How to overcome pride in yourself. How to get rid of pride? Murmuring blocks the mercy of God

A person is an emotional person who has developed his own life rules. He has a huge energy reserve, through his feelings he expresses his own attitude towards others and the world, but what energy this person’s thoughts are endowed with, and what kind of emotions he shows when communicating with other people, depends solely on him and his desires. What is pride, and why is it a sin for people - let's try to find out further.

Pride - what is it?

Pride - a feeling of complete superiority one's personality over others. It is an inadequate assessment of personal importance. The manifestation of pride very often leads to stupid mistakes, because of which others suffer. This sin manifests itself in arrogance, not showing respect for other people, their lives and experiences. People with a heightened sense of pride have an increased desire to brag about their accomplishments. They consider their success only their merit, not taking into account the help of others and higher powers in ordinary life situations, do not recognize the help and support of others.

In Latin, "pride" is translated as "superbia". It is a sin, because every quality of a person is laid down by the Creator. And to consider yourself the source of all your achievements in life and that everything around you is the result of personal labor is fundamentally wrong. Criticism of the actions and speech of other people, the accusation of insolvency, rude ridicule - it amuses people with pride, brings them untold pleasure.

Very often a person does not even realize that he is subject to pride and thinks this is some other quality of his character. . But then it gets worse– as a result, a person is completely immersed in this sin. How can it be discerned in oneself and in other people in order to stop in time and protect oneself from sin? To do this, you need to familiarize yourself and learn to distinguish between such signs of sin:

It is these signs that are often confused with pride itself., sometimes take these signs as virtues, but only when they take first place in a person’s character and begin to lead him. After that, a person is unable to control himself, and this inevitably leads to harm to himself and those around him.

There is different types this sin. It may be an age-related kind of pride. When adults treat the little ones with disdain, because they are still very stupid and naive due to their age. Or, conversely, young people believe that older people do not understand anything in current trends and their outlook on life is outdated.

There is a pride of knowledge. When a person considers himself the smartest, and everyone around is fools.

Pride of beauty. Basically, this sin is on women who consider themselves the most beautiful, and other women unworthy of compliments and love.

national pride. People believe that their nation is superior to others, and some nations do not even have the right to exist. An example of this sin can be considered the views of the Germans on the Jewish nation during the Second World War? Why is this not an indicator of the manifestation of pride in full measure and not the result of the complete mastery of sin by some Germans.

There are a sufficient number of types of pride, each type is manifested in one or another sphere of human life and activity.

The results of this sin

Pride mainly acts as a source of bad thoughts and emotions that negatively affect the state and behavior of people, in other words, prevent them from living a "correct" life, since an overestimated sense of the importance of one's "I" becomes the starting point of aggression towards people around. Other ideas about the world give rise to inside a flash of the following emotions: anger, resentment, hatred, contempt, envy and pity. They lead to absolute destruction in the first place. mental health man, respectively, and his consciousness.

Pride and psychology

This sin often becomes a sign of wrong education. AT early age parents often tell their child that he is better than others. However, the baby should receive praise and support, but only on a specific, real occasion. False praise will form an inflated self-esteem, which will invariably lead to pride. Such children, having matured, will not be able to realistically assess their own shortcomings. An example of this is that they do not know from childhood about criticism against them, and they will not be able to perceive it as adults.

As a rule, such a sin brings discord in communication.- after all, maintaining a friendly relationship with a proud person is a dubious pleasure. No one wants to feel humiliated from the very beginning, listen to long monologues about someone's perfection and rightness, the lack of steps towards a compromise will not lead to anything good. A proud person never recognizes the talents and abilities of another.

Pride in Orthodoxy

This is the main sin in Orthodoxy, since it is he who is the source of other human vices: greed, anger. The salvation of the human soul is based on the concept- The Lord is above all. Then you need to love your neighbor, sacrificing your interests and desires. But pride does not accept debt to another person, it does not have a feeling of pity. Virtue that eradicates pride, humility.

The current society imposes the view that a woman can do without a male representative. Pride in women does not recognize a family in which the man is the main and his opinion is the main one. Women in such relationships do not recognize the correctness of their husband, constantly show their independence, as proof, and try to subjugate the man to themselves. For such women, it is important to be a leader and a winner, without deviating from their principles. It is not possible for such a woman to make sacrifices for her own family. Similar pictures are drawn to us modern society .

Total control, the habit of "drip on the brain" and female irritability - poison family life. Each quarrel ends only after the man admits his own wrong and the woman's ego wins. Forcing a man to exalt a woman for every little thing diminishes the feeling dignity so love dies. And the man wants to break off any relationship.

