of money can be cooler and more exciting than any psychotherapy and training, if approached with awareness.

Develop - not everything you need can be purchased with money. You can win something, exchange with someone, you can get what you need in exchange for a service, or take it from those who distribute unnecessary things. The number of discounts and promotions is incredible - learning to take advantage of opportunities and offer your services is an amazing skill that will come in handy in any area of ​​\u200b\u200blife.

So, if you perceive lack of money not as a tragedy, but as a challenge or a game, you can get a good job and get a lot of fun.

More and more people are trying to commit suicide every year, according to the World Health Organization. What is very important, there are no fewer such people in developed countries than in backward or only developing ones. So the economic factor does not play a key role here. It is worth noting that thoughts about death are most often visited by men, not women. Only a few countries are exceptions to this indicator. What is the reason for this phenomenon?

Reasons for suicide

According to statistics, in the last year alone, 1.1 million people on the planet have committed suicide. What makes them take such a desperate step? Apparently, they did not even think about the fact that many men and women are willing to pay a lot of money just to have children, that is, to give life to someone else. But alas, this is not possible. And here so many people take their own lives for free. They think so: he committed suicide and that's it - all problems are solved by this.

But in fact, by such an act they create more problems for their relatives, friends and acquaintances. Even seemingly strangers begin to think about what made their neighbor or colleague lose their lives. In fact, there can be many reasons for this:

• a lot of problems have accumulated and a person does not see another way out, how to end his life;
• learned from a doctor about a terrible diagnosis;
• the beloved wife left for another man;
• disappointment in life.

And these are just some of the reasons that push a person to commit suicide.

But, whatever the reasons why obsessive thoughts about death visit, they can all be divided into several categories:

• material problems;
• failures at work or in personal life;
• other problems.

If we consider all these reasons more closely, it turns out that they are completely solvable. You just need to make a little more effort, reconsidering your lifestyle or relationships with loved ones and with God for this.

Christian perspective on suicide

Who carefully reads the Holy Scriptures, he perfectly understands who sends obsessive thoughts about a person taking his own life. They do not come from human nature, and the proof of this is the fact that nowhere in the entire Bible is it said that suicide is a sin. In fact, it is such an unnatural sin that it seemed unbelievable to the authors who wrote the Bible. For this reason, they did not speak about him so directly.

Do not forget the fact that the whole Bible is based on two laws:

1. Love the Lord God with all your being.
2. Love your neighbor as yourself.

These two laws were given to people long before the coming of Jesus Christ into the world. But He also confirmed them and transferred them to the next generations. Should a person who loves himself think about suicide?

This is how such a chain is formed: we must love ourselves, our neighbors, and only this can serve as proof that we love God. But a suicide does not love himself and his neighbors, does not think about the consequences. This means that he cannot love God either. And this suggests that access to God is closed to him. And if a person finds peace with God, then he will understand how to solve problems and he will never have thoughts of suicide.

We must also remember that one of the 10 main commandments from the Lord consists of these two words: "Thou shalt not kill." And there, after all, it is not said whose death is in question - his own or someone else's. And this means one thing: God meant that a person should not encroach on life, since it is a gift from God. And it doesn't matter whose life it is, your own or another person's.