What to do to not be afraid. How to be nice

What do you call people who are not afraid of anything? Maybe daredevils? Or extremely self-confident? And do such individuals really exist? It is human nature to experience fear, there is nothing strange and reprehensible in this. When people around say the common phrase that there is nothing to be afraid of, they really do not understand what they are talking about. Our relatives and friends are often cunning, because they themselves do not always have only a rosy mood. It is impossible to completely protect oneself from negative impressions, even if they really interfere with a full existence, in some way destroy a person.

Otherwise, we would become robots who react to everything that happens with the same forced smile. But in such a gesture there will be no life, no joy, because the very position to feel only satisfaction is insincere! You can get rid of the all-consuming fear only through fruitful work on yourself. This will be discussed in this article.

The nature of fear

Why is a person afraid of something? Most often, this feeling arises when we are faced with something unknown. The psyche habitually reacts with fear, because it does not have a suitable behavior model in its arsenal. This emotion often causes them to aggravate the situation even more, to look for someone to blame. Fear is felt as a binding tension in the body, general mental discomfort and anxiety. Every human emotion has its own individual purpose. Fear has a protective function: it protects us from the invasion of a traumatic event or feeling.

Otherwise, the boundaries between comfort and life-threatening dangers would be blurred. There are no people who do not experience a sense of fear at all. We must think not about how not to be afraid of anything, but about learning how to independently minimize the destructive effect of an unpleasant emotion. Not to let fear take over your soul means to acquire the ability to remain free in any situation.

Overcoming fear

Anything can happen in life: the loss of a job, a quarrel with a loved one, an unexpected event that will turn any idea about the world upside down. All this cannot but injure our inner being. The emotional state begins to suffer in the first place: there are obsessive thoughts about a possible unfavorable development of events, trembling in the body, distrust of others. How to overcome fear? Quite simple, but effective methods will help.

Event analysis

Reflections on life contribute to the answer to the question: how not to be afraid of anything? It is necessary not only to think about what happened, but to analyze the situation in detail. Why did this happen to you? Have similar events happened before? What did you feel about it? With a little research, you will most likely find that the fears are far-fetched.

Your fear is the result of negative experiences in childhood and adolescence. Conversations with spiritually developed people, confidential conversations have a positive effect. Indeed, in most cases, a person simply needs the attention and support of others. Misunderstanding and loneliness only undermine strength, hinder personal growth.

meditation

Today, probably, no one is surprised by spiritual practices aimed at strengthening emotional balance. Through meditation, even the physical condition improves. In addition, consciousness opens up, an understanding comes of how to behave with people in order to live in harmony with everything that happens. Meditation helps to strengthen faith in yourself and your abilities. How not to be afraid of anything? Just start doing spiritual practice - and soon you will see a satisfactory result that will surely please you.

Meditation leads to the disclosure of all chakras, the inner nature of a person. Such an activity not only helps to cope with fear, but also neutralizes the destructive effect of all negative emotions. You will feel like a different person: cheerful, optimistic, worthy of all victories.

Intimate talk

following a dream

Setting achievable goals and enjoying their achievement is the best cure for any fear. How to learn not to be afraid of anything? Direct all efforts to the sphere of your dreams. This is the only way to overcome the all-consuming fear of not being up to par or unsuccessful. Personal victories incredibly motivate, lead forward, liberate, temper character. This is the main secret of successful people. “Fear nothing” - this phrase becomes their internal motto, thanks to which they achieve everything they want.

Why does following your dreams help you overcome fear? The fact is that any internal doubts limit our ability to think and reason sensibly. When we conquer them in ourselves, fear also rapidly recedes. The sphere of dreams always inspires a person to new achievements, teaches him to act quickly, and does not give him time to get hung up on existing problems.

Harmony with yourself

A person who is constantly afraid of something is highly susceptible to stress. A nervous emotional state can eventually lead to psychophysical disorders, significant malfunctions in the work of the whole organism. In order to get rid of constant worries, it is necessary to carefully work through the existing limiting beliefs. What does it mean? Allow yourself to find freedom, those very inner wings that will help you strive for great achievements. No matter how incredible your goals may seem right now, you can achieve them if you believe that they are really achievable. Dealing with fear is not easy, but we must continue to fight. One day you will realize that you have become so confident in yourself that you will overcome any obstacles.