Get rid of this sin

When a person realizes what sin he carries in himself, and there is a desire to get rid of it, then the question immediately arises: how to get rid of it? This is not to say that it is very easy to do this. After all, to get rid of Bad quality character must go through a long and hard way, to realize the sources of the appearance of sin, and most importantly - to make every effort to deliverance, since the struggle will go on with oneself.

Freedom from this sin the way to the knowledge of oneself and God, each subsequent step must be deliberate and confident. To do this, remember the following rules:

be in love the world as he is;
to learn to perceive any situation that occurs in life without offense and indignation, each time to show gratitude to God for what was sent to them, because all circumstances are something new and useful;
be able to see positive sides in any position, although by no means always noticeable at first glance, since often awareness comes after some time.

Fighting pride

There are situations when a person himself can no longer do anything with himself to overcome pride. In such a situation, one should ask for help from "senior comrades", listen to their wise instructions and be able not to refuse them. This will help you get on the true path, the path of resistance, and will also give you the opportunity to step further along the path of self-knowledge.

Most effective method in the fight against sin - serving relatives, society, the world and God. By giving himself to others, a person changes because environment becomes different - cleaner, brighter and more righteous. No wonder the sages say: "Change yourself - everything around will change."

"Feeling own importance makes a person
hopeless: heavy, clumsy and empty.
Being a warrior means being light and fluid."
Carlos Castaneda

This article will be slightly different in content from those in which we talk about what you need to do in order to become a successful person.

Imagine that you have already gone your way to success. You have achieved your goals. You are a successful and confident person. Or are you a person who has realized that he is moving along the right way, you succeed, and you know that you will be able to achieve all the tasks set for yourself. There are no unsolvable problems for you. All questions you solve confidently, deliberately and with dignity. It is at this stage, when a person thinks that he can cope with any situation, that there are no unsolvable questions, a test awaits him. It's called pride.

In this article, we will look at ways that help overcome human pride in order not to lose everything that you have managed to achieve. It often happens that a person, having begun to be proud of himself, ceases to see reality as it really is. As a result, he stops in his development or loses everything that he managed to achieve.
Pride comes from a lack of self-knowledge

Where does pride come from?

It is characteristic that most often those people who initially had problems with own self-esteem. Being an insecure person, having mastered several tricks, thanks to which one can achieve success, and putting them into practice, in case of success, a person thinks that now he can do anything.

A person begins to believe that he is the wisest and most talented person in the whole world. Such a position is immediately reflected in the behavior of a person, manifested in his attitude towards others, subordinates, relatives. Arrogance and intolerance appear in manners. Man thinks he is omnipotent. But here the law of balance comes into force, as a result of which a proud person can be very abruptly returned to his place.

Whether you or someone you know is experiencing a test of pride can be judged by characteristics that appear in proud people:

unjustifiably high conceit and self-confidence;
unwillingness and inability to perceive new information, learn;
disregard for others;
inability to focus on work.

In fact, merit successful individuals in their achievements is not absolute. Man owes much to the universe. Therefore, pride is not a privilege successful person. This is an amateur activity that can be stopped in a moment.

A self-confident and proud person bears many losses: a good relationship with relatives, friends, colleagues. Moreover, it often happens that it is those people with whom a person loses contact that helped him become what he has become. A proud person creates a trap for himself, forcing the law of balance to work against him.

In order to better understand the degree of the Universe's contribution to the development of a successful person, let's consider what the Universe actually does:

gives a person the most suitable area in which he can maximize his potential;
constantly "leads" a person, directing him to the goal;
warns against making wrong steps;
surrounds a person with events and people who help in achieving the goal.

Thus, it becomes obvious that the merit of the person himself in what he managed to achieve is not as great as it might seem to him. The man walked along the most effective path offered to him, which was chosen for him. As soon as a person begins to be proud, the Universe stops helping him, which inevitably leads to a cascade of problems. The universe is capable of both raising a person to the very top, and dumping him overnight. This must always be remembered.

Why is high self-esteem dangerous?

If you were able to achieve material well-being, this does not mean at all that you better than that who does not have the same as you.

Any person can turn out to be much richer than you spiritually, he can, without having a serious, in your understanding, prosperity, be much happier than you, because he lived his life in harmony. If you have been able to achieve major success, use your resources to help other people who need help. Praising your own achievements, constantly showing off to others can overwhelm people from your environment.

In an effort to communicate your successes, you can instill in the other person insecurity and dissatisfaction with yourself. As a result, this will lead to the fact that they will try to reduce communication with you or stop it altogether. Your achievements are visible without the fact that you report them. If you want to keep in touch with people close to you, it is not necessary to brag about your own successes. Let people in your company be comfortable and calm.

