To do to a woman after 50 years. Here are examples of such exercises

Psychologists say that many problems in a woman's life arise because she is too critical of herself, does not love herself. We often hear, “Love yourself. And everything in life will get better! But it's easier to say these words than to put them into practice. However, with a strong desire, you can raise your own self-esteem and love yourself in a short time.

First of all, it is necessary to define what it is - self-love. Many confuse it with narcissism and narcissism, when a person considers himself the "center of the universe" and thinks that everyone else is obviously worse than him. Loving yourself does not mean being selfish. These two feelings have nothing to do with each other.

True self-love is acceptance of your identity. You accept yourself, your character, your body and love, despite all the shortcomings. This is a modest and natural feeling that allows you to live without stress and feel like a happy person.

There are several signs of high self-esteem:

Self-confidence in any situation
Respect for your deeds and actions
Feeling of lightness and happiness
You live in harmony with yourself

If you only want to achieve all this, you need to learn how to love yourself.

Steps towards love

A sense of love and self-respect can be cultivated in oneself. To increase your self-esteem, you need to perform specific actions and control your feelings and emotions. Here are a few simple steps to start building your own self-esteem.

Kindness to yourself.

Be kind to yourself and don't beat yourself up over the little things. Stop thinking about your shortcomings. All these thoughts should simply be thrown out of your head and not allowed to appear. From the day you decide to love yourself, all you need to say to yourself is compliments and nice words. In no case should you scold yourself for your appearance, since it does not always depend on us.

Many women reproach themselves for past mistakes. But it should be understood that admitting a mistake is already a big plus. What's the point of scolding yourself that a long time ago you did this and not otherwise? It is better to be kind and forgive yourself, not dwell on past mistakes and recognize them as invaluable life experiences.

Stop negative words and thoughts!

Our subconscious takes seriously all the words and thoughts that we send it. Stop thinking that you are ugly or fat, otherwise you will be like that. All negative thoughts and words should be immediately blocked. It often happens that we talk badly about ourselves in front of other people, subconsciously expecting compliments from them. Under no circumstances should this be done. It is better, looking at yourself in the mirror, to think about the good and compliment yourself.

Analysis of relationships with people

In life, we are surrounded by many different people. The advice of a psychologist says: you need to communicate only with those who do not cause negative emotions in you and do not bring negativity into your life. It is difficult to do this, but it is quite possible to achieve your goal. Instead of communicating with people you don’t like, it’s better to be in the company of yourself - it will be much more valuable and productive. Don't be afraid to change your social circle. After all, there are probably people in your environment, next to whom the soul rejoices and flourishes, and the mood rises.

The ability to say "no"

If you don’t have a heart for something, then you shouldn’t do it. Naturally, this does not include your daily duties: work, study, housework, activities with children - there is no escape from this. And there are things that you do without urgent need and without desire.

Actions during which you have to sacrifice your principles and desires lead to a decrease in your self-esteem. Your authority in your own eyes and self-respect are falling, you stop loving yourself. Most often, we do such actions when we do not want to offend or disappoint someone. For example, we go to a party, just so as not to upset the one who invited you, we buy an unnecessary thing, so that the seller is not offended.

You need to learn to say "no" to those people and things that you don't like. The main thing is not to feel guilty about it. You should do only what you want, showing love and respect for your own desires. Do not be afraid that someone will be offended by you. Learn to tactfully refuse and respect personal boundaries.

Love for your appearance

Look at yourself in the mirror and try to understand: do you love your face, your body? Do you accept yourself for who you are? You need to love your age, your weight, your figure, habits, character. It is difficult to find a woman who considers her figure and appearance ideal. Almost everyone sees flaws in themselves, sees their body as imperfect and wants to correct it.

For women, love for your body is especially important. Since childhood, most people have been given the idea that our figure is something imperfect that needs to be corrected. No one canceled work on oneself, but one should not reach fanaticism in this and strive for perfection with all one's strength. This is an ongoing process. Extra pounds will go away - wrinkles will appear, cellulite will be replaced by gray hair and so on.

But in fact, our body is a gift that needs to be loved and cherished. Having fallen in love with your reflection in the mirror, you will very soon be convinced that the problem of excess weight is gone or no longer bothers you, and wrinkles and gray hair do not make you older than you are. Over the years, the body undergoes natural changes that cannot be stopped. Youth, maturity and decay are inevitable stages in the development of any living organism. If you constantly worry about it and look for every new wrinkle, then self-esteem will plummet.

Instead, you need to choose to enjoy your appearance, your face, body, hair. Your body really wants love, so take care of it, and it will be grateful to you.

Council the first. Getting to know your own body. To do this, you need to completely undress, stand in front of a mirror and carefully examine yourself. This time, you do not need to look for flaws and imperfections in yourself, you must make sure that your body is beautiful. To enhance your emotions, run your hand over your skin, feel its softness and velvety, consider the smooth curves, dimples and bulges.
Find the part of your body that you like the most and admire it, touch it. For example, you have a large chest, or a thin waist, or even beautiful collarbones - it can be anything. Turn around in front of a mirror to take a closer look at your beauty from all angles.
This exercise should be done twice a week. Gradually, you will not only get used to your body, but also love it the way it is.

Tip two. Personal care. Often we hear the expression “well-groomed woman”, if you want to be like that, then you must definitely take care of yourself. Just imagine a room in which no one has put things in order for a long time: it will look neglected and untidy. So what do you want from your body if you don't take care of it? Many women will object and say that they cleanse and moisturize their skin daily, and sometimes even pamper themselves with masks.

But not only the process is important, but also how it is executed. Self-care should not be combined with household chores or other concerns. You need to completely relax and enjoy the procedure, whether it's a bubble bath or a cleansing facial mask. That is, all care procedures should not be mechanical, but conscious. A procedure done in passing will not bring much benefit, you need to immerse yourself in the process, as they say, with your head.
Self-care also includes stretching, physical activity. But you need to do this only if the process really gives you pleasure. When you do something for your body, it is important to be in contact with it and in harmony, not to be distracted by extraneous stimuli.