Thus, overcoming any fear begins with systematic work with your character. Then you will feel that you can hold the whole universe in your palms.

What would you do - whether it's life or work - if you weren't afraid of anything? Such a simple question awakens countless fantasies, desires and regrets.

If the fear of failing or looking like a complete idiot has ever held you back from doing what your heart was calling for, you'll need some very important advice from business consultant Sandia Brügmann. You don't have to fight fear. Just accept it and don't let worries slow you down on the path to your dream.

We usually view fear as an unpleasant emotion that we do our best to avoid. Fear literally paralyzes, so instincts willy-nilly switch to survival mode. Alas, such behavior can lead to actions that have nothing to do with moving towards our goals.

Sandia Brügmann, business consultant

In other words, if you let them control you, you can forget about success.

This is especially dangerous for entrepreneurs. Running a business is quite a scary and exciting business in itself: it involves having to take on financial obligations, dealing with frustrated customers or employees, and realizing that the decisions you make affect not only your well-being, but also the lives of other people.

On the other hand, notes Brügmann, fear is an emotion inherent in man by nature. You won’t be able to get rid of him once and for all, and you don’t need to.

We are not faced with the task of curbing fear and preventing its occurrence in the future. Our goal is to understand what it is and learn how to act, relying on willpower and not hiding our heads in the sand.

Richard Branson phrased the same idea in a slightly different way.

Fear sometimes makes you wet yourself, but courage makes you act even in wet pants.

Richard Branson, Entrepreneur, Founder of the Virgin Group

The metaphor is not the most elegant, but the essence conveys absolutely correctly: do not give up on dreams because of fears, just accept them as part of life. Here are some tips to help you stop being afraid and start doing something.

1. Accept your fear

"What if I told you that your fear is a gift?" Brügmann asks. Pain and tension help us to fill life with genuine depth, because without all this it would be boring. Fear indicates the direction of growth and ultimately helps you understand who you really are. When we view fear from this perspective, it evokes curiosity or even gratitude.

2. Control your instincts

When faced with something frightening, people usually exhibit one of the following types of behavior: trying to fight, running without looking back, or falling into a stupor. If you have noticed this in yourself, know that you are guided by instincts. It is they who make us trust decision-making to fear. What will come of it? Absolutely nothing good.

3. Treat every situation as your choice.

Entrepreneurs know that things often turn out the way you never planned. As Eckhart Tolle said, “Whatever the present moment brings you, take it as your own choice.” For both you and your team, this is the most humane way to deal with what happened. By fully accepting the status quo, you rid yourself of various forms of emotional resistance, including fear.

4. Give everything you have to work

This is not about savings under the pillow, it means the ability to fully. It's how easily you engage with colleagues and activate your thinking skills to look at a problem from a non-standard perspective and find a creative way to solve it.

5. Handle objections and criticism positively

“If you're doing something really new, get ready to be rebuffed by traditional thinkers,” Brügmann says. By creating something that did not exist before, you challenge the status quo. Some people are frightened by innovations, while others are made ashamed that they themselves did not think of it before.

You can measure your success by the amount of criticism you receive.

Sandia Brugmann

6. Make fear and failure work for you.

If you, like most people, are afraid of failure, make fear your assistant. What is needed for this? Sandia Brügmann advises revisiting the definition itself. "Failure for me is not the exact opposite of success, failure is what will happen if I don't get out of my comfort zone."

Look at any business from this angle, and the fear of failure will force you to act.

7. Don't let superfluous thoughts take over.

You will never be able to control everything that happens, but you are free to choose how to react to it. When something bad happens, we tend to look for the cause of what happened in ourselves.

For example, you worked for a long time on the launch of a large-scale project or negotiated with an intractable client, but in the end everything went to pieces. Does this mean that the project or idea was so-so? No. It doesn't say anything about you as a person at all, so don't waste your time reflecting. Think better what will be the next step towards achieving the goal. And remember, your path to success is by no means tied to just one particular person or opportunity.