Inflated self-esteem contributes to the idea that a person has no need to study more. He knows everything and can do everything. However, no matter how confident a person is in his knowledge, to consider that there is nothing more to learn is big mistake. Having made the decision to stop further education, a person stops, he stops moving in the direction of development. There are always people who have deeper knowledge than we do. Stopping is the same as going back. For some time, a person will stay afloat, but with the advent of other, more active and interested personalities, he will very quickly lose his position.

Loss of focus is another consequence of pride. Moving towards the goal, a person must see the next one. And so on ad infinitum. If reach certain result and stop there - this is the beginning of the way back. New target gives impetus to development. Her absence is destructive.

How to get rid of pride?

In order to learn how to deal with pride and arrogance, a person needs to develop in himself such a quality as humility. Of course, achieving a certain result or a set goal, a person is filled with joy. But it is important not to let the emerging emotions transform into a sense of pride. This process is often difficult to control. It is difficult not to praise yourself, realizing that you were able to overcome all the difficulties. At this stage, it is necessary to connect reason and humility.

Humility can be achieved by realizing that this achievement is only part of the journey. There are still many unresolved tasks ahead, each of which may turn out to be overwhelming. When a person feels that a sense of pride and arrogance in relation to others is growing in him, it is necessary to begin work aimed at returning his personality to the "earth". It is better if the person himself does this, and not the Universe.

Being grateful also helps to cope with the feeling of pride. If we thank people, circumstances, the Universe for each of our successes, we are unlikely to have thoughts that we owe our success only to ourselves. Thank you sincerely. Gratitude teaches humility.

Be sure that, having managed to achieve success, you will be able to keep it and not stop on your way, constantly moving forward. Share your success with those who need it and you will be even more rewarded.

Is pride a sign of weakness or is it a strength? Pride is a trait necessary to a person or most likely interfering with it? It is important to solve these questions for yourself, because it is this trait that can change a lot in a person’s life.
Often in the modern world, people are guided by proud people. It is NOT rare that these are not at all worthy role models, but such people often achieve so-called success. And gentleness and humility is considered a weakness of character, which is no longer applicable in the modern world. However world history and personal experience those who faced with pride show that everything is exactly the opposite!
It's worth it though what is true pride and true humility.

After all, any advantage can become a minus,

and some disadvantage can be turned into dignity!

What is pride?

Pride is a feeling of respect for oneself, as well as satisfaction from something.
As mentioned above, pride can be appropriate and inappropriate.

Appropriate pride.

Appropriate pride has a connotation joy for some achievement, for the success of their children etc. It warms the heart and gives self-confidence and encourages to do good further.
For example, before honest man a situation has arisen that prompts him to compromise his conscience and his convictions, but he does not give in to it. For example, he does not steal or cheat at work, although he has the opportunity to not be punished for this. After the temptation is overcome, he feels pride in his rod and that he has not shown weakness.
Also, if such a person teaches children to act honestly and not succumb to the bad influence of others, he will be proud if his child does this, especially if his parents are not around. For example, the child did not support some correct behavior class during the lesson and parent meeting the teacher praised, personally or in front of everyone, the parent for good upbringing child. Also, the parent will be proud of their child and in turn will praise him and this will encourage both to continue to act in the same spirit.

Misplaced pride.

Such pride is often not justified or has only external motives for pride.

For example, to be proud of achieving some of your goals, for example, studying or working in a prestigious place that you managed to get only thanks to connections or money, is not appropriate. Also, often talents and abilities can cause a sense of pride, although talent and skills can be acquired.
So, if a parent praises a child only for his abilities, then this nurtures misplaced pride in the child. When such children face reality, they don't understand why they are not admired by everyone and everywhere. It is also difficult for such people to start making efforts. To master new area employment and succeed in something else.
Talents and abilities are good. It's nice when something works out without special efforts. But those areas where a person has achieved success through effort and perseverance are worthy of real, appropriate pride and adequate self-respect.

The price of pride.

You have to pay for everything, and pride also has its price.