Tip three. Pleasures for the body. You need to not only love and care for your body, but also pamper it. It is through the body that we know the world, feel and feel it. Any pleasurable bodily experience will do as a pleasure for your body. Everything here is purely individual. Some people like silk sheets, others enjoy the aroma of their favorite perfume, the delicate fabric of underwear, a massage from a professional massage therapist, the touch of fur, or even the hands of a loved one.

Even the simplest things can bring a lot of pleasure. Stretch your whole body in the morning - it's so nice!
And then brew yourself delicious coffee, feeling its delicious aroma. On the street, do not withdraw into yourself, but expose your face to a light breeze and gentle sun, inhale the aromas of fresh greenery or a frosty morning. Feel your body, its movements, learn to enjoy the very opportunity to move freely and easily.

Council the fourth. Attention to the body. When you learn to love and pamper your body, start listening to it. The body gives us signals that must be noticed. The most common is pain, usually severe enough for us to accurately notice it. And we often do not pay attention to minor ailments, deterioration in well-being. But in vain! Eliminating it is much easier than fixing more serious consequences later. Pay attention to what you eat and how you do it. Most often, we eat on a schedule at the same time, or vice versa, without any mode, when a free minute appears. Eat when you really want to. And preference should be given to those dishes that you like. The rules of a healthy diet are good, but sometimes it is worth listening to the needs of your body. If you adhere to the principles of a healthy diet, but you are unbearably craving a cake, nothing bad will happen from one piece. Our body signals us about what nutrients it lacks.
Next, pay attention to sleep. Usually we spare time to sleep, leaving it for later, for the weekend, in general, following the residual principle. There is always something more important and necessary or more interesting that distracts us from this vital process. A sleepy person loses his vitality much faster, his reaction slows down, attention drops. Chronic sleep deprivation can even lead to illness.

Tip five. Presenting yourself correctly. Even the most beautiful person will not look like that if he is dressed in inappropriate clothes. the ability to dress, look stylish and attractive is one of the tricks that will help you fall in love with your own body. It is not necessary to dress expensively, but clothes should suit you and emphasize the dignity of your figure.

Psychologists give another good piece of advice on how to love your own body: stop comparing yourself to other people. You can only compare yourself in the present with yourself in the past. At the same time, only positive points should be noted.

Self respect

Until you have self-respect, you will not be able to live in harmony with yourself. It is respect that is the basis of self-love, without which it is impossible to enjoy life to the fullest.

It's impossible to love someone you don't respect.

Respect is about standing up for yourself, showing your personality, and showing others that you are truly worthy of respect. At the same time, defending one's own opinion should not be accompanied by scandal or noise. It is important to do this calmly and with dignity, then you will be treated accordingly.

Most of us are used to either silently swallowing insults and insults, or responding to them by sliding down to the level of the offender. Often after this, we are tormented by the fact that we could not find the right words and get out of the situation with dignity. But you definitely need to learn how to do this, forgetting the settings given to us in childhood. Children are rarely taught to love themselves, teachers do not always treat children with respect, just like other adults. As we grow, we get used to the fact that fighting back is unacceptable. These attitudes carry over with us into adulthood.

It is very difficult to learn not to experience these emotions and deal with them. But if you wish, you can refuse them once and for all. You need to go through this in order to learn to truly love and respect yourself. In general, there are two ways out of the conflict situation:

Forgive the person and let go
Reply to the offender without losing dignity, without sinking to his level

Both options are suitable for cultivating self-esteem and self-love. Each person experiences the aggressive influence of others. Anger can be directed specifically at you or just in society, but it is not necessary to experience negative emotions at all.

Distract and do not react to the irritant, especially if the meeting with such a person is short-term - for example, in line or on the bus.

If you don't like something, be sure to talk about it. Don't hide dissatisfaction in yourself. A calm and friendly tone will help solve any problem. Negative emotions should appear in your life as little as possible.

Methods for raising self-esteem

Before raising your self-esteem, you need to determine at what level it is. On a blank sheet of paper, draw a vertical line and put a dot on it. In this case, the dot symbolizes you and your attitude towards yourself. The lower the point on the graph, the lower your level of self-love. The best option is the middle, it means an adequate perception of oneself. If the point is much above average, then your self-love borders on adoration.

If self-love is clearly not enough for you, try training to cultivate it.

First exercise- quite simple and common. Take a sheet of paper and vertically divide it into two parts. On the left, write everything, even, in your opinion, your most insignificant virtues. On the right side of the sheet - your negative qualities that you would like to change in yourself. Look at the list on the right side and carefully cross out, paint over each word in it. Then tear off this half of the sheet and destroy it in any way - burn it, tear it into small pieces, cut it with scissors, flush it down the toilet, blow it in the wind. Save the remaining half and memorize these words. Every morning, in front of the mirror, repeat a list of your positive traits, starting with the words: “I am ...”. Every 3-4 days the list should be updated with a new quality. If it happens more often, even better.

Second exercise performed in the evenings. Sit down and focus, remember everything that happened during the day and praise yourself. Let for some little things or minor actions, but be sure to praise. Don't compare yourself to others, but compare yourself to who you were yesterday. Follow the dynamics, you can make notes in a notebook.

Step by step exercise which is useful for every woman. First you need to imagine your image - this is what you would like to become. It should be not only appearance, but also character, thoughts, behavior. Imagine a specific picture in which there will be a lot of details. The image should not differ too much from the original. Analyze the resulting image and remove all negativity from it. That is, you should position all your negative qualities as positive ones. For example, slowness is not a flaw, but just your feature. Perhaps you just take a more balanced approach to the performance of your tasks and responsibilities. In the same vein, consider each of your qualities. After that, your image will be more solid and complete.

Compare the resulting image with what you are now. If the self-image has a positive content, then this has a great effect on self-esteem.