8. Learn to hear your fear

Try to recognize the signs of fear as early as possible and understand how it affects you. Yes, it's not that easy. Sandia Brügmann believes that explaining to ourselves who we really are is one of the most difficult tasks. The biggest lie, in the truth of which we ourselves believe and make others believe, is the idea of ​​ourselves as a whole and unchanging person.

In fact, we are made up of many subpersonalities. Our task is to thoroughly study each of them, finding positive features and those that should be corrected. Judgment has no place here. This is just a path to growth, change, the ability to curb fear and make informed choices based on your inner strength.

9. Rest in the heart of the storm

“Find a stable and balanced position within yourself and stay in it for as long as possible,” advises Sandja Brügmann. This is the point of your self-confidence, it is here that you can draw strength in order to follow the goal during periods of ups and downs in work and in your personal life.

If your well-being, peace and happiness depend solely on external factors, the level will be too high and in the end will become an obstacle to success.

Get rid of the event orientation. So you can go on the chosen course for as long as you like. You will gain the ability to make the right decisions and stop postponing them for later, justifying yourself with fear and the tension generated by it.

The feeling of fear often becomes decisive in the decision-making process, the choice of a person, his well-being, and the general condition of the body depend on it. All people have their own fears: someone is afraid of losing their job or money, someone is worried about the lives of their loved ones, someone is worried about the possibility of losing their luck, a good chance. Many are afraid of speaking in front of an audience, making decisions, it is difficult to take responsibility for themselves, to radically change their lives, circle of interests and acquaintances. As a result, a person loses peace, does not follow a promising path, is content with little and tries to reduce the number of factors that cause fear in him. It is obvious: in order to start living a full life, to fulfill oneself, to get rid of a fettering feeling, it is necessary to stop being afraid, to remove a serious obstacle. A few nuances, useful tips and an algorithm will help you gradually get rid of the feeling of fear.

Get rid of the feeling of fear. Nuances, features, recommendations
Overcoming the feeling of fear, it is very important to thoroughly study it, understand yourself, find the sources, causes of anxiety and determine methods that will help eliminate them. Fear does not just need to be suppressed, drowned out with drugs, alcohol: the most important thing is to get rid of the root cause of fears.

1. First, understand the sources of your fears. If something regularly causes you excitement, anxiety is also a sign of fear. For example, you are afraid to answer at the blackboard, write tests, cross busy intersections, worry about your loved ones and do not like to be in dark rooms. Each of these fears is justified in one way or another. Of course, you should not just ignore the factors that cause fear. Get to the bottom of them. This is what will help change the situation for the better in the future.
   
2. To stop being afraid, to study all your fears more carefully, start writing a “subliminal letter”. Take a pen and paper, focus and completely abstract from everything around you. Relax and think only of your fears. Do not be shy about your thoughts, feelings: transfer to the sheets everything that you are afraid of. Reflect everything in words, signs, drawings, but always point by point. Write briefly, but then supplement the list with details, details, for this, leave small gaps between the lines. Rate all fears on a ten-point scale, with "10" being the worst thing you can imagine. You will find that most fears will be on this "ladder" well below the main fear.
   
3. After writing down all the fears, start training. There are two particularly effective types of activities that are suitable for absolutely everyone, for any kind of fear. The first training should be used by beginners. Take your list of fears and focus. Choose the most unpleasant or, conversely, the least disturbing item for you. It all depends on your perception. Think about this fear, the facts and events that cause it, imagine everything in detail, in detail and in pictures. At first it is quite unpleasant, but then you will feel that you are starting to get used to your "script", the "film" of fear. Over time, these facts will no longer be so terrifying. If you find it easier to start with the least fears, then do so. Remember that you need to tune in to the training gradually, imaginary pictures should not provoke mental trauma in you. In cases where fear arises as a result of serious incidents, life tragedies, it is worth contacting a specialist and not trying to overcome everything on your own, otherwise the effect may be the opposite.
   