If a person does not work on himself to overcome pride, then there will be consequences. Unfortunately, many people realize this too late and have to pay high price for your carelessness. What is the price of pride?
In family.
Pride has no place in loving family. Pride in the family is manifested in the unwillingness to give in and take into account the opinion of another. Also, a proud spouse can generally make decisions without even informing his companion. The pride of one of the spouses encourages you to think only about your needs, for example, physical, emotional or sexual.
Children who have adopted the proud behavior of their parents then behave in the same way in their families and are often not grateful to their parents.
Thus, the price of pride is quite high for those who wanted to have a strong family in the full sense of the word. These families are not happy. for real and it is visible to the naked eye.
In society.
Pride is often the cause of even world clashes and conflicts. Unwillingness to help, give in and appreciate Natural resources start wars that only make matters worse.
However, in the mini scale there is another price list of pride prices. For example, a proud person may not have true friends. Pride can generally prevent a person from calmly contacting others.
At work, it is difficult for the proud to listen to the leadership of the boss, and therefore interpersonal conflicts inevitable.
Health.
Pride makes a person irritable, constantly dissatisfied with something, and this negatively affects his physical health. nervous system becomes shaky and very sensitive to the slightest stimuli.
The digestive system can malfunction under stress.
The endocrine glands (thyroid, pancreas, adrenal glands) suffer from stress and this aggravates their hard work.
From stress and frequent conflicts suffers and cardiovascular system. Often such people become hypertensive.
Agree, how high the price of pride is! Therefore, it is worth considering whether there is inappropriate pride in your character and how to overcome pride? And it is possible to overcome pride!

How to overcome pride?

Overcome selfishness.

Selfishness and pride often go hand in hand. A person who does not respect the opinions of others is too focused on himself. Of course, you need to respect and love yourself, but in moderation.
Motivator against selfishness.
Egoist - emotionally mature or not? want to be more mature? Fight with pride!!!
Think about your emotional development. Often people who are emotionally mature are not so focused on themselves, but are more willing to give to others.

So put yourself goal is more give than expect from others and receive.

An egoist is a welcome friend and guest or not?
Think about how an egoist looks from the outside, how egoists are usually not willing to deal with and how difficult it is for them to give something even to their closest ones.
Recall examples of how an egoist got burned when he lost good friends because of his character.

Respect others.

Pride is the opposite of respect for others. The proud one wants to be respected, but he himself does not show much attention and respect.
Think:
Can other people have a different point of view than yours?
Can other people dislike what you love and like what you don't like?
Can others make decisions based solely on their head, or should they be led by you?
Of course, parents and educators have power over children, but this means something else.
For example, in a family, husband and wife may have different preferences Let's say on vacation. The husband just wants to sit in front of a newspaper or TV, and the wife wants to take a walk and even chat with someone and go to visit. Does this mean that one of them is more right? Of course not! This is simple different points view and different needs that are entitled to be. So pride has no place here. Both husband and wife can yield in certain cases and compromise in order to please their life partner. A husband may someday give in and go on a visit with his wife, and a wife may one day just sit at home and give her husband an emotional break from communicating with others. In any case, if each of the spouses sees that the other is trying and does not just want to dominate, then it will be easier to give in.
Also with friends. If your friend doesn't share your music, emotional needs 100%, it does not mean that he is wrong, but you are right. It’s just that you are different, but this is not an obstacle to friendship, but rather diversifies it.
Of course, it is worth remembering about bad campaigns that you don’t need to adapt to and turn a blind eye to the obvious bad consequences of communicating with them. There is no need to give in to a bad deed. This is exactly where you need to show respect for yourself and refuse to do something immoral, immoral.

Ask for forgiveness.

Pride makes it difficult to say: "I'm sorry, I was wrong."

Therefore, you need to purposefully work on this expression in your speech. If you have been reprimanded and pointed out your mistake, then do not be afraid to say words of apology and regret. It is worth mentioning your motives, the non-intentionality of your actions, which will contribute to your speedy forgiveness.

At the end of the day, try to analyze your behavior, speech and identify manifestations of pride and understand who and how you offended.

Gather all your willpower and ask for forgiveness, even if only very briefly. For example, you can write SMS and even a note on the table for your wife.

This will be a real victory! This simple exercise will definitely help you overcome pride over time!
Another way is to ask for forgiveness right away. This will help the offended person to quickly forgive you and you not to worry. If you understand. that you offended someone with your pride, then immediately say that you regret your words or deed and sincerely ask for forgiveness. Most likely, the person will appreciate these words and you will be friends again.

Praise people.

The pride of a person makes it difficult to think. that others also have success worthy of praise. Therefore, the praise of others is the antidote to pride.
For example, you see that your subordinate is doing his job very diligently, then just come up and say that he is “Well done!”. If you see that your friend has received a promotion or he has some joy in life, then praise him for his determination and victory!
If the wife has prepared a delicious lunch or dinner, the husband may praise her for her culinary efforts. And if the husband is well versed in something and he succeeds in something, then the wife will not forget to praise him too.

Learn to wait.