External factors are not important for true self-love. It doesn't matter what car you have, T-shirt, hairstyle - it's all external, temporary. It doesn't even matter if you have a family, children, a loved one. self-sufficiency is one of the signs of true self-love.
Mistakes and shortcomings are your experience, your exceptional traits. Your mistakes have brought you to the point in life where you are now. And flaws are a reflection of your personality. However, it is important to understand here that the fight against negative qualities is still underway: you strive to become better and better every day.
Love doesn't need a reason. This also applies to self-love. If the phrase “I love myself because ...” appears in my head, then this is obviously a false path.
You need to love and respect not only your body, but also your mind. Try not to watch TV, read useful literature, develop your mind and not clog it with unnecessary information.
Stop judging others, then you will be more condescending about your own life. Judgment is a negative that should be avoided in your life. In a conversation, you can be surprised and start a new, interesting topic for you.
Reward and pamper yourself. For example, when you reach a certain goal, give yourself a gift. Let it be a day off, a visit to the spa, or just buying a cake.
Stop crying and complaining, avoid this when communicating with other people. Nobody wants to love whiners, they love strong personalities who can solve their problems. If there is a person in your environment who constantly cries into your vest, just remove him from your circle.
Trust yourself. Your desires, your intuition and intentions - all this must be put into practice, unless, of course, it has good intentions. You should not live someone else's life and behave "like everyone else", so as not to stand out from the environment.
Find a goal and strive to reach it. It should be a really big and exciting task that will be challenging, interesting and important. This will help you become an interesting person, and first of all interesting for yourself.

By rethinking your life, you can raise your self-esteem, love yourself and really enjoy every moment. Happy people attract positivity - love yourself and test it for yourself.

A healthy lifestyle is really important.

Most of us still put ourselves under constant stress. Statistics say that 95% of diseases are related to stress.

Loads, nutrition, the absence of bad habits - all this is the basis of a healthy lifestyle. When you stick to the basic guidelines, you will be amazed at how much more productive, positive and healthy your life will become. You will feel many times better.

Surround yourself with friends and loved ones who support and love you

How many times in your life have you been forced to listen to a flood of unnecessary negative revelations from a friend or colleague? Judgment, gossip, energy vampirism - all this negatively affects your life.

Get rid of toxic relationships. Anyone who does not like and condemn you should be at a decent distance, but it is better to stop communicating with him altogether.

Your 5 closest friends are a mirror of what you really think about yourself. Make sure your friends share your values.

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Learn to say "no"

It's hard, I know. Many women take on additional tasks at work, help with their children's school projects, take charge of their relationship with their spouse, and solve their friends' problems.

It will take practice not to automatically say yes.

But after the first few times, you will learn to say “no” confidently and boldly.

You will be surprised how much it will free up your schedule. You will receive vital energy for those things that you really want to do.

Remove “I have to” from your vocabulary

As soon as you want to say a sentence that begins with this phrase, stop and ask yourself the question “why”.

People who constantly talk about their plans and desires rarely feel satisfied and calm.

Replace “I have to” with “I would like”, “I choose”. I'm sure the result will surprise you!

Neutralize negativity

Try instead of constant negative thoughts to think about the good.

Women spend so much energy on self-humiliation:

Am I smart enough? How terrible this dress fits me! It's time to lose weight!

As soon as you hear the inner critic, say to him:

Everything is fine with me. I am the artist of my life!

It may sound dubious, but I can say with confidence that this simple phrase can really help - hundreds of girls have reported amazing results from such a setup. It was as if a heavy weight had been lifted from their shoulders.

Photo source: pexels.com

Love and accept yourself

You may not believe it yet, but you are beautiful. Truth! Start every morning with the phrase:

I love me. Good morning !

It sounds trite, but the more you do this, the more you begin to appreciate yourself. You will be surprised at the results of this simple exercise in just a couple of weeks.

Practice Gratitude

It literally takes 5 minutes every day. Sit down in the morning with your laptop and quickly jot down a list of what you are grateful for in this world. Everything that comes to mind.

To get the most out of the exercise, allow yourself to really experience gratitude.

For example, if you drank a cup of fragrant fresh coffee, then feel grateful to the person who brewed it.

Engage in self-awareness

Get to know yourself: what is your mood, what are the motives for your actions, what secret desires do you have?

If you want to live a fulfilling and fruitful life, you need to constantly ask yourself questions.

Check what emotions you are experiencing. If this is a negative, then find out why it occurs and how to fix it.

Also, don't forget to make time for fun, joy, and creativity. This positive experience will reflect on your life the best way.

Take responsibility for your life

Do not blame external circumstances and other people. This only breeds more anger and frustration.

When things don't go so smoothly, say to yourself:

I am responsible for my own life. I choose what and how to do.

Believe in your own ability

When you believe that you have the strength and ability to create the life you dream of, you will be surprised at the rapid change.

You will realize that you have unlimited power that will inspire you to change.

There is almost always a way out and you will see it.

Photo source: pexels.com

Stop worrying about what other people think of you

Girls are taught from childhood that they need opinion and approval from the outside. If you need it too, now is the time to change it.

Wasting energy on someone else's opinion is very stupid. Such an activity not only drains your energy, but also hides the best part of yourself.

When you catch yourself in your own insecurities, then remember that the most important thing is yourself, and not the opinions of others.

Learn to listen better to others

You will always learn something new if you listen more than you talk. It could be a conversation with an old friend, a stranger, a family member, or a business partner.

Learn the art of listening and asking thoughtful questions. By becoming a great listener, you will be able to form closer and deeper connections with the people around you. You are waiting for interesting conversations, and the brain will be in good shape.

Don't forget to be surprised and be a beginner

We live in a culture that prioritizes competence and performance. Do you want to live a rich, creative and fun life? Then do something new. Even where you have experience, you can always learn something new.

Let go of your perfectionism to become an expert at something new. This will open up many possibilities for you.

Practice Forgiveness

Many of us live with deep resentment and pain inside. Even if we have already been apologized a hundred times .

Don't criticize others, don't make angry comments about them. Even mentally. How you feel about others is a reflection of yourself.

Say “let go” to yourself and you will be surprised how quickly your feelings of anger dissipate. When all internal grievances go away, you will experience a surge of positive energy. Relief and compassion will come into your life.

Develop your creativity

Our culture suggests that only a very small percentage of women can be creative. Not true! You were born with creativity in your blood: it's your birthright.

Find ways to unleash your creativity. For example, you can take up gardening and knitting.

Photo source: pixabay.com

Spend time in nature

Nature is one of the best ways to relieve stress and clear the mind of clutter. Walks in the woods or near the lake will push you to be creative.

You will experience a sense of well-being and tranquility. Even if you only have 20 minutes a day to walk, you will still feel the magic of nature.

Your life will change for the better.