4. Another training that relieves fear is different in a game form. Go back to your notepad and start with the least fear on a scale of 1 to 10. Try to translate fear into something funny, funny. Draw it in the form of a caricature, a funny picture. Look for "weaknesses" of frightening facts, events and use them in creative training. Such classes are very effective, the main thing is the right attitude and your imagination.
   
5. Having sorted out the fears, having answered for yourself the question “what am I afraid of?”, you need to ask yourself the following questions: why are you afraid of this and what can be done to get rid of fear. Of course, you will be able to eliminate many factors that cause fear and anxiety: some are easy, and you will have to work hard to deal with some. But, as practice shows, most of the fears can be overcome.
   
6. How to stop being afraid if the factor that causes panic is insurmountable and irremovable? Allow yourself to be afraid. Release your emotions, relax. Remember that they need to be controlled: you can be afraid, but not lose power over yourself, control yourself. Think purposefully about your fear sometimes and get used to it. Gradually, its influence on you will begin to decrease.
   
7. A very important point: never drown out fears, do not “kill” fear with medicines, alcohol. The following things are best distracted from fears:
   • healthy entertainment: watch your favorite comedies, read books, go to the rink or to the concert of your favorite artist;
     
   • engage in creativity (embroidery, knitting, drawing, modeling, beading, etc.); it is likely that you will find an excellent circle, meet interesting people there, accumulate many new positive impressions;
     
   • any employment, work (for example, a useful thing - helping as a volunteer - will surely distract you from bad thoughts).
     
8. Strengthen the body as a whole, since any weakness, illness, lack of physical activity also negatively affects the nervous system, emotional state.
   • choose a sports section that is interesting and feasible for you, start attending it;
     
   • watch your menu: avoid too spicy and greasy food, exclude alcohol, try to stop smoking;
     
   • get enough sleep every day, do not interrupt sleep and do not stay up late;
     
   • walk in the fresh air more often, try at least 5-10 minutes a day to devote to exercises, stretch your muscles.
     
9. Please note: your fears can be an excellent incentive to change something for the better, engage in self-development, direct efforts towards personal growth. For example, if you are afraid of public speaking, set a goal for yourself: to become a real speaker, to speak freely and freely, not to be shy, to speak beautifully, interestingly, to captivate the audience. Special classes, courses will certainly come in handy for you, and in the end you can find your vocation, unexpectedly discover talents unknown to you before. So, for example, often people who were afraid of losing their jobs were so enthusiastic about improving their professionalism and self-realization that very soon they themselves left their usual place of service for a more promising and paid position. Consider: how can your fear help you? What can you do to stop being afraid? You will most likely see hidden opportunities in yourself, realize them.
   

How to stop being afraid. Algorithm
Remember the tips and act according to the algorithm to get rid of the fears that weigh on you.

Remember your fears, don't try to drown them out. Eliminate the causes of fear, monitor your emotions and do not forget about your body, improve your health. Then all fears will gradually recede, and you will be able to make your life better.

By avoiding decisive action and delaying events, we only increase fear. Unfortunately, it is human nature to find all possible excuses and excuses in order to put off the situation of an unpleasant choice for us.

The problem is that everything has a price. Every time we avoid something, it increases our excitement, and the event or the conversation that we are trying to put off only becomes more frightening in our imagination. This is how, by the way, many phobias are formed.

In the end, we come to the conclusion that much of what we once put off until better times - we didn’t learn the language, we didn’t do what our partner asked us to do many times - begins to directly affect our career or relationships.

In addition, without acting decisively and boldly (at least in small things), we eventually lose emotional stability, the ability to quickly recover from stress. Because such stability is acquired from constant overcoming, albeit small, but challenges.

What we lack is not even emotional stability. This is the moment, the impulse, when we, without hesitation or hesitation, rush forward, as if into cold water, to do what we consider right and necessary, instead of stomping on the shore.

How to become brave and stop being afraid?

Minimize your chances of fear and maximize your chances of action.

1. Don't think too long

It is especially difficult to decide when you are afraid of being rejected.