To overcome pride helps patience and the ability to wait. Pride encourages to consider his plans more important than everyone and everything and does not like to wait for anyone. Of course, waiting is unpleasant, but anything can happen to a person and the reasons for the delay can be very valid.
Therefore, if you see that someone is delayed, then occupy yourself at this time with some useful thing. Do not leave immediately as soon as the hands stand exactly at your agreed time (perhaps someone else's watch itself is simply lagging behind).

Chat with different people.

Pride limits the circle of communication and such a person communicates only with people who are convenient for him, that is, who are never late, never get confused with thoughts and have a certain education.
Therefore, if you see a person in front of you who is not with such brilliant abilities as yours, then do not ignore communication with him. It is this person who will help you develop patience, humility and self-control. He will be your trainer for these qualities.
Let the other person finish the thought.
Don't interrupt.
Do not seize the initiative in a conversation.
Praise him for any knowledge of something.
Do not make a tired facial expression and tone of voice.
Say that next time you will continue the conversation and that it was a pleasure to talk to you.

Listen for real

Ask for help.

Pride makes it difficult to ask someone for help. Proud people, even if they cannot cope with the problem, they simply try to keep silent about their failure, but do not ask anyone or anything. Therefore, tune in that if you really need someone's help, then you will ask for it. You may not need anything specific, but just a word of support and understanding.
For example, a husband may tell his wife that he is worried about the family budget or about raising teenage children who are becoming increasingly difficult to raise properly. The wife will certainly assure her husband of her support and this will strengthen the family.
A wife can tell her husband her needs directly and tactfully, rather than waiting for him to guess. A husband cannot read his wife's thoughts, no matter how well he knows her and how long they have been in the tank. Therefore, the wife can say exactly what she needs the help of her husband and, as verified by many examples, the husband willingly responds when the request is formulated simply and tactfully.

Find real friends.

The social circle greatly influences the character, even if your character is not weak.
It is important to remember the cucumber example. Whichever side the cucumber is in the jar, it will still become salty. The same with communication - it still affects, it's just a matter of time.
Therefore, if there are people around you for whom pride is acceptable, then this will affect you and it will be very difficult to overcome pride. So finding real friends is worthwhile goal. Such friends will help you to be more gentle and approachable and happier. Such friends will love and cherish you not for your money, but for your qualities. Such friends will not leave you when you are in trouble, as many proud ones will do.
So, you have already become less proud if you read this article. At least you have already thought about this quality itself and decided to think and start acting. Therefore, you are definitely great and you will be able to overcome pride !!! Good luck!!!

Read helpful articles below.

In the modern world, the concepts of pride and pride are often confused with each other. People perceive them as one and the same or something very similar. Meanwhile, these two entities have completely different meaning. If the first concept indicates a sense of self-worth, self-sufficiency, then the second speaks of complex nature, internal unresolved issues personality. Signs of pride are often a feeling of injustice, irritation. Such a person always believes that he was wrongfully offended. This article focuses on the issue of pride and explains how it differs from pride. We will look at the components of each of the concepts in order to understand what is the danger of cultivating this feeling in oneself and how it can be overcome.

Pride and pride. Differences

Both concepts have the same root, which means they are derivatives of vanity, narcissism and arrogance. However, in the case of pride, the manifestation of a sense of false superiority over others is not as pronounced as with pride. In the modern world, you can be proud of your homeland, your own achievements, loved ones. And pride comes from pathological self-doubt.

Self-esteem

It is unlikely that anyone will argue with what to respect and appreciate own personality necessary. Without healthy self-love, there is no development, just as it is impossible to fully advance, reveal talents and one's own capabilities. A person should have a sense of pride. Otherwise, anyone can manipulate and use it for their own purposes. But, at the same time, any should be moderate. You can’t see the catch in everything, but in people - worst enemies or cheaters. Unfortunately, the realities of modern reality are such that many of us have to go through numerous trials that are accompanied by pain, resentment and disappointment. But this is not at all a reason to become a weak, embittered person, is it? On the contrary, it is necessary to gather all your will and a good beginning in order to maintain faith in the best and in people.

Trust in the world

How more people located to others, the more open he is towards himself, the easier it becomes for him to accept the new. Trust in the world consists of several components, such as: the situation in the family where a person lives, the attitude of the people around him, own desires and dreams, character, temperament. Pride, most often, subjugates people, makes them not free, hostages of their fears. One who is proud cannot really be happy. He does not know how to truly trust, to open towards relationships. Just a proud person is able to recognize the feelings of another, he empathizes, helps others, but at the same time does not lose himself.

selfishness

Pride always makes a person an egoist. With no exceptions. Concentrating only on your experiences, it is impossible to think about others, to bring real help to others. A person who has not managed to curb his pride will not be able to really feel the feelings of loved ones, will remain deaf to spiritual impulses. Pride sometimes adds strength to a person, helps to understand the essence of what is happening, while pride sometimes deprives one of common sense.