Create the life of your dreams

Even if you are not confident and your experience is not so successful .

The truth is: believe in yourself and act! You will find a way to create an extraordinary life.

Don't let anyone tell you otherwise.

Don't take yourself too seriously

Life is a paradox. On the one hand, leading a meaningful life is serious business; on the other hand, not very .

Have fun, laugh, be playful. This will help you develop easy relationships with other people.

After you have a good laugh, then your day will be successful.

12 357 0 Hello! In this article, we will talk about how to love yourself. The advice of our psychologists will help you accept yourself for who you are and increase your self-esteem.

We can try to please others, look good in the eyes of others, do good deeds, do charity work, remain calm, and overcome difficult situations well. And a lot of other useful things in life… But we can become truly happy and successful only when we start to like ourselves and be satisfied with ourselves. Self-doubt, low self-esteem, anxiety, suspiciousness, susceptibility to depression are the consequences of self-dislike, which clearly interfere with living a full life. If you are asking the main question of today's topic, then you are already taking the first step in this direction, and the recommendations below will help you.

It turns out that learning to live in harmony with yourself is not such a rare problem. Unfortunately, it is complicated by the fact that self-dislike may not be realized, sometimes this requires effort. In most cases, the roots of this phenomenon go back to early childhood and have influenced our worldview and behavior ever since. There are, of course, other reasons as well.

Reasons for not loving yourself

Education based on orders and the suppression of initiative.

If a child is regularly exposed to excessive criticism, reproaches, and at the same time he receives little affection and warmth from his parents, then an image of himself as unworthy of love, attention and success is formed in his mind.

The other extreme of upbringing - overprotection - also does not have the best effect on instilling self-love. When a child is overprotected and not allowed to act independently, then, growing up, he realizes that he does not have enough skills, skills, courage. And this inevitably leads to self-doubt, a decrease in self-esteem.

Doing things that have caused criticism from others, or for which you yourself condemn yourself.

It happens that we do something contrary to our ideals and beliefs, “out of stupidity”, without thinking. Or a reassessment of values may occur, and we begin to repent of our deeds. Not everyone can easily cope with this oppressive state. Some even stop loving themselves.

Inconsistency with the ideal self-image.

If we strive for the ideal we have created, but do not achieve it (in appearance, personal qualities, behavior), then we experience dissatisfaction with ourselves. The reason may also be a discrepancy with the expectations of others or the image imposed by the media. As a result, we do not accept ourselves as we are, and all the time we set ourselves an unattainable bar.

Facing failure.

bad events in personal life and professional field can affect our perception of ourselves. Parting with a loved one, feelings of guilt, relationships with friends and colleagues, lack of career success often affect self-esteem. Especially if we are used to treating ourselves through the prism of achievement.

Self-love: its features and origin

It is worth understanding the essence of the concept and how self-love is formed.

Self-love is, first of all, understanding and acceptance of oneself. I:

We know what we want in life, we know how to dream and make plans.
We have goals to which we are true and from which we try not to deviate.
We are aware of our strengths and weaknesses, we accept ourselves as we are.
If we understand that certain qualities interfere in life, then we work on ourselves and try to change them (without fanaticism, of course).

But even changing something undesirable in our personality, we still continue to respect ourselves and praise ourselves for the slightest shifts in a positive direction. After all, we have a core, a foundation, a lot of strong qualities for which it is worth loving ourselves!

Love is born in actions and in actions it is manifested..

Self-love comes from the actions of parents. They take care of the baby, communicate with him, smile, play, give their warmth and love, guide him and set life guidelines in order to form a mature personality in him. The child perceives these signals, feels love and support from his parents, he develops self-confidence and a position: “I can”, “I can handle it”, “I am worthy”, etc. Without being afraid to act, we learn to more effectively accept make decisions, take responsibility, follow a goal. And this is always an additional reason to respect yourself.

When we love ourselves, we act.

We don’t waste time worrying about “what is wrong with me?” or "I can't get it." Of course, this does not mean that people who love and respect themselves do not have moments of blues and anxiety. We are all alive and have the right to experience different emotions. But there are 3 key differences.

First, when we love ourselves, we always remember our main goals and will follow them, despite life's difficulties.
Secondly, we will not let these melancholy moments drag on and we will find a way to get ourselves “in shape”.
Thirdly, our habit of acting will not be long in coming, and we will begin to look for a way out of this situation. And we will definitely find it!

The difference between self-love and selfishness, narcissism, narcissism

Self-love is inner satisfaction with oneself, self-respect, understanding and acceptance of oneself. The one who loves himself treats other people with respect, does not consider them higher or lower than himself, communicates on an equal footing.

Self love is not selfishness. The main difference is that a person who loves himself (not an egoist) is able to take care of himself and others equally, and an egoist puts his own interests above others, considers his own person to be extremely important. He often does not take into account the needs of people.

Narcissism and narcissism are usually used interchangeably and mean extreme selfishness. These qualities are possessed by people with high self-esteem, who believe that only they deserve true attention and attract it to themselves by any means. All the rest narcissists consider below themselves. They are not sensitive to the problems of other people and are not responsive.

People who love themselves (and show interest in others) are drawn to. And self-humiliation, selfishness and narcissism in most cases repel.

Why is it important to love yourself?

Self-dislike leads to the accumulation of various negative feelings, the most destructive of which are and. We envy those who are better than us (as we think), who have achieved something more than us, and this is very depressing. We are jealous of someone close to those they like (more than we, as it seems again). We suffer because we are not as good as we would like. And unfortunately, these negative experiences most often remain at the level of emotions and thoughts and do not turn into actions to change the situation.
A person who does not love himself (and, therefore, does not understand and does not accept), is turned to his inner world, he always wants to understand, study, discover something in himself. He is in constant search of himself. Therefore, he has no time for others. Such people are closed from the outside world and from communication with others. And when we love and understand ourselves, we are more open to contacts with the world, other people are interesting to us, we study them.
Love for ourselves and others makes us kinder. When we like ourselves, we are generally more satisfied with life and experience positive emotions. We feel the strength and desire to help others.
To be liked by others, you need to accept and love yourself. If we do not learn how to do this, we will not be able to attract the attention of other people, successfully communicate and make new acquaintances.