But I must tell you that our courage and determination have one strange quality - they melt over time. And the longer you wait, the less you have left. So if you decide to come up and talk to someone or, conversely, dot the i's and leave, don't wait - do it.

2. Focus on crossing the threshold

If you have an unpleasant conversation with one of the family members, determine for yourself what you want to say and what result to come. And then forget about it for a while and concentrate only on saying the first phrase. It happens that for weeks some cannot muster the courage to say: "We need to talk." Don't worry about how your conversation will go. To enter into a situation is to half win the battle.

How to stop being afraid on the eve of a speech or interview? If you don't often speak in front of large audiences or don't talk at all, start small. Ask for directions several times in a row. Act despite the fear, it will pass very soon. The number of repetitions is important here.

Get used to the sound of your voice and being listened to and responded to, and then work on confidence and audience control. Read a large excerpt of your favorite humorous work in front of one of your friends or family. You will notice that you will soon want to add expressiveness. Read like an actor, pause, look at the reaction of the audience. You will come to the interview already as a person who owns the audience.

4. Think about how good it will be for you later

When we hesitate to even approach something, it is exhausting. Remember the feeling after the exams, when the whole summer is ahead. When you finally do away with what has been scaring you for so long, you will experience the same freedom.

5. Imagine how many new doors will open for you

This is especially true for those moments when it is difficult for you to say goodbye to something old, from which you have long grown. How to stop being afraid to end a relationship that does not suit you, but continues by inertia? How do you get the courage to change your life if it's surrounded by old uncomfortable furniture, in a place you don't like? Change will take you a lot of time and resources, but the result will bring relief.

6. Give yourself a precise time

Sign up for a gym or doctor beforehand. Even if it is a conversation with someone close who is always there, a specific date will make the event inevitable.

7. Do it with someone

A proven way to stop being afraid is to take the first step with someone together. To become bolder, we need the support of those who know us well and who believe in us. Feel free to ask your friends to come with you to the interview and wait for you in the hallway.

Some fully grown people for years do not dare to go to the gym and start working out just for this reason. There are those who find it difficult to come to a psychologist and finally sort out their problems - start with trainings, where there will be many of you and everyone will be in an equal position. You will receive not only the support of a psychologist, but also the help of group members.

Someone is endowed with greater courage from birth, someone is more timid. But this does not mean that you will remain the same tomorrow. Start working on internal stability, train your communication skills. All this is quite real.

According to the material psychologies.ru

Internal fears sometimes do not allow a person to develop and move on. But without courage, you will never achieve success and your goals. How to stop being afraid and start moving towards your dream?

Often a person is afraid of something. This may be the fear of the dark, airplanes, girls, the public, illness, work and life in general. Fear signals us about danger, but what if it prevents us from acting and paralyzes our whole life?

How to stop being afraid

Comfort zone

From childhood, a person was taught that life is dangerous. Parents took care of him for a long time, and he almost never faced the difficulties of real life. When a person grows up, he begins to fear and be afraid of everything. Man tries to protect himself from everything. He fearfully sits in his comfort zone and is not going to leave it.

What to do and how to stop being afraid? The most interesting and promising is outside the comfort zone. There are interesting acquaintances, travel, work, success, the opposite sex and a new life. It is impossible to achieve something different by doing the old things. It's time to make an attempt to see what is beyond the horizon and study it.

Fear of mistakes

People think that making a mistake is shameful and their self-respect will suffer. Failure is not defeat, as some people think. Mistake is normal. Only those who do nothing do not commit them.

How to stop being afraid? Stop protecting yourself and your self-esteem. A person is not a crystal vase, and one cannot run away from abrasions and bumps. It's like riding a bike. At first, you will fall many times until you learn to ride.

How success works

Sometimes people have no idea how life and success work. People who succeed immediately on one try are rare. Many successful people have failed several times. Big failures did not stop them, but taught them how to deal with problems and look for solutions.

How to stop being afraid? Luck loves the brave and stubborn, not the cowardly and giving up after a couple of attempts. Go ahead, don't expect a miracle. Create opportunities and seize them. Try again and again. Time runs very fast, and you will not have a second life.