Development

In order to fully progress life path Man is constantly evolving. The essence of development is not only learning new things. It is extremely important to work on your own shortcomings, learn from what is happening, let go of the past in time. Pride can handle this, pride, more often than not, makes a person suffer further.

Narcissism

Overly proud people are often accused of not being attentive enough to the needs of others. Meanwhile, if a proud person simply does not let himself be offended and therefore gives the impression of an impregnable loner, then the one who is led by genuine pride still tries to subordinate those around him to his own worldview, to impose his point of view on them. Narcissism, or, in this case should be considered as psychological protection personality from feelings of inferiority.

Essence of Pride

Pride, like any personality characteristic, includes several structural components. Simply put, pride has three main components that keep it alive.

Pride is a mortal sin

In Christianity, as in any religion, pride is considered a great sin. The fact is that according to religious beliefs, there is no particular difference between pride and pride. Pride should also be condemned, as well as pride, and therefore the observance of divine commandments is an integral element of religious canons. There is an opinion that one who is proud cannot truly open his heart to true love. Such a person cares, first of all, about himself and his interests. All he cares about is that his needs are met.

The overthrow of pride occurs through deep repentance and overcoming in oneself negative qualities character. It is impossible to overcome pride in oneself if a person consciously does not go for it. “Pride is a sin,” the Bible says, and all spiritual teachers past and present agree with this statement.

How to get rid of pride?

Often people who experience serious difficulties in life through the fault of their own character, they ask themselves: how to deal with pride? After all, it prevents you from leading a full life, with pride, you are likely to lose old friends, but you will not gain new ones.

Pride makes both the person himself and his environment suffer. To overcome this quality of character in yourself, you need to work long and hard, work on yourself. The following tips can be constructive methods how to overcome pride.

Respect others

Show genuine interest in the needs of others. If you respect their dreams, then no one will judge yours. Respect for others begins with acceptance of one's relatives. It is extremely important to accept loved ones for who they are, and not try to remake them. Vanity and pride cannot help in this. It is necessary to completely reconsider your feelings and attitude towards loved ones.

Pride dulls the feeling of closeness of souls, kinship of relationships, patience and humility. It is known that a proud person is not able to retreat from his own claims, he goes to the end, achieves the goal at any cost. To overcome this quality in yourself, just try to think at least sometimes how the other person feels. Imagine yourself in the place of your friend, to whom you did not understand why you were rude, or your father. Do you think it was pleasant for these people to hear sharp remarks or unfair accusations from you? Analyze your own actions more often, then the feelings of other people will gradually begin to open up to you, you will understand their experiences.

be careful

If you want to be useful people then be more careful with them. It is worth starting to notice even small things, as you will see how much easier life has become. It is important that the degree of trust between you and your relatives increases day by day. Even if they have not noticed such manifestations of care for you before, do not worry: your efforts will someday be objectively evaluated anyway. You should not admire your pride and consider it your main thing. warm, trusting relationship sometimes it takes years to build between people, but it's worth it.

Also pay attention to own feelings. If you note in detail what is happening inside you, you will understand that you feel much better when you give joy to others, even if it is fleeting, short-lived. Take time to take care of your parents, sisters, brothers, friends. Take a closer look, perhaps one of them needs your help at the moment? Do not miss this opportunity to improve and overcome your pride.

Don't be afraid to break stereotypes

Most people all their lives act in a certain way, not at all assuming that it is possible to act differently. For every event in life, a normal act has already been “invented” that would reflect the essence. Just think about how much we ourselves schematize everything and turn it into a routine, and meanwhile, each event is unique and unrepeatable in itself. For example, it is customary to congratulate young parents on the birth of a child, on New Year give gifts. Perhaps someone does not celebrate everyone's favorite holiday and he does not want to make a feast just because it is customary.

Remember, every event, even if it has been repeated on earth millions of times, is unique. Accordingly, for each situation you need to find your own individual approach, which is the most suitable for this case. Pride cannot be admired, pride must be overcome and let go. Allow yourself to experience feelings, even if they are negative. Just start taking any action from the moment you understand the mistakes and focus on constructive solution. Having overcome pride, you will feel incredible lightness and mature self-esteem.

love yourself

Usually a person is able to hurt another only when he himself is experiencing a strong dissatisfaction with life. Otherwise, there would be no need to offend a loved one. In fact, everything that is said in a fit of anger is addressed not to the person to whom everything is expressed, but to oneself. If each of us had the ability to listen to our own words, then there would be no need for pride. After all, nothing can be achieved with pride.