When we don't love ourselves, we don't allow others to love us.

Our self-confidence and self-confidence directly depend on self-love. Self-esteem contributes to an adequate assessment of oneself and one's own capabilities.
When we love ourselves, we take better care of ourselves: we take care of our appearance, allocate enough time for rest and hobbies, we try to protect ourselves from stress, emotional and physical overload. Of course, such an attitude towards oneself helps to maintain health.
Self-love makes us bolder. This makes it easier for us to stand up for ourselves and others, to declare our interests, not to allow anyone to "sit on our necks", to take risks for the sake of a worthwhile cause (after all, we are confident in ourselves!)
Self love makes us stronger. We better cope with difficult situations and overcome stress, gain experience and become wiser.
In the family, we are also more successful if we like ourselves. For example, if a woman is satisfied with herself and appreciates herself, then she looks good, shines, creates comfort and mood for her loved ones, takes care of them. Thus, she attracts the attention of her husband and is in good contact with the children. Even this alone should make you fall in love with yourself.
Self-love protects us from various “nonsense” and bad deeds. And the more it is, the less we are prone to unjustified risk to life, addictions, self-inflicted bodily harm, etc.
Loving and understanding ourselves, we know what we want in life, realize our needs and make plans for the future.
Self-respect and adequate self-esteem always contribute to the fact that we can praise ourselves for our achievements and demonstrated strengths and are not afraid to admit our own weaknesses to ourselves. And this is very important for personal development.

The following tips from a psychologist will help you think and act in the right direction and decide how to love yourself and increase self-esteem.

How to please yourself: start to act

For starters, just smile! Right now. Let's! Do it without a mirror (so the smile will be more sincere). Feel what muscles are slightly tense at the same time, imagine how your eyes look. Sincere joy always manifests itself in them. You need to learn to smile with your eyes. This way you will like yourself and others more. Subsequently, you can train in front of the mirror, choosing for yourself the option that, in your opinion, is the most attractive smile. Do it regularly. After all, smiling, we activate the centers in the brain responsible for the feeling of happiness. And if we begin to feel something, it means that it is already present in our life.
Within 10 seconds, remember one of your positive traits that helped you succeed.. Most likely, at that moment you felt good and were pleased with yourself. Feel those emotions again and feel the joy. If it worked out then, then it will work out in the future, because this is your quality, and it will always be with you! And for sure there are other traits that make up the inner core and make you a strong personality. You just need to remember them and apply them in life.
Study yourself properly! Only without unnecessary self-digging and fixation on shortcomings. For example, devote a whole day to this. Write down on paper your strengths and weaknesses, your goals and values, dreams and plans for the future. Which of your main goals have already been achieved? What are not yet? Is there something you want but are afraid to do? Be sure to sum up, highlight your key qualities that are important to rely on, and the main goals you will strive for.
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Get rid of things you don't like. If, for example, you wear clothes that look completely unattractive and irritate you, then you direct the same emotions to yourself. Urgently review your wardrobe and outdoor space. Surround yourself with nice things. Let it be a few pieces of clothing in which you feel confident and comfortable; a picture, a souvenir or some kind of accessory that pleases the eye and uplifts the mood, etc. The color scheme around should also be pleasant for you. It is better to keep order on the desktop.
Your outer personal space and things around you are a reflection of your inner world. By managing one, you change the other.
Force yourself to take some drastic step. For example, bring the once started business to the end. Or do what you want for a long time, but do not dare or are afraid for some reason (of course, within the framework of what is permitted by law). Try to behave outside the box, go beyond the usual looped actions. For example, choosing a new route to return home (even if not entirely logical), organizing some interesting event for relatives and friends, visiting an unusual exhibition or performance, spending the weekend in a new way, etc.
Learn to tell yourself "STOP", as soon as you start to engage in self-flagellation and regret any committed actions. ACCEPT YOURSELF with all your weaknesses and failures (and at the same time with strength and resilience) is now the number one task! Everyone makes mistakes and they have the right to do so. And most do not stop loving themselves because of this. And any failures are an invaluable experience that helped you achieve what you have now, which makes you stronger and wiser.
Regularly track changes in yourself. You can even start a diary of comparisons. But you need to compare yourself not with other people, but with your former (former) self, what (what) you were before the moment you began to change your attitude towards yourself. Celebrate all your positive actions, the emergence of new useful traits and habits, praise yourself even for small achievements.

Comparing yourself to others is pointless, useless and ineffective. We are all unique in our own way, and everyone has their own way of development..

Take care of your body and health

Make sure you like your appearance. Just little tricks and wisdom can change your image. A new hairstyle or eyebrow shape, a different color of lipstick or eye shadow can sometimes work wonders and can help a woman love herself and boost her self-esteem. Sometimes, of course, more drastic changes may be required, for example, to correct the figure by joining the gym. Everything is in your hands, and you yourself determine the measure of the desired changes.
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You are the creator of your image. Only you!
Watch your posture. It is she who often betrays confidence or insecurity in a person. The same principle applies here as with a smile. Raise your head and look forward, straighten your shoulders and straighten your back - you will feel that you are becoming taller, more significant, more confident. Let's do it right now! First, it will be necessary to constantly control this position of the body, then a good habit of maintaining posture will appear. Remember everyone. What is this compared to a lifetime?!
It's time to start highlighting. It can be just relaxing or doing what you love. And no style objections: “Well, there’s no time at all!” or “Yeah, I don’t seem to need it.”- not accepted. You have the right to rest and private time. And the more you highlight it, the more you will begin to be convinced that you really deserve it. Enjoy happy moments!
Treat yourself and your body with pleasant treatments: massage, SPA, aromatic baths, etc. Do not forget that after 50 years this issue is very relevant.
Do the following exercises:
— Love your body!- Walk around the house naked for one day. Practice this once a week. This will help you accept yourself for who you are. This will save you the embarrassment of being on the beach during the swimming season. Remember, the main rule: if you love yourself, others will love you.
— Start your day with compliments!- Woke up. Went to wash up. Smile at yourself in the mirror. While brushing your teeth, you said 3-5 compliments to yourself in your head!
— Find the one!- ... the very phrase that would inspire you and give you strength and confidence. Perhaps it is already in your arsenal, but you forget to repeat it to yourself. Print it out (it is possible on a color printer, in a beautiful font) and put it in a small frame near the bed. When you wake up in the morning, do not forget to look at it and your day will start in a completely different way.
— Feel free to receive compliments and gifts. Remember, you deserve the best! Accept it! Surely you have met people who, perhaps, do not have the appearance of a model, and they do not shine with a big mind, but they have all the benefits in this life. So they have everything in order with self-esteem and they know for sure that everything they have, they deserve.