Love yourself and see how you don't want to use pride anymore. Self-love awakens harmony in the human soul and gives rise to satisfaction. There will be no trace of pride.

Find your purpose

Note to yourself, are you living your own life? After all, how often does it happen that a person follows the opinion of the majority, is influenced from outside and chooses a completely different path. Purpose should be understood as the purpose with which we come to this physical world. And it's up to us how we do it. Pride has no place among those who strive for a whole, fulfilling life. The search for a destination, of course, is an important component of human life, and therefore it is important to approach this process with all responsibility.

If you, despite mature age, have not yet found their own unique path, it's time to decide on the direction. Listen to yourself, remember your youthful dreams. Maybe it's time to fulfill the most cherished desire? There will be no trace of your former pride when you find yourself. This is a long and exhausting work that requires maximum honesty and full dedication. Anyone who is dissatisfied with his pride and intends to replace it with a more positive feeling should carefully monitor his emotional state. Emotions tell us what is happening in our soul. Pride is not at all a feeling to be cherished.

Come to terms with your own shortcomings

As strange as it sounds, you need to learn to accept yourself the way you are. Long-term work on oneself, negative always involves significant changes. But it's just as important to learn to accept the flaws you can't do anything about. Forgive yourself for small mistakes, understand that no one is perfect, and stop blaming yourself for the past. You can even thank yourself for the mistakes and mistakes that you once made. Without them, you would not have known that you can be a completely different person. In other words, thanks to the shortcomings, we move forward, develop and improve.

Thus, the concept of pride is closely related to emotional sphere person, his character, habits, way of life. In a small number of manifestations of this quality of character are characteristic of all people. What matters is how the person is going to work with pride.

Saint Ignatius Brianchaninov this vice refers to a whole range of actions, thoughts and experiences, from contempt for one's neighbor to heresy.

Perhaps, one can briefly characterize pride by paraphrasing the words of an ancient philosopher: “I am the measure of all things.” The danger of pride is not even that I consider myself the best. The fact is that I see events, other people, even God Himself only with my own eyes - and I believe that my vision is one hundred percent.

And my eyesight is at least no better than everyone else's. And by the way, the worst thing I can see myself. Your head seems to be the center of the universe - and yet this is only my universe, limited and small ...

The best advice for dealing with sin can be given by God Himself. as a "medicine against pride" suggests re-reading "the passages of Scripture directed against it" more often:

“When you have done all that is commanded to you, say: We are worthless servants, because we have done what we had to do” (Luke 17:10).

“He who thinks himself to be something, being nothing, deceives himself” (Gal. 6:3).

“What is high among men is an abomination before God” (Luke 16:15).

“Learn from Me, for I am meek and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls” (Matthew 11:29).

“He remembered us in our humiliation, for His mercy endures forever; and delivered us from our enemies, for his mercy endures forever” (Ps. 136:23-24).

“The Lord is merciful and righteous, and our God is merciful” (Ps. 115:5).

“Everyone who is haughty in heart is an abomination to the Lord” (Prov. 16:5).

To the Syrian verses recommended by St. Ephraim, one can add the well-known: “God opposes the proud, but gives grace to the humble” (James 4:6), “in the mouth of a fool is the scourge of pride; but the mouth of the wise guards them” (Prov. 14:3), “everything that is in the world: the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life, is not from the Father, but from this world” (1 John 2:16) and others quotes.

2. "It's not me"

Strictly speaking, we have nothing to be proud of. reminiscent of the parable of the servant doing his duty:

“As soon as possible, consign your merits and labors to oblivion. Shame on you if the bee and the ant surpass you in this. The fruit of pride in one's own merits is anger, quarrels and enmity between people, and behind them is an inevitable feeling of uselessness and despair. Have you ever seen a bee and an ant in despair? Indeed, it is a shame if they better people fulfill the commandment of Christ: When you have fulfilled everything commanded to you, say: we are worthless servants, because we have done what we had to do (Luke 17:10).

Rev. John Cassian the Roman also recommends attributing the success of his labors to God and explains:

“I say this not in order to humiliate human efforts, I would like to deflect anyone from caring and hard work. On the contrary, I resolutely affirm that perfection without them cannot be obtained in any way, and by them alone, without the grace of God, it cannot be brought to the proper degree by anyone. … The grace of God is communicated only to those who work in the sweat of their faces.”

3. Mathematical method of dealing with pride

“But I do a lot of good, right and kind!” - the proud will defend himself. And it will be wrong. "A lot" is how much? And if you compare with the number of sins?