How to love yourself: be positive

Get involved and interested. A person who “burns” with something is always in a good mood, charged with positive energy. He has no time to be sad and worry about his shortcomings. Such people are full of enthusiasm and inspire others. They are satisfied with themselves, because they do what they like, and get a significant result. Therefore, it is important that you always have something to your liking.

Read more (mostly books), watch interesting programs and films, accumulate useful information, share it with others. It always promotes self-development.

Create more! The combination of mind and feelings allows us to realize an interesting task - to create. Someone builds, someone draws, writes books, designs, masters culinary skills. The more we create, the more we value ourselves. And the more often we do this, the higher our level of skill, and this is always an occasion to praise ourselves.
Do the following exercise. Write on a piece of paper in a column several times the same phrase: “I love ...” (at least 20 times) and continue it. Anything can be written:
- "I love ice cream",
- "I like to smile at people"
"I love it when my baby laughs"
- “I love to cook delicious food”, etc.
Don't think for a long time. The more phrases you want to write, the better. Love always reflects powerful life energy. The more we love everything and everyone around us, the more we are charged with this energy. We feel happier and respect ourselves.
Watch what you say. Your speech must be positive. Avoid phrases: "I don't like myself," "I don't like myself," "I'm not capable of ..." and the like. On the contrary, constantly remind and inspire yourself: “I love myself”, “I respect myself”, “I deserve it”, “I can handle it”, etc. Thought is material, and any words affect your mood and state. Consider such phrases as commands for action and sources of self-support. They have a scientific name - affirmations. Here are some examples:
“I am full of energy and constantly developing”,
"In my soul, peace and harmony",
"I like to do something nice for myself"
"I can find an approach to any person."

Get a “Good Mood Notebook” and write down all the phrases that you like, make you feel an influx of energy and make you act.

How to love yourself by interacting with others

communicate more. With your loved ones, friends, colleagues, as well as with strangers. make new acquaintances, be the first to take the initiative! In communication, speech, oratory skills, courage, the ability to find an approach to different people and interest them develop.
Give joy to others and do good deeds. Small gifts for relatives and friends, compliments and words of support, assistance in various situations - all this will help strengthen relationships with others and increase your self-esteem. And, of course, the feeling that we can make the world kinder, we add love to ourselves.
If you yourself experienced, as a child, a lack of love for yourself from loved ones, do not repeat this with your children.. It is important to realize this and forgive your parents, because they could have done some actions from a lack of experience and the presence of various fears. Accept this and do not transfer the hidden negative feelings to the children. Agree that you are no longer that child, but a mature person who herself chooses the most favorable way for raising her descendants. What you put in them, and what feelings you give them, will be reflected in their development, attitude towards themselves and success in the future.

In addition to your decisive action, you can read interesting and useful books on developing self-love by the following authors: “Reconcile body and spirit: 40 simple exercises”, Albin Michel, 2007, Louise L. Hay “Album of healing affirmations”, L. Breuning “ Hormones of happiness”, M.E. Litvak "If you want to be happy", E. Muir "Self-confidence", E. Lamott "Small victories", N. Rein "How to love yourself, or Mom for the Inner Child."

Especially for you, we have selected videos for you that will help you love yourself, accept yourself and forget such words as "I don't like myself."

Louise Hay

Simple steps to love yourself and raise your self-esteem.

We are a mirror of our relationship with our world. By accepting ourselves, we accept others. When we love ourselves, we love those around us. By building relationships with ourselves, we improve communication and understanding with them, become kinder and attract positive energy into our lives.

The following articles will also help you accept yourself, learn more about yourself, and deal with the most common problems every girl has.

Most of us perceive the age of 50 as a milestone, after which a full life ends. It seems that people who have crossed it lose intimacy and understanding with a loved one, their motivation for development and joy from their former hobbies disappear, and besides, they overcome chronic diseases. In general, life is steadily moving towards its decline.

But it's not like that at all! Life after 50 is in no way inferior to life in 30 or 40 years. Of course, no one questions the carefree enthusiasm and optimism of twenty-year-old young people who are hatching grandiose plans for life, but you should not think that it all ends by the age of fifty.

Many scientific studies and sociological surveys lead to unexpected conclusions, namely, people who have crossed the 50-year mark perceive the world around them more positively. At this age, a person's life is stable and measured, he is confident in himself, he has no fears for himself and his future. In addition, a person over 50 is more stress-resistant and has excellent control over his own emotions, which is undoubtedly an advantage over younger people.

Add to this the fact that people over 50 are better at managing their own time, which means they have much more time to relax and do things that really bring pleasure. For example, it allows you to devote yourself to a hobby for which there was not enough time before, to fulfill an old dream, and in general, to look more creatively at the opportunities that life gives.

Youth gives us enthusiasm and energy, which, as it seems, is enough for 100 years to come. However, over the years, the fuse gradually fades away. But is it worth worrying about? Now you don't have to sacrifice yourself to get up early in the morning and sit in the office until midnight. There comes a period in your life when you can feel the true taste of life, postponing things for later.

All this, of course, allows us to perceive the 50-year milestone more positively. And if you still do not feel this, it is only because too many prejudices associated with your age have taken root in your head. We will talk about them in this article.

10 things to stop doing after 50

1. Diet

You turned 50, and you are still looking for the right diet on the Internet to lose a couple of pounds? Drop this idea. First of all, you must understand that at your age, diets simply do not work!

After 45 years in the body of men and women there is a decrease in the production of hormones, which inevitably leads to weight gain. But if you have been eating right before and have not allowed yourself to get fat, this failure will not cause you any extra trouble. At most, you will gain 5-7 extra pounds, which is considered the norm for the age of “over 50”. If you have previously eaten improperly, allowed yourself fast food and abused sweets, there is no doubt that diets have not helped you much before. So is it worth torturing your body now? Attempts to deny yourself your favorite food and starve do not lead to positive results, and in the long run, all the more, they will play a cruel joke with you and add a dozen extra pounds!

Don't forget about peace of mind. From unsuccessful attempts to lose weight with the help of diets, your mood will deteriorate, which will invariably affect your well-being and quality of life.

2. Paint over gray hair

Noticing the gray strands, women, and sometimes men, begin to think about how to hide this clear sign of approaching old age. But this is self-deception! Trying to hide gray hair looks ridiculous, because age makes itself felt in many other ways, including wrinkles and discoloration of the skin.

But the point is not even that painting over gray hair will not allow you to hide your age. The whole point is that you just can’t come to terms with changes in your own appearance, don’t love yourself the way you are here and now. And this is a sign of disharmony, which prevents you from being liberated and getting real pleasure from life.

That is why do not deny yourself the pleasure of dyeing your hair when you want to change your appearance and change your image, but you should definitely not hide gray hair on purpose and worry about the appearance of new gray curls.

3. Postpone important things for later

We have already mentioned that after 50 years there comes a period when you have time and opportunities to fulfill your old dream and do what you are really interested in. Now is the time when you can make your dream come true. So, don't put it off until later!

Perhaps you dreamed of visiting one of the distant countries? Maybe you have always wanted to become a farmer, learn a foreign language or build a cottage? Perhaps you dreamed of enrolling in dance courses or traveling around the world on a bicycle? Now that your kids are grown up and you have a stable job, there is every reason to devote your life to your loved ones and do what you really always gravitated towards.

And even if you have a job and you can’t devote the whole day to yourself, be sure to carve out 1-2 hours exclusively for your own hobby. Do not hesitate, your life will only become brighter and happier from this.

4. Be ashamed of your mistakes

There is a prejudice inside many of us that a person at the age of 50 is ashamed to show his ignorance, it is inconvenient to ask for advice from others, and even more so to make mistakes that others may notice. But in fact, this is nothing more than prejudice.

A person cannot know absolutely everything, and therefore it is completely normal to be ashamed of some questions in those areas in which you absolutely do not understand. Even if you are asking for advice from a person who is much younger than you. Moreover, the fact that you ask questions while mastering a computer, newfangled gadgets or a modern car indicates that you are willing to keep up with the times and constantly develop. And it cannot cause other emotions except admiration!

Moreover, when you are over 50, you can safely tell others about the mistakes, mistakes and delusions that you encountered when you were young. There is nothing shameful in this, because it was only after passing through these obstacles that you became who you are now. Is it worth it to be embarrassed? Tell it with a smile, because the ability to self-irony is an important quality for a person who is liberated and free from prejudice.

5. “Dedicate” yourself to children and grandchildren

The appearance of grandchildren is a golden time for grandparents. I want to be closer to my own kids, spend more time with them, show them the world around them in the brightest colors and give them a happy childhood. Next to your grandchildren, you yourself become much younger.

All this is true, but with one caveat. Don't dedicate your life to your grandchildren. You should have time to look after the baby and play with him, but at the same time you should not forget your own desires and aspirations. A happy family is one in which you are supported in the realization of your aspirations.

Finally, practice shows that grandparents who occasionally help their children to look after their grandchildren, but at the same time are busy with their own development, receive, in the end, more gratitude than those who give their grandchildren all of themselves and all their time.

6. Repeat the past

By the age of 50, you have already accumulated enough experience and knowledge to do the usual work “on the machine”. But there is not much to be proud of here. The fact is that neural connections in the brain are not restored by themselves - the brain needs constant stimulation, and for this it is necessary to set new tasks for it as often as possible.

To do this is quite simple. If you are used to driving or going to work on a certain route, change it, let your brain find a new optimal path. If you've been breaststroke all your life, learn a new style of swimming. In fact, it is not so important what exactly you puzzle your brain with, it is important that new tasks are set before it, with which it will successfully cope. In this regard, learn something new that you have never done before. Remember, after 50, keeping your brain active is just as important as staying physically active.

7. Worry about what others think

By the age of 50, it's time to stop paying attention to what they say behind your back. You have already lived long enough to understand that all these gossip and gossip only affect the one who pays attention to them. You have already formed your own vision of the world, your own views on fashion and hobbies, and therefore worrying about whispering behind your back, and even more so worrying that your behavior will be condemned, is at least stupid.

After fifty years, there comes a special time - the time of emancipation, when it should become completely unimportant to you what people will say. Do you want to wear a mini skirt? Would you like to go to a nightclub and "break away" as in your youth? Or maybe you are still embarrassed to remind someone of this promise or unreturned money? Allow yourself whatever you really desire and be honest about what you really care about! Believe me, understanding this makes life a lot easier.

Almost every woman can create the right wardrobe and look stylish at 50 years old. The main thing in this matter is desire, attention and a wise approach. World stylists advise to concentrate on classic clothes and basic things.

To look stylish, give up cheap things and materials. Filling the wardrobe, bet on the quality of clothing, not its quantity. However, in this case, remember: each new purchased part must be in harmony with the existing ones.

Avoid deep necklines, vulgar mini, tight-fitting and shapeless outfits. Even if your figure is impeccable, you can demonstrate it in another way. For example, emphasize beautiful breasts with a beautiful necklace, and toned legs with a pencil skirt or classic cut shorts. Extra pounds will perfectly disguise a fitted sheath dress or a trouser suit made of dense fabric with an elongated jacket. So you will look stylish and flawless.

Rethink your wardrobe colors. Visually “throw off” age will help things in beige, white, light gray shades. Also, do not ignore trendy pastel colors, especially soft pink, peach, mint, milky and sunny yellow. Black is versatile and practical, but try not to oversaturate your wardrobe with it.

It is not necessary to completely abandon saturated colors. Many middle-aged women choose outfits in red, blue, green, orange and other bright colors. However, in this case, it is necessary to ensure that the chosen shade does not make you visually older.

Essential items in a stylish woman's wardrobe

To look stylish at 50, make basic things the basis of your wardrobe. Shirts, chiffon blouses, cardigans, jackets, skirts and trousers should fit perfectly on you, be in size. Do not ignore jeans: they are comfortable and practical for everyday worries. However, choose classic models, with slightly flared or straight legs.