This is what he advises to do:

“When a reckless thought comes to your mind - to count any of your good deeds, immediately correct this mistake and quickly count your sins, your continuous, countless insults to the all-good and righteous Master and you will find that you have them like the sand of the sea, and virtues in comparison with them, all the same that there are none.

4. Humiliation or humility?

An even more widespread debate than the debate about the nature of pride is where is the line between humility and humiliation? Is it true that a Christian should only have a "feeling of his own unworthiness"?

No it is not true. And the boundary is very simple: they humiliate a person against his will, and he himself humbles himself. Humility - active state. Metropolitan Anthony of Surozh says about him:

“When we are looking for humility, we can ask ourselves the question: how do we feel about the fact that the Lord sends us into this or that situation? With inner peace or with protest, with legibility? “I don’t want this, I want something else – why did You send me here? I want good, You had to send me to that environment where everyone around is kind and will inspire me, help me, carry me in my arms; why are You sending me into an environment where everything is darkness, where everything is bad, where everything is disharmony?”

This is our common reaction, and this is one of the indicators that our reaction is not humble. And when I say “humble,” I am not talking about feeling or acknowledging myself as defeated: “What will I do against the will of God – I will humble myself.” No, not defeat, but active humility, active reconciliation, active inner world make us messengers, apostles, people who are sent into the dark, bitter, difficult world and who know that there is their natural place or a fertile place.”

“It is most useful for people of a proud disposition to be in obedience, to lead a life of the coarsest and most contemptible ... Nothing so humbles the soul as being in poverty and living on alms.”

It is clear that independently treating pride with poverty or obedience - and living in a poor family or in humiliating slavery - are different things. In the second case, humility can also be useful (or harmful - which way you look), but this has nothing to do with the eradication of pride.

5. Punishment for sin

Which is difficult to blame for exaltation and drunkenness, gives quite radical advice - to punish yourself for pride, including physically. Actually, initially this is advice against anger:

“Find a rope - a plump one - and go to your sister. After laying a bow to the earth to her, say: good sister, do me a favor, with this rope give me a good blow. You can appoint a measure - five, ten strokes, if only it was sensitive. Do this after every outburst of anger. This technique is good against pride as well.”

After all, we do not live in a monastery in the 19th century, but in the world a century and a half later. If we invite our neighbor to flog us for displays of pride, best case this will confuse him. But punishing yourself on your own and without self-mutilation does not hurt.

Completed the task of the boss and turned up his nose - give up the football match. She looked down at her sloppily dressed colleague: “What’s the matter with my impeccable taste!” no dessert...

6. Feel free to cry

The Fathers of the Church often speak of the benefits of tears, and modern man it causes misunderstanding. What is the use of sentimental sobs - even penitential ones?

Saints are not sentimental. They know how to harshly denounce sin, their sermons are often formidable. Tears are needed not at all for touching feelings and not for contrition about one's hard life and injustice. Tears are an acknowledgment of one's imperfection.

Likened pride to a plant that grew on parched earth. A contrite heart lifts up the moist (wetted with tears) layers of the earth in order for the soul to bear new fruit. The cry of sympathy and repentance is the key to healing dry and callous pride.

“Tears of furious anger and tears of regret for lost or not received earthly wealth are not needed to build a paradise pyramid,” explains the saint. – Gospel tears are those that flow from a contrite and repentant heart. Evangelical tears are those tears that mourn for the lost Paradise. Evangelical tears are those tears that mix with the tears of children and sufferers. Evangelical tears are those tears that wash away the harm that we have done to heavenly Love.

7. Sole Healer

Let's go back to the beginning. Our eyesight is weak, we misjudge ourselves and others, therefore, to fully trust ourselves is pride, the gravest sin.

Our contemporary Archimandrite Kirill (Pavlov) likens a proud man to a man born blind from the Gospel - having received healing from the Savior, he was healed spiritually and believed in Him. On the contrary, people who did not want to accept the grace of Christ, the Pharisees, accused Him of performing miracles with demonic power. This manifestation is no longer simple, but satanic pride.

“He who is blind in soul due to pride and stubbornness is the most unfortunate person, the prey of hell, the fiend of Satan, saturated with the pride and malice of his father the devil. This is precisely the blasphemy against the Holy Spirit, when a person, out of pride and stubbornness, does not want to believe the obvious truth, which is proved by obvious miracles. There is no such forgiveness either in this or in the next century,” emphasizes Father Kirill.

Indeed, the conscious rejection of Christ - God - is the result of pride, its actual goal. So the surest remedy for this disease is to look to the One who can heal it. “In everything we should strive to imitate the way the Lord acted, as the Gospel teaches us.”