For an evening out, pick up some beautiful dresses. Choose products that are fitted, straight or slightly tapered to the bottom. The length can be both "on the floor", and slightly below and slightly above the knees. If the figure allows, do not be afraid to choose sexy models. For example, dresses made of lace or with a cutout on the back.

Shoes are an important part of a woman's wardrobe. At the age of 50, high heels for many lose their relevance. To look stylish, opt for shoes with a classic silhouette with a stable heel. If the legs are not full, you can safely wear. These shoes are both elegant and comfortable.

Be sure to add eye-catching accessories to your look. They perfectly diversify the ensemble, help to make it bright and saturated. Feel free to choose colored beads, catchy bracelets, beautiful brooches. Do not forget about wide-brimmed hats, scarves, stoles.

The latter can become a full-fledged detail of the ensemble. Beautifully tying it or elegantly throwing it on, you can easily hide the fullness of the arms and shoulders. This trick is especially relevant when creating a stylish evening look.

Wide things will hide high growth. Fashionable voluminous coats made of fine wool, high-waisted dresses, sweaters - all this helps to visually become lower. Long wide skirts and straight trousers also contribute to this.

Large bags will divert the attention of others from high growth. These fashion accessories are very suitable for girls with the appearance of fashion models, since only in their hands they do not look like huge trunks. On the contrary, coupled with high growth, they look very organic, making their mistress more elegant.

Blouses and shirts with a square or boat neckline add volume to the shoulders, visually shortening the silhouette. T-shirts with a shortened bottom also contribute to this. They should end at the waist. Then the upper body will look shorter.

Breeches and cropped trousers visually shorten the legs when worn with flat shoes.

The silhouette is reduced by long coats and fur coats. Wide things, as well as products with a long pile, do their job especially well.

A wide belt will divide the silhouette in half, making it visually a little lower. It can be fixed clearly at the waist - then the torso will look shorter, or on the hips - then the legs will seem less long.

Attractiveness has no age, a woman can look great at 40, 50, and 70 years old. The secret of beauty lies in a special attitude towards oneself, in the ability to enjoy life, not to lose heart.

Instruction

Do you want to look 40 at 50? Stop thinking about age, because beauty acquires a special charm over the years. Wear clothes that suit you, but do not get carried away with youthful style, it will only emphasize your years. Three things must certainly be present in a casual wardrobe: a light blouse, loose trousers made of thick fabric, a classic or wrap skirt. Jackets and vests correspond to this age, their combination with trousers and a skirt will create interesting ensembles. Do not refuse jeans, they should be without rhinestones, scuffs, embroidery.

Pay attention to the color scheme, ladies at an elegant age will suit soft gentle tones, pastel shades. From dark colors, give preference to black, chocolate, gray. Exclude saturated pink, purple, green colors, they age the skin.

Take care of your hair: paint over the gray hair, choose a natural color that suits your skin tone; make a stylish hairstyle, if the hair is short, the haircut should have a perfect shape. Style long hair in elegant buns; braids adorn women at all times and at any age.

Watch your figure, full ladies look older than their slender peers. Exercise, include more fruits and vegetables in your diet. Beauty and youth are directly dependent on proper nutrition. After 50 years, bone mass decreases, so eat cottage cheese, low-fat cheese, yogurt, nuts. Support muscle tone lean boiled meat, seafood, legumes. If you want to stay young, stop overeating, drink more clean water, reduce salt intake.

Carefully look after appearance - attractiveness and beauty depend on it. Visit a beauty salon, do procedures such as peeling, masks with. Help with skin care home remedies. A good way to keep your skin young and supple is to wipe it with ice cubes daily. After this procedure, apply a nourishing cream on your face and massage your face. With the pads of your fingers, make circular movements counterclockwise for a minute.

Helpful advice

Paraffin or gelatin masks smooth wrinkles well. For a paraffin mask, take a towel, paraffin, a brush, plastic wrap with slits for the eyes and nose. Warm up the paraffin in a water bath, apply with a brush on the face, wait until it cools down and spread the next layer, repeat 4-5 times. Cover your face with a film, hold the mask for 30 minutes, rinse with warm water, lubricate the skin with a moisturizer. The procedure can be done once a week.

According to many celebrities who have crossed the fifty-year milestone, the basis for maintaining beauty is the harmony of soul and body and self-love. For example, the actress Monica Bellucci tries to pamper her body with a contrast shower if she has no filming, practically does not use makeup, eats organic foods, uses homeopathic remedies, almost never drinks alcohol, avoids sunburn, drinks a lot of water, pays due attention to a full sleep, every few hours sprays the face with thermal water.

And the singer Jennifer Lopez restores strength helps timely rest, healthy sleep, the absence of bad habits, avoiding sunburn. According to the Latin American diva, this is the whole secret of her attractiveness, and thanks to such simple tricks, you can look great at any age.

Scientists have proven that after the onset of menopause, the female body loses calcium and proteins. Hence the occurrence of a large number of diseases. Thus, it is necessary to include in your diet as many foods rich in protein and calcium as possible: soy, cottage cheese, various types of cheeses, celery, legumes, milk, sardines, sprats. It is also recommended to take vitamins and dietary supplements containing easily digestible calcium.

In addition, after 50 years, sports training should not be excluded so that the body is always in good shape. In addition to the benefits, exercise should be fun and energizing. It is best to do yoga, fitness, swimming, Pilates. Such training contributes to the regeneration of bone tissue and makes it easier to endure the troubles associated with the onset of menopause.

Regarding the schedule of classes and their intensity, you should consult with a professional trainer. At the same time, experienced fitness fans should devote more time to warming up, but less time to strength exercises, and beginners should combine strength and aerobic training. If you have health problems, you should consult with your doctor beforehand.

At the age of about 50, makeup artists recommend reconsidering your attitude to makeup. Some women in this period of life go to extremes - they begin to paint too brightly, or completely stop using cosmetics. Both of these options are fundamentally wrong. Makeup is needed in any case, but in such a situation it should look as natural as possible.
Also, do not abuse tonal means. Sometimes you can do with a simple powder. You should not paint your lips with too dark lipstick, and your eyes with shimmering shades of defiant colors.